CHECK THIS OUT!!! come in come in!! its cool!

Harkoliar · 10-29-2001, 08:53 AM

Lesson Number One
*****************

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw
the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"
The crow answered: Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the
crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit, and
ate it.

Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Lesson Number Two
*****************

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree, "sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy. "
Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.

They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found
that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
Soon a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree, promptly spotted him.

Management Lesson:
BS might get you to the top, but it will not keep you there.

Lesson Number Three
********************

When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain
said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and
functions." The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and
get him to where he wants to go." The hands said, "We should be the Boss
because we do all the work and earn all the money.

So it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally
the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being
the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.

Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet
twitched, the heart, lungs began to panic, and the brain fevered. Eventually
they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the
shit!

Management Lesson:
You do not need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.

Lesson Number Four
*******************

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold; the bird froze
and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came
by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow
dung, it began to realize how warm it was.

The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy,
and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came
to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile
of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!

Management Lessons:
1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3) In addition, when you are in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!

NOT QUITE WHAT IS TAUGHT AT Management school!

------------------
Revived I Am to hunt this world... Banish ye evil or face my wrath...

DragonMage · 10-29-2001, 08:56 AM

I have one that might fit in with this:

Life at work is like a tree full of monkeys,
All on different limbs at different levels.
Some monkeys are climbing up, some down.
The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces.
The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but @$$holes.

------------------

Alureth...Dragon friend of Breanna, Mage and Advisor in the Court of Lady Lioness

Co-Owner/Operator of the Evil Petting Zoo and devout member of the HADB clan.
Commander of the Dragon Fleet, IW Peacekeeping Force
Sublime Sister of the Illuminati - may the Light shine forever!
Second Historian and Scribe of IW. Mother Hen of IW.
Mage extraordinair, Pin-Up Girl for the OLD-COOTS
Magey-Wagey: performer in the Nekked Dancing Trio of the ORT.

Hopeless Romantic *sigh*

[This message has been edited by DragonMage (edited 10-29-2001).]

Lifetime · 10-29-2001, 11:29 AM

Timelessly funny

Dragonmage I've never heard that one before

------------------
No-Name Face

10-29-2001, 11:39 AM

Very funny!

------------------

Where there are monsters and barbarians there will be Byronas fighting against them.
Leader of Keldorn's Order

Neb · 10-29-2001, 11:44 AM

ROFL! LOL! Good ones Hark! You too DM!

Harkoliar · 10-29-2001, 07:49 PM

bumpin for others to see this

------------------
Revived I Am to hunt this world... Banish ye evil or face my wrath...

Harkoliar · 10-30-2001, 04:21 AM

bumpin once more till i let it freefall

------------------
Revived I Am to hunt this world... Banish ye evil or face my wrath...

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10-29-2001, 08:53 AM	#1
Harkoliar Jack Burton Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Philippines, but now Harbor City Sydney Age: 42 Posts: 5,556	Lesson Number One *************** A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit, and ate it. Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up. Lesson Number Two ************* A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree, "sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy. " Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree, promptly spotted him. Management Lesson: BS might get you to the top, but it will not keep you there. Lesson Number Three **************** When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions." The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go." The hands said, "We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money. So it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart, lungs began to panic, and the brain fevered. Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit! Management Lesson: You do not need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do. Lesson Number Four ***************** A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold; the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him! Management Lessons: 1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy. 2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. 3) In addition, when you are in deep shit, keep your mouth shut! NOT QUITE WHAT IS TAUGHT AT Management school! ------------------ Revived I Am to hunt this world... Banish ye evil or face my wrath...

10-29-2001, 08:56 AM	#2
DragonMage 20th Level Warrior Join Date: September 6, 2001 Location: The lighter side of life, a.k.a. Newnan, Georgia Age: 56 Posts: 2,767	I have one that might fit in with this: Life at work is like a tree full of monkeys, All on different limbs at different levels. Some monkeys are climbing up, some down. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but @$$holes. ------------------ Alureth...Dragon friend of Breanna, Mage and Advisor in the Court of Lady Lioness Co-Owner/Operator of the Evil Petting Zoo and devout member of the HADB clan. Commander of the Dragon Fleet, IW Peacekeeping Force Sublime Sister of the Illuminati - may the Light shine forever! Second Historian and Scribe of IW. Mother Hen of IW. Mage extraordinair, Pin-Up Girl for the OLD-COOTS Magey-Wagey: performer in the Nekked Dancing Trio of the ORT. Hopeless Romantic sigh [This message has been edited by DragonMage (edited 10-29-2001).]

10-29-2001, 11:29 AM	#3
Lifetime Red Dragon Join Date: March 3, 2001 Location: Scotch College, Melbourne Posts: 1,503	Timelessly funny Dragonmage I've never heard that one before ------------------ No-Name Face

10-29-2001, 11:39 AM	#4
Byronas Guest Posts: n/a	Very funny! ------------------ Where there are monsters and barbarians there will be Byronas fighting against them. Leader of Keldorn's Order

10-29-2001, 11:44 AM	#5
Neb Account deleted by Request Join Date: May 17, 2001 Location: . Age: 39 Posts: 8,802	ROFL! LOL! Good ones Hark! You too DM!

10-29-2001, 07:49 PM	#6
Harkoliar Jack Burton Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Philippines, but now Harbor City Sydney Age: 42 Posts: 5,556	bumpin for others to see this ------------------ Revived I Am to hunt this world... Banish ye evil or face my wrath...

10-30-2001, 04:21 AM	#7
Harkoliar Jack Burton Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Philippines, but now Harbor City Sydney Age: 42 Posts: 5,556	bumpin once more till i let it freefall ------------------ Revived I Am to hunt this world... Banish ye evil or face my wrath...

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