I just did a very stupid thing - Page 4

Jorath Calar · 11-29-2001, 03:39 PM

I'd never doubt womans word... specially not yours Mel

Lord of Alcohol · 11-29-2001, 04:22 PM

Well if your nervous the obvious solution is to show up drunk! Try not to be too stumbling drunk though, that tends to turn them off for some reason. Dunno why. Yes more useless advice from the Lord of Alcohol [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Sir Kenyth · 11-29-2001, 05:33 PM

Here's a couple little secrets that an older guy has picked up on. Make your first date a TALKING date. Do something somewhere you can talk. Like dinner and drinks, followed by a scenic walk or drive. Clubs and movies don't really give you a chance to know each other. DO NOT GET DRUNK OR EVEN MILDLY INEBRIATED!!!!! At the same time, don't be scared to have a drink. Just show self-control. Make sure and do a little light touching to make sure she knows you're interested. I don't mean grabbing and pinching now! A light hand on her shoulder or arm while you are seating her. A quick touch on the hand while you are talking during dinner. Occasionally put your hand on her back while you are walking. Keep the talking light mooded. Don't discuss seious things or problems. Act as though you don't have a care in the world. Smile and listen a lot. Ask non-invasive questions about her. Joke a bit if you can.

Finally, the test to determine her interest level in you by the end of the night. Try and give her a kiss goodnight. If she likes you, you will get a kiss back with some passion. If she turns her cheek *OUCH!*, smile and say goodbye instead of goodnight, because this relationship isn't going anywhere.

Ladies, what do you think? Good advice?

Tabitha Silverwill · 11-29-2001, 05:53 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Sir Kenyth:
Make your first date a TALKING date. Do something somewhere you can talk. Like dinner and drinks, followed by a scenic walk or drive. Clubs and movies don't really give you a chance to know each other. DO NOT GET DRUNK OR EVEN MILDLY INEBRIATED!!!!!

Sir Kenyth - you just beat me to it.

I would say that first and foremost, if you like this girl, you will want to find out about her and have her know more about you, therefore... DON'T go to a film, concert, paintballing. Go somewhere quietish but with enough going on so that you can comment if the conversation dries up.

Have a couple of questions lined up to break the ice. Yes, it might be corny but first impressions do count and you don't want to put your foot in your mouth as I tend to when I'm nervous.

Other tips - hold the door open for her and let her go first - it's not sexist, just good manners.

Don't wear gallons of aftershave.

Get a friendly female to approve what you plan to wear.

Make sure she has a means to get back home safely.

Be yourself, start off on the basis which you want to continue on.

One point, I disagree with Kenyth on is the kissing thing. Just because she won't play tonsil hockey on the first date doesn't mean she isn't attracted to you or deserves the cold shoulder. Sometimes, I've snogged on the first date, sometimes I haven't. Depends on her confidence, hormones, wind direction, mood, weather, etc. If you like her and it goes well, call her the next day. Women like being pursued - it's good for our egos [img]tongue.gif[/img]

And finally, enjoy yourself, it's meant to be fun you know. If she isn't everything you hoped for then at least you had some good experience and a pleasant evening

Good luck [img]smile.gif[/img]

Sir Kenyth · 11-29-2001, 06:20 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Tabitha Silverwill:

Sir Kenyth - you just beat me to it.

One point, I disagree with Kenyth on is the kissing thing. Just because she won't play tonsil hockey on the first date doesn't mean she isn't attracted to you or deserves the cold shoulder. Sometimes, I've snogged on the first date, sometimes I haven't. Depends on her confidence, hormones, wind direction, mood, weather, etc. If you like her and it goes well, call her the next day. Women like being pursued - it's good for our egos [img]tongue.gif[/img]

And finally, enjoy yourself, it's meant to be fun you know. If she isn't everything you hoped for then at least you had some good experience and a pleasant evening

Good luck [img]smile.gif[/img]

You misunderstand! I don't mean tonsil hockey or making out. I mean a nice kiss on the lips to end the evening. If you are truly interested in the guy, you won't deny him a little smooch before parting. I'll bet the dates you "snogged" on were the one's where you REALLY liked the guy you had a date with. As a guy, I think I deserve an interest level from my date about as high as mine in her. If my date has a flagging interest level in me, she will likely date me just long enough to find a guy who interests her more. It's a tricky thing, sniffing out dead ends before investing too much hope in them. Tell me, if a guy refused a smooch from you, what would you think?

