You too can talk southern....

[Arvon]

Y'allbonics

The Association of Southern Schools has decided to seek a grant designating Southern slang, or Y'allbonics, as a language to be taught in all Southern schools. The following are excerpts from the Y'allbonics/English dictionary.

1) HEIDI - (noun) - Greeting.

2) HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting. Usage: "Heidi, Hire yew?"

3) BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow". Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

4) JAWJUH - (noun) - The state north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck and took it to Lanner."

5) BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayam. Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,00 in improvements."

6) MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."

7) THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process. Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."

8) BARE - (noun) - An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast. Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a nutter bare."

9) IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart. See "Arkansas native." Usage:" Them bammer boys sure are ignert!"

10) RANCH - (noun) - A tool used for tight'nin' bolts. Usage: "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

11) ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant. Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

12) FAR - (noun) - A conflagration. Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup truck, that thang's gonna catch far."

13) TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel. Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

14) TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument. Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

15) RETARD - (verb) - To stop working. Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."

16) FAT - (noun and verb) - A battle or combat; to engage in battle or combat. Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup yuh."

17) RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege. Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."

18) CHEER - (adverb) - In this place. Usage: "Jest set that bare rat cheer."

19) FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic. Usage: "I cuddin't unnerstand a wurd he sed . . . must be from some farn country."

20) DID - (adjective) - Not alive. Usage: "He's did, Jim."

21) ARE - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas containing oxygen. Usage: "He cain't breathe . . . give 'im some are!!"

22) BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: "Boy, stay away from that there bob war fence."

23) JEW HERE - (pronoun and verb) - Contraction. Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump'ny?"

24) HAZE - (pronoun and verb) - A contraction. Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah . . . haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a minnit'n 'is laf."

25) SEED - (verb) - Past tense of "to see." Usage: "I ain't never seed Noo Yawk City."

26) VIEW - (verb and pronoun) - contraction. Usage: "I ain't never seed Noo Yawk City. . . view?"

27) GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution. Usage: "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert."

[InjaYew]

5) BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayam. Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,00 in improvements."

The capitol of Alabama is Montgomery. I reckon the author of this little piece of sarcasm is a tad on the ignernt side...

[Kakero]

Can't imagine how someone is able to speak like that.

[ryaldin]

You'd never believe it until you actually hear somebody say 'Y'all'...=D

[VulcanRider]

28) WICHA-DIJA - (interrogatory phrase) - "Y'all didn't bring yer truck wicha-dija? -- J.Foxworthy

[SomeGuy]

Originally posted by Kakero: Can't imagine how someone is able to speak like that.

Try speaking the popular kid language dude. It's even worse.

[Nerull]

Originally posted by Kakero: Can't imagine how someone is able to speak like that.

I live in the Southern U.S. I hear it every day. As with any other language/dialect, someone walking in hears it and thinks "weird accent". Meanwhile, they hear you and think the same.

However, people really do speak like that. Watch the new Real World on MTV. They have a girl on there that is from a small town in South Carolina. She has a pretty heavy Southern accent, and you will get an example of exactly what it sounds like.