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#1 |
Jack Burton
![]() Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Aussie now in the US of A!
Age: 38
Posts: 5,403
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Elementary, My Dear Watson
One lovely evening, the detective Sherlock Holmes and his trusty friend Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After having dinner and drinking a few glasses of wine, they became tired and went to sleep. A couple hours passed and Sherlock Holmes awoke, and shortly thereafter woke Dr. Watson as well. He said, "Watson, look up, and tell me what you see." Dr. Watson replied, "Well, sir, I see millions of stars in the sky." Sherlock Holmes asked, "And what does that tell you?" Dr. Watson paused for a moment and said, "Well, astronomically it tells me that there are billions of stars and possibly millions of galaxies in the universe. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Horalogically I can deduce that it is approximately quarter past three in the morning. Theologically it symbolizes that God is magnificent and that we humans are small and insignificant in the universe. And meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." To which Sherlock Holmes replied, "No, stupid! Someone has stolen our tent!" |
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#2 |
Symbol of Cyric
![]() Join Date: May 12, 2002
Location: Atlanta
Age: 37
Posts: 1,360
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haha heard it before, pretty good though. heres one!
Warning: not for those who are offended by course words and possiby Canadians [img]smile.gif[/img] ------ Canada There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market. A man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man replied that he did not need a whole head, but only a half head. The boy said he would go ask his manager about the matter. The boy walked into the back room and said, "there is some asshole out there who wants to buy only a half a head of lettuce." As he was finishing saying this he turned around to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, "and this gentleman wants to buy the other half". The manager okayed the deal and the man went on his way. Later the manager called on the boy and said, "you almost got yourself in a lot of trouble earlier, but I must say I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of it. You think on your feet and we like that around here. Where are you from son?" The boy replied, "Canada. sir." "Oh really? Why did you leave Canada?" asked the manager. The boy replied, "They're all just whores and hockey players up there." "My wife is from Canada!!" said the manager. The boy replied, "Really? What team did she play for?" ![]() ![]() ![]() [ 03-15-2003, 07:35 PM: Message edited by: Xero279 ]
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Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
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