250 · 11-29-2001, 06:30 PM

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Dragonmage!!!!!
what you talking about? I was just kidding! geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesh, I know you said that because you dont really know whats going on in my life, but me and Gina love each other very much, alright? she is pretty right by my judgement

Tabitha Silverwill · 11-29-2001, 06:32 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Sir Kenyth:

I'll bet the dates you "snogged" on were the one's where you REALLY liked the guy you had a date with. As a guy, I think I deserve an interest level from my date about as high as mine in her. If my date has a flagging interest level in me, she will likely date me just long enough to find a guy who interests her more. It's a tricky thing, sniffing out dead ends before investing too much hope in them. Tell me, if a guy refused a smooch from you, what would you think?

My current partner had to wait for the third date before we snogged [img]smile.gif[/img] I'm worth waiting for [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] In actual fact, the reason for it was curiousity, self defence, shyness and not reading each other's signals properly. I was very interested but have matured (grand old age of 29 you see) which means that the other person's personality and attitude need sussing out before I give any ambiguous signals, like kissing. He got a kiss on the cheek, twice - he was blooming honoured

I agree that if 2 19 year olds go on a date and liked each other, it would be unusual for them not to have kissed by the end.

In response to your last question, as a slightly world worn OAP, I wouldn't attempt to "smooch" a man unless I was sure that my advances wouldn't be spurned - the self defence thing again, you see. Rejection hurts so one avoids situations that are more likely to lead to it. Probably sound awfully repressed but it was a very tough first half of year as far as relationships go.

signe · 11-30-2001, 02:40 AM

quote:
Originally posted by 250:
dont EVER try to be yourself

instead, try to be someone else. that makes you less nerveous. when you get laid, then you can go back to your normal self...

ok just kidding about the later part. just be someone else, that is my advice. I am tired and sick of hearing "be yourself" instead, try to focus on something less serious, light hearted stuff. after all, successfully being someone else is part of yourself [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Excellent answer! Be someone completely different. When I daydream, I NEVER daydream about being me. If I did, I might as well just go do the laundry. Be a spy... or an archeologist like Indiana Jones... or a Mason. Or you could be me and go vacuum the lounge.

Jorath Calar · 11-30-2001, 08:12 AM

Thanks Kenyth and Tabitha. Both Excelent advices.
This girl is everything I hoped for...(well what I know of her so far) My concern is...(or was, I'm kinda past that now) wether I'm anything she hopes for.

It's only 8 hours now till I see her, I'll tell you how it went tomorrow [img]smile.gif[/img]

Epona · 11-30-2001, 08:22 AM

quote:
Originally posted by MagiK:

Ohh my Epona too bad you aren't older and available..

Wow, that's a compliment... at least I can count my grey hairs on one hand still (I'm 30). I'm not available though

11-29-2001, 04:22 PM	#32
Lord of Alcohol Xanathar Thieves Guild Join Date: January 8, 2001 Location: Charlotte,NC Age: 60 Posts: 4,570	Well if your nervous the obvious solution is to show up drunk! Try not to be too stumbling drunk though, that tends to turn them off for some reason. Dunno why. Yes more useless advice from the Lord of Alcohol [img]tongue.gif[/img] __________________ No

11-29-2001, 05:33 PM	#33
Sir Kenyth Fzoul Chembryl Join Date: August 30, 2001 Location: somewhere Age: 54 Posts: 1,785	Here's a couple little secrets that an older guy has picked up on. Make your first date a TALKING date. Do something somewhere you can talk. Like dinner and drinks, followed by a scenic walk or drive. Clubs and movies don't really give you a chance to know each other. DO NOT GET DRUNK OR EVEN MILDLY INEBRIATED!!!!! At the same time, don't be scared to have a drink. Just show self-control. Make sure and do a little light touching to make sure she knows you're interested. I don't mean grabbing and pinching now! A light hand on her shoulder or arm while you are seating her. A quick touch on the hand while you are talking during dinner. Occasionally put your hand on her back while you are walking. Keep the talking light mooded. Don't discuss seious things or problems. Act as though you don't have a care in the world. Smile and listen a lot. Ask non-invasive questions about her. Joke a bit if you can. Finally, the test to determine her interest level in you by the end of the night. Try and give her a kiss goodnight. If she likes you, you will get a kiss back with some passion. If she turns her cheek OUCH!, smile and say goodbye instead of goodnight, because this relationship isn't going anywhere. Ladies, what do you think? Good advice? __________________ Master Barbsman and wielder of the razor wit!<br /><br />There are dark angels among us. They present themselves in shining raiment but there is, in their hearts, the blackness of the abyss.

