Politeness questionnaire

Arnabas · 10-31-2002, 08:57 AM

A post in the General area got me thinking about how manners and basic courtesy seem to be going the way of the dinosaur. That prompted this poll.

Darkman · 10-31-2002, 09:16 AM

I'm not a huge fan of please, but I always say thanks or thank you. But I have to agree with the consensus. I don't remember good manners ever being prominent in modern society, and they certainly aren't now. Most people nowadays don't even have the time to say "Get outta my way" before they cut in front of you.

Arnabas · 10-31-2002, 09:22 AM

I remember being out with my wife, her sister and her sister's daughter and husband. We were walking down a fairly crowded street when this guy passed us, hitting the baby carriage quite hard to move it out of his way. My wife's brother-in-law made some comment I can't remember, but the guy who had hit the carriage turned around and started yelling and I was sure a fight was going to break out. This guy was in a rush and thought everyone should just get out of his way.

A friend of mine was the manager of a comic store and when kids would point to something, and say "I want that" or "give me that" he refused to serve them until they asked politely and said "please". This got him in trouble with a number of parents, but I supported him. People aren't teaching their kinds any kinds of manners anymore.

Redblueflare · 10-31-2002, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Arnabas:
I remember being out with my wife, her sister and her sister's daughter and husband. We were walking down a fairly crowded street when this guy passed us, hitting the baby carriage quite hard to move it out of his way. My wife's brother-in-law made some comment I can't remember, but the guy who had hit the carriage turned around and started yelling and I was sure a fight was going to break out. This guy was in a rush and thought everyone should just get out of his way.
A friend of mine was the manager of a comic store and when kids would point to something, and say "I want that" or "give me that" he refused to serve them until they asked politely and said "please". This got him in trouble with a number of parents, but I supported him. People aren't teaching their kinds any kinds of manners anymore.

I'm not that old so I don't remember people ever being nice in public. It's very rare when you'll hear someone polite enough to say "Excuse me." When you do you just have to smile at that person. Why would parents have a problem with their child saying please? Whenever I need to ask for something in a store it's always "Excuse me can you help me find this please?" [img]tongue.gif[/img] He should've just ignored the parents until they said "Please listen to me!" [img]smile.gif[/img]

Lord Starshadow · 10-31-2002, 12:58 PM

Politeness has really gone south. It's bad when people are genuinely surprised when I do something polite, such as hold a door open, pull out a chair, or help someone carry things without being asked. I always thought it was common courtesy, but I guess common courtesy now is just to ignore everyone except for yourself. Sad, really.

antryg · 11-02-2002, 03:59 PM

I really hope that courtesy does make a comeback. I've read some studies that show that this is the only thing that holds Japanese society back from an outbreak of real violence and anarchy. When we are forced together we seem to be more like sandpaper, "rubbing each other the wrong way", than anything else.
A little courtesy goes a long way.

AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe · 11-02-2002, 04:23 PM

I dont think there is a person alive that ALWAYS says please and thank you, but I try to whenever applicable. I even stand when a lady comes to the table, and get out to open their car door myself when i take them out. Manners arent dead, but I have to agree that people generally aren't as polite as they used to be. In some places I've been people would just as soon kill you and leave your corpse in an alley to rot, as open a door for you. Its kind of sad really, but there are some people like that out there.

Aelia Jusa · 11-03-2002, 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Redblueflare:
I'm not that old so I don't remember people ever being nice in public.

I hope that's not true!! Most people I encounter are generally polite. As in they say please and thank you and queue up nicely and don't run into people and hold doors open for others. There are always people who don't care but I'm sure it was always like that. There may be a general lessening of politeness but I don't think we're at crisis stage yet.

There are some 'new' things that people don't seem to have got to go with manners yet. Moblie phones especially - taking calls in front of you, reading (and sending!) sms in front of you, leaving them on in cinemas and restaurants and doctor's surgeries, chatting at the supermarket and not looking where they're going...

Also people don't RSVP anymore! What's up with that? Maybe people are getting ruder

Charean · 11-03-2002, 08:34 PM

One time I was polite and the people thought I was Canadian.

Okay, that was a joke, but I do try. But I am old and I have to or my mom would have my head.

