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09-04-2005, 08:16 PM
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Legion Symbol
 Join Date: February 14, 2002
Location: Ireland
Age: 40
Posts: 7,368
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Who is Jack Schitt you ask? The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says " you don't know jack schitt." Now you can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O Schitt, the owner of kneedeep N. Schitt, Inc. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt,Giva Schitt,Bull Schitt, and the twins, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' wishes, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.
Noe Schitt later married Mr. Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a nervous son, Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout their childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. Thewedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg,Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son left home to tour the world, and recently returned from Italy with his new bride, Pisa Schitt. So now when someone says, "you don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them.
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ZFR |
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09-04-2005, 10:39 PM
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#2 |
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The Dreadnoks
 Join Date: September 27, 2001
Location: Orlando, FL
Age: 62
Posts: 3,608
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ROFLMAO!
Whew, that has got to be the best schitt talk I have ever heard/read!
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The Lizzie Palmer Tribute  Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty. John F. Kennedy 35th President of The United States The Last Shot Honor The Fallen Jesus died for our sins, and American Soldiers died for our freedom.  If you don't stand behind our Soldiers, please feel free to stand in front of them. |
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09-04-2005, 10:57 PM
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#3 |
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Jack Burton
 Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Aussie now in the US of A!
Age: 38
Posts: 5,403
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lol, I love that story.
I actually have a "do you know Jack Schitt" poster with all that on it and the family tree 
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09-05-2005, 12:30 AM
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#4 |
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Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
 Join Date: October 31, 2002
Location: Western Australia
Age: 44
Posts: 3,293
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I've read it before as well. But it's still a good laugh.
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Say say, oh playmate i cannot play with you my dolly's got the flu boo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo |
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09-05-2005, 12:35 AM
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#5 |
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Symbol of Cyric
 Join Date: August 22, 2003
Location: Ohio, Go Tribe
Age: 38
Posts: 1,131
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So its quite a big schitt house then.
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Veni, Vidi, Vici |
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09-05-2005, 05:24 AM
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#6 |
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Zhentarim Guard
 Join Date: February 21, 2005
Location: Candlekeep
Age: 38
Posts: 372
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What a Schitt thread.
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09-05-2005, 05:58 AM
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#7 |
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Jack Burton
Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Aussie now in the US of A!
Age: 38
Posts: 5,403
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Ok, I think you should all stop talking Schitt and leave this thread alone.
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09-05-2005, 06:04 AM
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#8 |
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Zartan
 Join Date: May 2, 2001
Location: Ulpia Noviomagus Batavorum
Age: 44
Posts: 5,281
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Didn't someone make this into a flash movie a couple of years back?
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09-05-2005, 08:47 AM
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#9 |
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Takhisis Follower
 Join Date: April 30, 2001
Location: szép Magyarország (well not right now)
Posts: 5,089
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Man this thread is fulla shit...oops
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Too set in his ways to ever relate If he could set that aside, there'd be heaven to pay But weathered and aged, time swept him to grave Love conquers all? Damn, I'd say that area's gray |
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09-05-2005, 08:56 AM
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#10 |
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Zhentarim Guard
Join Date: February 21, 2005
Location: Candlekeep
Age: 38
Posts: 372
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...Oh! I just got it!
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