RULES LEFT OUT

John D Harris · 11-23-2001, 04:19 PM

SOME RULES LEFT OUT OF "LIFE'S LITTLE INSTRUCTION BOOK"

1. The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.

2. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

3. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

4. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

5. Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check out 3 of your friends. If they're okay, guess what?

6. Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.
7. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.

8. It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

10. If you are given an open book exam, you will forget your book.

13. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve
as a warning to others.

14. You can't fall off the floor.

15. The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

16. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

17. Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.

18. Law of Probability Distribution: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

Sir ReGiN · 11-23-2001, 04:21 PM

ROTFLMAO!!

[img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

Neb · 11-23-2001, 04:36 PM

ROFL John D, heheheh "5. Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check out 3 of your friends. If they're okay, guess what?" ROFLMAO!

Legolas · 11-23-2001, 05:56 PM

That was funny [img]smile.gif[/img]
But what happened to 11 and 12?

Grand-Ranger · 11-23-2001, 11:59 PM

7. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.

I liked that one

ROFL John D!

Harkoliar · 11-24-2001, 06:16 AM

quote:

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve
as a warning to others.

that is also a good one [img]smile.gif[/img]

Barb · 11-24-2001, 06:23 AM

16. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. Rrolling Oon Tthe Ffloor Llaughing Mmy Aass Ooff

Lifetime · 11-24-2001, 10:14 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Barb:
16. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. Rrolling Oon Tthe Ffloor Llaughing Mmy Aass Ooff

Actually not true. The porno industry happens to be blooming

Just felt like being a wiseguy..

18. Law of Probability Distribution: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed
lol!

11-23-2001, 04:19 PM	#1
John D Harris Ninja Storm Shadow Join Date: March 27, 2001 Location: Northport,Alabama, USA Age: 62 Posts: 3,577	SOME RULES LEFT OUT OF "LIFE'S LITTLE INSTRUCTION BOOK" 1. The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. 2. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. 3. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with. 4. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before. 5. Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check out 3 of your friends. If they're okay, guess what? 6. Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check. 7. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn. 8. It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats. 10. If you are given an open book exam, you will forget your book. 13. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others. 14. You can't fall off the floor. 15. The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think. 16. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. 17. Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can't find them. 18. Law of Probability Distribution: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed. __________________ Crustiest of the OLD COOTS "Donating mirrors for years to help the Liberal/Socialist find their collective rear-ends, because both hands doesn't seem to be working. Veitnam 61-65:KIA 1864 66:KIA 5008 67:KIA 9378 68:KIA 14594 69:KIA 9414 70:KIA 4221 71:KIA 1380 72:KIA 300 Afghanistan2001-2008 KIA 585 2009-2012 KIA 1465 and counting Davros 1 Much abliged Massachusetts

11-23-2001, 04:21 PM	#2
Sir ReGiN Gold Dragon Join Date: August 11, 2001 Location: The land of blonde virgins Age: 42 Posts: 2,563	ROTFLMAO!! [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] __________________ Take a look at your Promised Land<br />Your deed is that gun in your hand

11-23-2001, 05:56 PM	#4
Legolas Jack Burton Join Date: March 31, 2001 Location: The zephyr lands beneath the brine. Age: 39 Posts: 5,459	That was funny [img]smile.gif[/img] But what happened to 11 and 12? __________________ Say NO to the Trouser Tyranny!

11-23-2001, 11:59 PM	#5
Grand-Ranger Galvatron Join Date: March 29, 2001 Location: Everywhere I wanna go its already where I am,cause I am already there Posts: 2,130	7. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn. I liked that one ROFL John D! __________________ <br /><br />So if in the shaddows look behind you, because thats where the ranger will be.

11-24-2001, 06:16 AM	#6
Harkoliar Jack Burton Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Philippines, but now Harbor City Sydney Age: 41 Posts: 5,556	quote: It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others. that is also a good one [img]smile.gif[/img] __________________ Catch me if you can..

11-23-2001, 04:36 PM	#3
Neb Account deleted by Request Join Date: May 17, 2001 Location: . Age: 38 Posts: 8,802	ROFL John D, heheheh "5. Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check out 3 of your friends. If they're okay, guess what?" ROFLMAO!

11-24-2001, 06:23 AM	#7
Barb Symbol of Cyric Join Date: July 16, 2001 Location: England, UK Age: 50 Posts: 1,150	16. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. Rrolling Oon Tthe Ffloor Llaughing Mmy Aass Ooff __________________ [url]\"http://www.xsorbit.com/users2/barb/index.cgi\" target=\"_blank\"></a> <br /><br />[url]\"http://www.xsorbit.com/users2/barb/index.cgi\" target=\"_blank\"><b>The Master of Beasts</b></a>

11-24-2001, 10:14 AM	#8
Lifetime Red Dragon Join Date: March 3, 2001 Location: Scotch College, Melbourne Posts: 1,503	quote: Originally posted by Barb: 16. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. Rrolling Oon Tthe Ffloor Llaughing Mmy Aass Ooff Actually not true. The porno industry happens to be blooming Just felt like being a wiseguy.. 18. Law of Probability Distribution: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed lol! __________________ \'Cause its always raining in my head. Forget all the things I should have said..

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