20 Excuses for not going to work

[Arvon]

I was sprayed by a skunk.


I tripped over my dog and was knocked unconscious.


My bus broke down and was held up by robbers.


I was arrested as a result of mistaken identity.


I forgot to come back to work after lunch.


I couldn't find my shoes.


I hurt myself bowling.


I was spit on by a venomous snake.


I totaled my wife's jeep in a collision with a cow.


A hitman was looking for me.


My curlers burned my hair and I had to go to the hairdresser.


I eloped.


My brain went to sleep and I couldn't wake it up.


My cat unplugged my alarm clock.


I had to be there for my husband's grand jury trial.


I had to ship my grandmother's bones to India.


I forgot what day of the week it was.


Someone slipped drugs in my drink last night.


A tree fell on my car.


My monkey died.

[Brayf]

I remember a boy in my form at school, whose excuse for missing the first two weeks of school was "I couldn't find my tie."

[mad=dog]

If you miss a day of work just say "What a marvelous Monday morning!" to your boss the next day.

[bjorn]

Before i began studying this fall i worked at an office, one girl who worked there didden't come in one evening (they worked evenings there as well). My boss phoned her and asked her why she hadden't come in for work and her excuse was: "I can't come in today, my shoes are wet!"........

[Sir Degrader]

Hell why not just say you didn't want to?