Still alive, a laugh, got pics?

J.J. · 09-05-2001, 04:08 PM

Hi everybody and newbodies, just thought i would throw this out, I always like to celebrate individual employee excellence and ingenuity in larger corporations, and this fits the bill. HEY< WOLFGIR < Has anyone seen our resident howler? I have some pictures of glacier park he might like, and our cabin in the Rocky Mtns., also, if any of you 'ol timers' want to see them, just send me an e mail, I finally have them all scanned. enjoy

McDonnell Douglas Warranty

This was allegedly posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas Web site by
an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of
course, does not have a sense of humor and made the web department take it
down immediately. For once, the 'IMPORTANT' note at the end is worth a read,
too.

****************

THANK YOU for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to
protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the
warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not
required, but the information will help us to develop new products that
best meet your needs and desires.
*********

Your Title
[_] Mr.
[_] Mrs.
[_] Ms.
[_] Miss
[_] Lt.
[_] Gen.
[_] Comrade
[_] Classified
[_] Other

First Name:.....................
Initial: ....
Last Name: ...................
Password: `(max. 8 char) ``..
Code Name:......................
Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: ............

Which model aircraft did you purchase?
[_] F-14 Tomcat
[_] F-15 Eagle
[_] F-16 Falcon [
[_] F-117A Stealth
[_] Classified

Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): .... /.... /...
Serial Number: .................

Please indicate where this product was purchased:
[_] Received as gift / aid package
[_] Catalogue / showroom
[_] Independent arms broker
[_] Mail order
[_] Discount store
[_] Government surplus
[_] Classified

Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you
have just purchased:
[_] Heard loud noise, looked up
[_] Store display
[_] Espionage
[_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally
[_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
[_] Was attacked by one

Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to
purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
[_] Style / appearance
[_] Speed / maneuverability
[_] Price / value
[_] Comfort / convenience
[_] Kickback / bribe
[_] Recommended by salesperson
[_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
[_] Advanced Weapons Systems
[_] Backroom politics
[_] Negative experience opposing one in combat

Please indicate the location(s)where this product will be used:
[_] North America
[_] Iraq
[_] Iraq
[_] Aircraft carrier
[_] Iraq
[_] Europe
[_] Iraq
[_] Middle East (not Iraq)
[_] Iraq
[_] Africa
[_] Iraq
[_] Asia / Far East
[_] Iraq
[_] Misc. Third World countries
[_] Iraq
[_] Classified
[_] Iraq

Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase
in the near future:
[_] Color TV
[_] VCR
[_] ICBM / Scud missile
[_] Killer Satellite
[_] CD Player
[_] Air-to-Air Missiles
[_] Space Shuttle
[_] Home Computer
[_] Nuclear Weapon

How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that
apply

[_] Communist / Socialist
[_] Terrorist
[_] Crazed
[_] Neutral
[_] Democratic
[_] Dictatorship
[_] Corrupt
[_] Primitive / Tribal
[_] Just peculiar

How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
[_] Deficit spending
[_] Cash
[_] Suitcases of cocaine
[_] Oil revenues
[_] Personal check
[_] Credit card
[_] Ransom money
[_] Traveler's checks
[_] Letter of Marque

Your occupation:
[_] Homemaker
[_] Sales / marketing
[_] Revolutionary
[_] Clerical
[_] Mercenary
[_] Tyrant
[_] Middle management
[_] Eccentric billionaire
[_] Defense Minister / General
[_] Retired
[_] Student
[_] Classified

To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests
and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular
basis:

[_] Golf
[_] Boating / sailing
[_] Sabotage
[_] Running / jogging
[_] Propaganda / misinformation
[_] Destabilization / overthrow
[_] Default on loans
[_] Gardening
[_] Crafts
[_] Black market / smuggling
[_] Collectibles / collections
[_] Watching sports on TV
[_] Wines
[_] Interrogation / torture
[_] Household pets
[_] Crushing rebellions
[_] Espionage / reconnaissance
[_] Fashion clothing
[_] Border disputes
[_] Mutually Assured Destruction

Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers
will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you
better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and
special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and
mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be
registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!

Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to: McDonnell
DOUGLAS CORPORATION Marketing Department Military, Aerospace Division

IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s)
named above and may contain information that is confidential, privileged,
or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of
humor, or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended
recipient, any dissemination, distribution, or copying of this e-mail is not
authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating
social faux pas. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email,
although the poodle next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you.

------------------
Unstinting Gaurdian of Children
Defender of Those Unable To

Kaz · 09-05-2001, 04:17 PM

ROFLROFLROFL!!! That is HILARIOUS!! I DON'T want to know what McDonalds did to that employee!

------------------

I am the great Kazara

250 · 09-05-2001, 04:17 PM

LOL, ROFLMAO!!!

SSJ4Sephiroth · 09-05-2001, 04:37 PM

Bwhahahaha!!! especially liked the end notice... but the rest cracked me up too!

------------------
It's simple. Once the Planet is hurt, it gathers Spirit Energy to heal the injury. The amount of energy gathered depends on the size of the injury...What would happen if there was an injury that threatened the very life of the Planet? Think how much energy would be gathered! Ha, ha, ha. And at the center of that injury, wil be me. All that boundless energy will be mine. By merging with the energy of the Planet, I will be come a new life form, a new existence. Melding with the Planet, I will cease to exist as I am now. Only to be reborn as a 'God' to rule over every living soul.

Super Sephiroth, slayer of the Uber Fluffy, and battle co-ordionator and defender of the HADB clan.

debiler · 09-05-2001, 04:48 PM

LOL

Don´t anyone dare quote this one!

------------------
Calvin the bold - the malt beer lord is in!

Blade · 09-05-2001, 07:39 PM

LOL, ROFLMAO great where can i sign up for this??

------------------
People are born and people die and yeat life goes on without a care.

adam warlock · 09-08-2001, 08:15 AM

LOLOL bumping this up to share!

------------------

get away from my homepage

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09-05-2001, 04:08 PM	#1
J.J. Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Montana, USA Age: 61 Posts: 1,217	Hi everybody and newbodies, just thought i would throw this out, I always like to celebrate individual employee excellence and ingenuity in larger corporations, and this fits the bill. HEY< WOLFGIR < Has anyone seen our resident howler? I have some pictures of glacier park he might like, and our cabin in the Rocky Mtns., also, if any of you 'ol timers' want to see them, just send me an e mail, I finally have them all scanned. enjoy McDonnell Douglas Warranty This was allegedly posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas Web site by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of course, does not have a sense of humor and made the web department take it down immediately. For once, the 'IMPORTANT' note at the end is worth a read, too. ************** THANK YOU for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires. ******* Your Title [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other First Name:..................... Initial: .... Last Name: ................... Password: `(max. 8 char) ``.. Code Name:...................... Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: ............ Which model aircraft did you purchase? [_] F-14 Tomcat [_] F-15 Eagle [_] F-16 Falcon [ [_] F-117A Stealth [_] Classified Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): .... /.... /... Serial Number: ................. Please indicate where this product was purchased: [_] Received as gift / aid package [_] Catalogue / showroom [_] Independent arms broker [_] Mail order [_] Discount store [_] Government surplus [_] Classified Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased: [_] Heard loud noise, looked up [_] Store display [_] Espionage [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer [_] Was attacked by one Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product: [_] Style / appearance [_] Speed / maneuverability [_] Price / value [_] Comfort / convenience [_] Kickback / bribe [_] Recommended by salesperson [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation [_] Advanced Weapons Systems [_] Backroom politics [_] Negative experience opposing one in combat Please indicate the location(s)where this product will be used: [_] North America [_] Iraq [_] Iraq [_] Aircraft carrier [_] Iraq [_] Europe [_] Iraq [_] Middle East (not Iraq) [_] Iraq [_] Africa [_] Iraq [_] Asia / Far East [_] Iraq [_] Misc. Third World countries [_] Iraq [_] Classified [_] Iraq Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future: [_] Color TV [_] VCR [_] ICBM / Scud missile [_] Killer Satellite [_] CD Player [_] Air-to-Air Missiles [_] Space Shuttle [_] Home Computer [_] Nuclear Weapon How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that apply [_] Communist / Socialist [_] Terrorist [_] Crazed [_] Neutral [_] Democratic [_] Dictatorship [_] Corrupt [_] Primitive / Tribal [_] Just peculiar How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product? [_] Deficit spending [_] Cash [_] Suitcases of cocaine [_] Oil revenues [_] Personal check [_] Credit card [_] Ransom money [_] Traveler's checks [_] Letter of Marque Your occupation: [_] Homemaker [_] Sales / marketing [_] Revolutionary [_] Clerical [_] Mercenary [_] Tyrant [_] Middle management [_] Eccentric billionaire [_] Defense Minister / General [_] Retired [_] Student [_] Classified To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis: [_] Golf [_] Boating / sailing [_] Sabotage [_] Running / jogging [_] Propaganda / misinformation [_] Destabilization / overthrow [_] Default on loans [_] Gardening [_] Crafts [_] Black market / smuggling [_] Collectibles / collections [_] Watching sports on TV [_] Wines [_] Interrogation / torture [_] Household pets [_] Crushing rebellions [_] Espionage / reconnaissance [_] Fashion clothing [_] Border disputes [_] Mutually Assured Destruction Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes! Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to: McDonnell DOUGLAS CORPORATION Marketing Department Military, Aerospace Division IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential, privileged, or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor, or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution, or copying of this e-mail is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email, although the poodle next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. ------------------ Unstinting Gaurdian of Children Defender of Those Unable To

