What Kids are Learning in School.... humor

Charean · 11-03-2002, 10:20 AM

The interdisciplinary comments of some grade schoolers saved for posterity by school teachers who kept journals of amusing things their students wrote in papers:

- The future of "I give" is "I take."

- The parts of speech are lungs and air.

- The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes.

- A census taker is man who goes from house to house increasing the population.

- Water is composed of two gins. Oxygin and hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.

- (Define H2O and CO2.) H2O is hot water and CO2 is cold water.

- A virgin forest is a forest where the hand of man has never set foot.

- The general direction of the Alps is straight up.

- A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water then forcing it through an aviator.

- Most of the houses in France are made of plaster of Paris.

- The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 opossums.

- The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom.

- We do not raise silk worms in the United States, because we get our silk from rayon. He is a larger worm and gives more silk.

- One of the main causes of dust is janitors.

- A scout obeys all to whom obedience is due and respects all duly constipated authorities.

- One by -product of raising cattle is calves.

- To prevent head colds, use an agonizer to spray into the nose until it drips into the throat.

- The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

- The climate is hottest next to the Creator.

- Oliver Cromwell had a large red nose, but under it were deeply religious feelings

- The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom.

- Syntax is all the money collected at the church from sinners.

- The blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other.

- In spring, the salmon swim upstream to spoon.

- Iron was discovered because someone smelt it.

- In the middle of the 18th century, all the morons moved to Utah.

- A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in the winter.

Dundee Slaytern · 11-03-2002, 10:33 AM

I'm hurting.

Mack_Attack · 11-03-2002, 11:09 AM

Very cute. [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

DJG · 11-03-2002, 11:13 AM

Hilarious!!

Kaltia · 11-03-2002, 03:25 PM

..and all have turned up in my english book at one point or another

True_Moose · 11-03-2002, 03:29 PM

I have never seen those before, certainly not done them. [img]graemlins/uhoh2.gif[/img] ROFL!

antryg · 11-04-2002, 12:54 AM

These are great. Did someone give you a jokebook or are you just funny *ahem*, I mean, do you have a well developed sense of humor coupled with creativity.

Dagorion · 11-04-2002, 02:40 AM

ROFL! I laughed so hard I hurt my throat... or maby it was that chilli sauce I drank... anyway, chilli sauce drinking aside, GREAT WORK!

Daniel Doolan · 11-04-2002, 08:27 AM

L.O.L THANKS

11-03-2002, 10:20 AM	#1
Charean Hathor Join Date: March 6, 2001 Location: Waxahachie, TX Age: 60 Posts: 2,201	The interdisciplinary comments of some grade schoolers saved for posterity by school teachers who kept journals of amusing things their students wrote in papers: - The future of "I give" is "I take." - The parts of speech are lungs and air. - The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes. - A census taker is man who goes from house to house increasing the population. - Water is composed of two gins. Oxygin and hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water. - (Define H2O and CO2.) H2O is hot water and CO2 is cold water. - A virgin forest is a forest where the hand of man has never set foot. - The general direction of the Alps is straight up. - A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water then forcing it through an aviator. - Most of the houses in France are made of plaster of Paris. - The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 opossums. - The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom. - We do not raise silk worms in the United States, because we get our silk from rayon. He is a larger worm and gives more silk. - One of the main causes of dust is janitors. - A scout obeys all to whom obedience is due and respects all duly constipated authorities. - One by -product of raising cattle is calves. - To prevent head colds, use an agonizer to spray into the nose until it drips into the throat. - The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. - The climate is hottest next to the Creator. - Oliver Cromwell had a large red nose, but under it were deeply religious feelings - The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom. - Syntax is all the money collected at the church from sinners. - The blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other. - In spring, the salmon swim upstream to spoon. - Iron was discovered because someone smelt it. - In the middle of the 18th century, all the morons moved to Utah. - A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in the winter. __________________ And then there were 6.

11-03-2002, 11:09 AM	#3
Mack_Attack Osiris - Egyptian God of the Underworld Join Date: May 22, 2001 Location: Sherwoodpark,Alberta,Canada Age: 51 Posts: 2,929	Very cute. [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] __________________

11-03-2002, 03:29 PM	#6
True_Moose Gold Dragon Join Date: June 18, 2002 Location: Wolfville, NS / Calgary, AB Age: 36 Posts: 2,563	I have never seen those before, certainly not done them. [img]graemlins/uhoh2.gif[/img] ROFL! __________________ [img]\"http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f13/true_moose/Siggy.jpg\" alt=\" - \" />

11-04-2002, 12:54 AM	#7
antryg Fzoul Chembryl Join Date: August 30, 2002 Location: Dallas, Tx. Age: 21 Posts: 1,765	These are great. Did someone give you a jokebook or are you just funny ahem, I mean, do you have a well developed sense of humor coupled with creativity. __________________

11-04-2002, 02:40 AM	#8
Dagorion Red Wizard of Thay Join Date: November 23, 2001 Location: That coffee stain on your map (Australia) Age: 37 Posts: 868	ROFL! I laughed so hard I hurt my throat... or maby it was that chilli sauce I drank... anyway, chilli sauce drinking aside, GREAT WORK! __________________ <br />2,500 left handers die each year using products designed for right handers.

11-03-2002, 10:33 AM	#2
Dundee Slaytern Ironworks Moderator Join Date: June 10, 2001 Location: Pasir Ris, Singapore Age: 41 Posts: 11,063	I'm hurting.

11-03-2002, 11:13 AM	#4
DJG Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 16, 2001 Location: Manchester, England Age: 35 Posts: 1,109	Hilarious!!

11-03-2002, 03:25 PM	#5
Kaltia Jack Burton Join Date: May 2, 2002 Location: Canterbury, England Age: 37 Posts: 5,817	..and all have turned up in my english book at one point or another

11-04-2002, 08:27 AM	#9
Daniel Doolan Elite Waterdeep Guard Join Date: October 14, 2002 Location: I am to dumb say... Age: 36 Posts: 40	L.O.L THANKS __________________ the matrix has you<br /> <br />neo<br /><br />[url]\"http://\" target=\"_blank\"></a>

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