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#1 |
Manshoon
![]() Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Ireland
Age: 47
Posts: 201
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Some of these are a bit rude but funny nontheless. I'm not sure if these have been posted b4, but anyway, here goes....The following was taken from actual employee evaluations:
1. Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and shows signs of starting to dig. 2. His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity. 3. I would not allow this man to breed. 4. This associate is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definitely won't be. 5. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap. 6. When he opens his mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there. 7. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle. 8. This man has delusions of adequacy. 9. He sets low personal standards and the consistently fails to achieve them. 10. This employee should go far -- the sooner he starts, the better. 11. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. 12. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer. 13. Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't looking. 14. A room temperature I.Q. 15. Got a full six-pack, but is missing the plastic thingy that holds it together. 16. A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus. 17. A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on. 18. A prime candidate for natural deselection. 19. Bright as Alaska in December. 20. One-celled organisms outscore him in I.Q. tests. 21. Donated his brain to science before he was quite finished using it. 22. Fell out of his family tree. 23. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the trains isn't coming. 24. This man has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it. 25. He's so dense,light bends around him. 26. If brains were taxed, he would get a rebate. 27. Any dumber and he would have to be watered twice a week. 28. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you would get change back. 29. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean. 30. It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm. 31. One neuron short of a synapse. 32. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he gargled. 33. Was left on the Tilt-A-Whirl a bit too long as a baby. 34. Not the brightest bulb in the chandelier.
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\"He looked right through me, with soniforous almond eyes, don\'t even know what that means, must remember to write it down\" |
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#2 |
The Magister
![]() Join Date: November 9, 2001
Location: solamnia
Posts: 139
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Thanks for that. Some of those are too funny. I remember seeing that somewhere before but had forgotten all about it. I,m printing off a copy right now. [img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img]
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#3 |
Manshoon
![]() Join Date: January 17, 2002
Location: Balmora
Age: 49
Posts: 167
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I think we should sterilze moron's at birth. I love writing evalutations it gives me a chance to vent my frustration with the idiots I have working for me.
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Lord Killjoy<br />Lord Killjoy\'s Graphics |
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#4 |
The Magister
![]() Join Date: November 9, 2001
Location: solamnia
Posts: 139
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quote: If they are working for you, then it was you who hired them was it not? ![]()
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