Some new computer viruses (PG13)

Arvon · 11-24-2003, 11:59 AM

Several new viruses have been discovered and are wreaking havoc throughout the national system. Beware of . . .
THE CLINTON Virus... (Gives you a 7 Inch Hard Drive with NO memory)
THE BOB DOLE (aka: VIAGRA) virus... (Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy)
THE LEWINSKY virus... (Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then Emails everyone about what it did)
THE RONALD REAGAN virus... (Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored)
THE MIKE TYSON virus... (Quits after two bytes)
THE OPRAH WINFREY virus... (Your 300mb hard drive shrinks to 100mb, then slowly expands to stabilize around 200MB)
THE JACK KAVORKIAN virus... (Deletes all old files)
THE ELLEN DEGENERES virus... (Disks can no longer be inserted)
THE PROZAC virus... (Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care)
THE JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus... (Only attacks minor files)
THE ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus (Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back)
THE LORENA BOBBITT virus... (Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows)

Daniel_M · 11-24-2003, 12:11 PM

Haha, yeah...great stuff [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

RoSs_bg2_rox · 11-24-2003, 12:13 PM

lol, they were ok, some better than others, but not your best ever jokes!

wellard · 11-24-2003, 09:42 PM

LOL very good Arvon [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

Firestormalpha · 11-24-2003, 09:55 PM

lol. funny.

/)eathKiller · 11-24-2003, 10:35 PM

Pretty funny stuff!

ZaRos · 11-24-2003, 10:44 PM

Hehe that was funny [img]smile.gif[/img]
Could we please have more of that kind of entertainment?!?

pcgiant · 11-25-2003, 03:02 AM

lol, very good.

Bozos of Bones · 11-25-2003, 05:04 AM

Some time ago when I said that Arvon can do better, this is what I was thinking of. Good jokes!

Intrepid · 11-25-2003, 07:58 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Arvon:
THE MIKE TYSON virus... (Quits after two bytes)

lol, great!

Quote:

THE JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus... (Only attacks minor files)
THE LORENA BOBBITT virus... (Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows)

Didn't get those two

11-24-2003, 11:59 AM	#1
Arvon Unicorn Join Date: October 4, 2001 Location: Kingdom of the West,..P.o. Cynagus Posts: 4,212	Several new viruses have been discovered and are wreaking havoc throughout the national system. Beware of . . . THE CLINTON Virus... (Gives you a 7 Inch Hard Drive with NO memory) THE BOB DOLE (aka: VIAGRA) virus... (Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy) THE LEWINSKY virus... (Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then Emails everyone about what it did) THE RONALD REAGAN virus... (Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored) THE MIKE TYSON virus... (Quits after two bytes) THE OPRAH WINFREY virus... (Your 300mb hard drive shrinks to 100mb, then slowly expands to stabilize around 200MB) THE JACK KAVORKIAN virus... (Deletes all old files) THE ELLEN DEGENERES virus... (Disks can no longer be inserted) THE PROZAC virus... (Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care) THE JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus... (Only attacks minor files) THE ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus (Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back) THE LORENA BOBBITT virus... (Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows) __________________ 53.7% of all statistics are made up

11-24-2003, 12:11 PM	#2
Daniel_M Elminster Join Date: October 17, 2001 Location: London, England Age: 41 Posts: 480	Haha, yeah...great stuff [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] __________________ \"Sarcasm is a sign of genius.\"<br /><br />[url]\"http://www.hellspawnonline.tk\" target=\"_blank\">Hellspawn-Online.tk</a>

11-24-2003, 12:13 PM	#3
RoSs_bg2_rox Zartan Join Date: May 20, 2003 Location: Near Aberdeen, Scotland Age: 35 Posts: 5,225	lol, they were ok, some better than others, but not your best ever jokes! __________________ [img]\"http://img.ranchoweb.com/images/ladyzekke/dragonwater2.gif\" alt=\" - \" />

11-24-2003, 09:42 PM	#4
wellard Dracolisk Join Date: November 1, 2002 Location: Australia ..... G\'day! Posts: 6,123	LOL very good Arvon [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] __________________ fossils - natures way of laughing at creationists for over 3 billion years

11-24-2003, 09:55 PM	#5
Firestormalpha Knight of the Rose Join Date: July 11, 2002 Location: Coral Springs, Fl USA Age: 41 Posts: 4,454	lol. funny. __________________ "When you start with a presupposition, it's hard to arrive at any other conclusion." "We are never to judge a philosophy by its abuse." - Augustine "If you're wondering if God has a sense of humor, consider the platypus." http://www.greaterthings.cbglades.com

11-24-2003, 10:35 PM	#6
/)eathKiller Dracolisk Join Date: January 5, 2002 Location: Guantanamo Bay, Cuba Age: 39 Posts: 6,043	Pretty funny stuff! __________________ [img]\"http://membres.lycos.fr/th8or/ZeroSigForIronworks.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> o.o;

11-24-2003, 10:44 PM	#7
ZaRos Dungeon Master Join Date: October 30, 2003 Location: denmark Age: 44 Posts: 80	Hehe that was funny [img]smile.gif[/img] Could we please have more of that kind of entertainment?!? __________________ But — as Jean-Paul Sartre almost said — forget recycled urine; true hell is other people <img border=\"0\" title=\"\" alt=\"[Smile]\" src=\"smile.gif\" />

11-25-2003, 03:02 AM	#8
pcgiant Symbol of Cyric Join Date: July 11, 2002 Location: NZ Age: 38 Posts: 1,268	lol, very good. __________________ If possible, I want to relive my life... not as a devil. This time, someone like you.

11-25-2003, 05:04 AM	#9
Bozos of Bones Apophis Join Date: July 29, 2003 Location: The Underdark cavern of Zagreb Age: 38 Posts: 4,679	Some time ago when I said that Arvon can do better, this is what I was thinking of. Good jokes! __________________ MAKE LOVE, NOT SPAM!

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