EXCLUSIVE! KERAH STATUE WALKS OFF ALTAR, MOONS PUBLIC

[Sazerac]

THE GAEL SERRAN EXAMINER
KERAH STATUE WALKS OFF ALTAR, MOONS PUBLIC



In an unprecedented occurence, the Bersault Crypt statue of Kerah, Holy Protector, animated itself, walked off the altar, and can now be seen mooning either a highly amused or outraged public, reported early this morning.

A questing party observed the highly unorthodox behavior of the statue while visiting the crypt earlier today. One of the questing party members, Sylvia, a devout follower of Kerah, did her best to keep the picture from being published, but her highly amused male companions would have nothing of it.

Kris, a warlock member of the party, was quoted as saying: "We've been to this crypt many times, and there have been many strange occurrences there, but this absolutely takes the cake."

The rare shot was obtained by the party's bard, Daevi, although the young priestess Sylvia had to be detained by the other two adventurers while he shot the scene. Rumor has it that there is a terseness in the questing party at this time.

Many advocates of Kerah have come forth and denounced the picture as a "hoax"; yet another one of the evil Dark Lord's attempts to discredit the Holy Protector. The party leader, Sigir, a barbarian, was quoted as saying, "This is no hoax. I am the Chosen One, and I guess I know Kerah better than anyone else in this land, other than holy Anephas. What you see before you is REAL. If anyone doubts the reality of this picture, come to the crypt near Valeia and see for yourself."

Although no one knows for sure what caused this "miracle" to occur, rumor has it that it may be an elaborate trick perpetrated by one Rethpian, the stout cryptkeeper, during a drunken binge brought on by eating too many fermented rat pies.

NEXT ISSUE: ANCIENT DRAGON FOUND COHABITING WITH SMALL GNOME IN COMPROMISING SITUATION

Be sure to pick up the next issue of the GAEL SERRAN EXAMINER. Remember: Minds that need examining want to KNOW!

______________________________________

Sazerac, Editor

ROFLMFAO!

You're a disturbed guy, Sazerac

She did that to me the first time I played through; she was balanced so precariously on the edge of the pedestal that, were the physics models actually in accordance with the real world, she would've long since fallen flat on her rather undetailed face...

Curiously enough, she's never done that since the first time...

OMG! LMFAO!

She walked off the alter in the game I played but my party never thought to "inspect" her backside, lol! Poor guys missed out! Seeing that may have made them more powerful! They would have fought harder! They could have gone through the path of the Wizard! Oh! The humanity!

ROFLOLWP! TOO FUNNY! Never thought to look at the other side! Excellent!

Oh, I looked at *every* side of that bloody statue; this was very early October, before anyone had written a walkthrough, and before I'd discovered this message board.

It never occured to me to read the locket...

I deduced that the only path left in the crypt was through that grate and I figured that somehow touching her, whacking at her with my sword(s), and casting every spell I had on her would convince her to open up the grate... I met with somewhat limited success, I might add

Nice bum though.....lmao

It should have a gossip column....

[Wyvern]

How excellently twisted!!!!



Wyv

Dear Madda Mabig,

I think my husband's cheating on me!
I have accused him of this. He says that they were just 'friends.' Hah! He thought I didn't know about his travels to the spire, the shoud, and his secret favorite pet name for his dragon.
Every time I confronted him about it, He tells me that he's just on a 'quest!'
Then I decided to follow him to the caves. I have walked in found my husband with a dragon. They spotted me and they broke apart. I turned around and left the caves.
He followed me home and explained to me that he did it just to get this 'Mavin Sword.'
I told him that I want a divorce.

oh Madda what can I do?

Sincerely Yours,
A Gnomebody!

[Scronan]

Saz,

You demented man! HAHAHAHAHAH! Thats a riot! Now I'm patiently waiting for more.

Scronan

back to hiding in the shadows