IN THE BEGINNING.....

[Arvon]

It is a bit long, and it's funny...

In the beginning God created the Heavens and the Earth. And the Earth
was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep.
And Satan said, "It doesn't get any better than this."
And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. Then God
said, "Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit
tree yielding fruit," and God saw that it was good.

And Satan said, "There goes the neighborhood."
God said, "Let us make Man in our image, after our likeness, and let
them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air
and over the cattle, and over all the Earth, and over every creeping thing
that creepeth upon the Earth." So God created Man in His own image; male
and female created He them.

And God looked upon Man and Woman and saw that they were lean and fit.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her figure
that man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth chocolate. And Woman gained 5 lb.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
And Satan brought forth Ben & Jerry's. And Woman gained 10 lb.

And God said, "I have sent thee heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil
with which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own
platter.
And Man gained 10 lb. and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.
And God brought forth running shoes and Man resolved to lose those
extra pounds.

And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not
have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man gained
another 20 pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."
So then God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat
and brimming with nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center
into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip also.
Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in
cholesterol.

And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach,
green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long
and healthy lives.

And Satan created McDonald's. McDonald's brought forth the $.99 double
cheeseburger.
And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?" And
Man said, "Supersize them." And Man gained 5 pounds.

And Satan saw and said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And Satan smiled and created HMOs.

The story of my life

[Charean]

Alas... too many can relate to that one!!

Excellent story!... Now to lose that 20 pounds.... sigh...... [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[SomeGuy]

HMO's? What a funny story.

[Horatio]

Heh. It's funny cos it's true. Heh.