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Lesson Number One
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A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw
the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"
The crow answered: Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the
crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit, and
ate it.

Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Lesson Number Two
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A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree, "sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy. "
Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.

They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found
that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
Soon a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree, promptly spotted him.

Management Lesson:
BS might get you to the top, but it will not keep you there.

Lesson Number Three
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When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain
said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and
functions." The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and
get him to where he wants to go." The hands said, "We should be the Boss
because we do all the work and earn all the money.

So it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally
the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being
the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.

Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet
twitched, the heart, lungs began to panic, and the brain fevered. Eventually
they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the
shit!

Management Lesson:
You do not need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.

Lesson Number Four
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A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold; the bird froze
and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came
by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow
dung, it began to realize how warm it was.

The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy,
and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came
to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile
of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!

Management Lessons:
1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3) In addition, when you are in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!

NOT QUITE WHAT IS TAUGHT AT Management school!

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Revived I Am to hunt this world... Banish ye evil or face my wrath...