11-03-2002, 08:59 PM

I absolutely detest rudeness and bad manners. That's one thing that really gets to me. I always hold the door open for people, even if they're not quite in the door themselves yet. And I couldn't imagine not saying 'please' and 'thank you' at the appropriate times. I think society in general is getting ruder. It's an awful thing.

View Poll Results: Do you hold the door open for others?
Yes	21	87.50%
No	3	12.50%
Voters: 24. You may not vote on this poll

10-31-2002, 08:57 AM	#1
Arnabas Baaz Draconian Join Date: October 11, 2001 Location: Montreal,Quebec,Canada Age: 54 Posts: 721	A post in the General area got me thinking about how manners and basic courtesy seem to be going the way of the dinosaur. That prompted this poll. __________________ Est Sularis oth Mithas

10-31-2002, 09:16 AM	#2
Darkman Avatar Join Date: July 11, 2001 Location: Austin, Texas Age: 44 Posts: 525	I'm not a huge fan of please, but I always say thanks or thank you. But I have to agree with the consensus. I don't remember good manners ever being prominent in modern society, and they certainly aren't now. Most people nowadays don't even have the time to say "Get outta my way" before they cut in front of you. __________________ There more of it there is,<br />The less you see.

10-31-2002, 09:22 AM	#3
Arnabas Baaz Draconian Join Date: October 11, 2001 Location: Montreal,Quebec,Canada Age: 54 Posts: 721	I remember being out with my wife, her sister and her sister's daughter and husband. We were walking down a fairly crowded street when this guy passed us, hitting the baby carriage quite hard to move it out of his way. My wife's brother-in-law made some comment I can't remember, but the guy who had hit the carriage turned around and started yelling and I was sure a fight was going to break out. This guy was in a rush and thought everyone should just get out of his way. A friend of mine was the manager of a comic store and when kids would point to something, and say "I want that" or "give me that" he refused to serve them until they asked politely and said "please". This got him in trouble with a number of parents, but I supported him. People aren't teaching their kinds any kinds of manners anymore. __________________ Est Sularis oth Mithas

10-31-2002, 12:58 PM	#5
Lord Starshadow Quintesson Join Date: October 3, 2002 Location: The plane of non-existence... and Michigan Age: 44 Posts: 1,087	Politeness has really gone south. It's bad when people are genuinely surprised when I do something polite, such as hold a door open, pull out a chair, or help someone carry things without being asked. I always thought it was common courtesy, but I guess common courtesy now is just to ignore everyone except for yourself. Sad, really. __________________ Bah, I don\'t need a sig. You all don\'t care what I do anyway. <img border=\"0\" title=\"\" alt=\"[Razz]\" src=\"tongue.gif\" />

11-02-2002, 03:59 PM	#6
antryg Fzoul Chembryl Join Date: August 30, 2002 Location: Dallas, Tx. Age: 22 Posts: 1,765	I really hope that courtesy does make a comeback. I've read some studies that show that this is the only thing that holds Japanese society back from an outbreak of real violence and anarchy. When we are forced together we seem to be more like sandpaper, "rubbing each other the wrong way", than anything else. A little courtesy goes a long way. __________________

11-02-2002, 04:23 PM	#7
AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe Hathor Join Date: October 11, 2001 Location: At My Computer Age: 44 Posts: 2,217	I dont think there is a person alive that ALWAYS says please and thank you, but I try to whenever applicable. I even stand when a lady comes to the table, and get out to open their car door myself when i take them out. Manners arent dead, but I have to agree that people generally aren't as polite as they used to be. In some places I've been people would just as soon kill you and leave your corpse in an alley to rot, as open a door for you. Its kind of sad really, but there are some people like that out there. __________________ Now the swinging bridge<br />Is quieted with creepers. . . <br />Like our tendrilled life. -Basho

11-03-2002, 08:34 PM	#9
Charean Hathor Join Date: March 6, 2001 Location: Waxahachie, TX Age: 61 Posts: 2,201	One time I was polite and the people thought I was Canadian. Okay, that was a joke, but I do try. But I am old and I have to or my mom would have my head. __________________ And then there were 6.

11-03-2002, 08:59 PM	#10
Sorcerer Alex Guest Posts: n/a	I absolutely detest rudeness and bad manners. That's one thing that really gets to me. I always hold the door open for people, even if they're not quite in the door themselves yet. And I couldn't imagine not saying 'please' and 'thank you' at the appropriate times. I think society in general is getting ruder. It's an awful thing.

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