09-05-2001, 04:17 PM	#2
Kaz Thoth - Egyptian God of Wisdom Join Date: August 16, 2001 Location: UK Posts: 2,891	ROFLROFLROFL!!! That is HILARIOUS!! I DON'T want to know what McDonalds did to that employee! ------------------ I am the great Kazara

09-05-2001, 04:17 PM	#3
250 Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: March 4, 2001 Location: either CA or MO Age: 43 Posts: 2,674	LOL, ROFLMAO!!!

09-05-2001, 04:37 PM	#4
SSJ4Sephiroth Beholder Join Date: May 4, 2001 Location: The Outside Looking In Age: 38 Posts: 4,361	Bwhahahaha!!! especially liked the end notice... but the rest cracked me up too! ------------------ It's simple. Once the Planet is hurt, it gathers Spirit Energy to heal the injury. The amount of energy gathered depends on the size of the injury...What would happen if there was an injury that threatened the very life of the Planet? Think how much energy would be gathered! Ha, ha, ha. And at the center of that injury, wil be me. All that boundless energy will be mine. By merging with the energy of the Planet, I will be come a new life form, a new existence. Melding with the Planet, I will cease to exist as I am now. Only to be reborn as a 'God' to rule over every living soul. Super Sephiroth, slayer of the Uber Fluffy, and battle co-ordionator and defender of the HADB clan.

09-05-2001, 04:48 PM	#5
debiler Red Wizard of Thay Join Date: May 6, 2001 Location: Stuttgart, Germany Age: 45 Posts: 811	LOL Don´t anyone dare quote this one! ------------------ Calvin the bold - the malt beer lord is in!

09-05-2001, 07:39 PM	#6
Blade Emerald Dragon Join Date: March 12, 2001 Location: spokane wa usa Age: 41 Posts: 926	LOL, ROFLMAO great where can i sign up for this?? ------------------ People are born and people die and yeat life goes on without a care.

09-08-2001, 08:15 AM	#7
adam warlock Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice Join Date: January 7, 2001 Location: I live inside of my mind..... Age: 54 Posts: 3,234	LOLOL bumping this up to share! ------------------ get away from my homepage

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