If Bill Gates Wrote a Book on Wicca.....

[Garnet FalconDance]

(for the pagans and wiccans on IW)

IF BILL GATES WROTE A BOOK ON WICCA...

1) The book would be called Windows to the Goddess

2) Iconology would be a major chapter

3) A revised edition would be released approximately every 6 months, without which your magik would no longer work

4) Your broom would crash at least once a week

5) Cauldrons would be called recycle bins

6) A Book of Shadows would be called a Folder of Magik

7) A free high-speed connection spell would come with every book

8) Every now & then your circle would collapse & you would have to
perform the re-boot ritual to get it working again

9) If you used the more powerful NT Magik, all circles within a 5 mile
radius would go down

10) At least once a month you would have to re-install your spells
into your Folder of Magik

11) You would have to use a start ritual to exit your circle (& cakes
& wine would only be served after a sign from the Goddess that it was safe to do so.)

[Grojlach]

Not much of a wiccan, but some of those made me smile. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Nachtrafe]

ROFL!!!!!!

HEH...I'm using Wicca XP...Tremble in fear...Hey...whaddya mean 'Blue Screen of UnMaking'??? *GRUMBLE GRUMBLE*

[Epona]

Re. no 4 - only once a week?

[img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img]

[Garnet FalconDance]

quote:

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Originally posted by Epona:
Re. no 4 - only once a week?

[img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img]

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::seriously considering the question::

It would depend on whether it were the latest beta XP besom or an older version.....

[DragonMage]

ROTFL!!! OMG!

7, 8 and 9 in particular!

Those are good, hon! [img]smile.gif[/img] Now I'm going to be giggling off and on all day. People at work will think I'm looney...oh wait...they already do. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[Pangur Ban]

ROFLOL !!! [img]graemlins/nicekitty.gif[/img]

Best laugh I've had for a long, long, time ..

Its a shame that the laws of karma don't seem to apply to Microsoft.
Imagine if every time a privately owned PC had a Windows crash, 3 Microsoft computers crashed as well??

[AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe]

Im not a wicker basket or whatever, but those were still funny [img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img] oh yeah and while im here [img]graemlins/bonghit.gif[/img] heehee

[fable]

Cute, Garnet. I've got a good joke about how each Wiccan tradition would respond to the old chicken-crossing-the-road joke, but it's kinda esoteric. So let me add, instead, this one about how each astrological sun sign would respond to the joke about how many people it takes to screw in a lightbulb:

How Many Members of Your Sign Does It Take to Change a Lightbulb?

ARIES: Just one. Wanna make something of it?

TAURUS: Are you absolutely positive that lightbulb is burned out? I hate to throw it away if it still might be useful.

GEMINI: Probably one is best, because if there are more than one, they'll get so wrapped up in talking to each other that they'll forget all about the lightbulb.

CANCER: Only one, but three therapists will be needed to help with the grieving process.

LEO: Leos do not change their own lightbulbs. They find someone else to do it for them.

VIRGO: 1.11111119873, give or take .00000000000013%.

LIBRA: Well, I could do it, unless of course you'd prefer to do it, but you look sort of busy right now. What do you want to do?

SCORPIO: None, because Scorpios aren't afraid of the dark.

SAGITTARIUS: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got the rest of our lives ahead of us and you're worrying about a stupid light bulb?

CAPRICORN: I don't have time for these foolish jokes.

AQUARIUS: Well, you see, energy is really matter and matter is really energy and light is a form of energy but the light bulb is matter, and--

PISCES: What light bulb?

[Nachtrafe]

ROFL!!! Being a Gemini, I am in total agreement of how we would react to the light bulb. Although I *would* be interested in the othe wicca joke. Could you email or PM it to me fable? [img]smile.gif[/img]