11-29-2001, 05:53 PM	#34
Tabitha Silverwill Dungeon Master Join Date: August 11, 2001 Location: United Kingdom Posts: 91	quote: Originally posted by Sir Kenyth: Make your first date a TALKING date. Do something somewhere you can talk. Like dinner and drinks, followed by a scenic walk or drive. Clubs and movies don't really give you a chance to know each other. DO NOT GET DRUNK OR EVEN MILDLY INEBRIATED!!!!! Sir Kenyth - you just beat me to it. I would say that first and foremost, if you like this girl, you will want to find out about her and have her know more about you, therefore... DON'T go to a film, concert, paintballing. Go somewhere quietish but with enough going on so that you can comment if the conversation dries up. Have a couple of questions lined up to break the ice. Yes, it might be corny but first impressions do count and you don't want to put your foot in your mouth as I tend to when I'm nervous. Other tips - hold the door open for her and let her go first - it's not sexist, just good manners. Don't wear gallons of aftershave. Get a friendly female to approve what you plan to wear. Make sure she has a means to get back home safely. Be yourself, start off on the basis which you want to continue on. One point, I disagree with Kenyth on is the kissing thing. Just because she won't play tonsil hockey on the first date doesn't mean she isn't attracted to you or deserves the cold shoulder. Sometimes, I've snogged on the first date, sometimes I haven't. Depends on her confidence, hormones, wind direction, mood, weather, etc. If you like her and it goes well, call her the next day. Women like being pursued - it's good for our egos [img]tongue.gif[/img] And finally, enjoy yourself, it's meant to be fun you know. If she isn't everything you hoped for then at least you had some good experience and a pleasant evening Good luck [img]smile.gif[/img] __________________ <p>Regret nothing.

11-29-2001, 06:20 PM	#35
Sir Kenyth Fzoul Chembryl Join Date: August 30, 2001 Location: somewhere Age: 54 Posts: 1,785	quote: Originally posted by Tabitha Silverwill: Sir Kenyth - you just beat me to it. One point, I disagree with Kenyth on is the kissing thing. Just because she won't play tonsil hockey on the first date doesn't mean she isn't attracted to you or deserves the cold shoulder. Sometimes, I've snogged on the first date, sometimes I haven't. Depends on her confidence, hormones, wind direction, mood, weather, etc. If you like her and it goes well, call her the next day. Women like being pursued - it's good for our egos [img]tongue.gif[/img] And finally, enjoy yourself, it's meant to be fun you know. If she isn't everything you hoped for then at least you had some good experience and a pleasant evening Good luck [img]smile.gif[/img] You misunderstand! I don't mean tonsil hockey or making out. I mean a nice kiss on the lips to end the evening. If you are truly interested in the guy, you won't deny him a little smooch before parting. I'll bet the dates you "snogged" on were the one's where you REALLY liked the guy you had a date with. As a guy, I think I deserve an interest level from my date about as high as mine in her. If my date has a flagging interest level in me, she will likely date me just long enough to find a guy who interests her more. It's a tricky thing, sniffing out dead ends before investing too much hope in them. Tell me, if a guy refused a smooch from you, what would you think? __________________ Master Barbsman and wielder of the razor wit!<br /><br />There are dark angels among us. They present themselves in shining raiment but there is, in their hearts, the blackness of the abyss.

11-29-2001, 06:32 PM	#37
Tabitha Silverwill Dungeon Master Join Date: August 11, 2001 Location: United Kingdom Posts: 91	quote: Originally posted by Sir Kenyth: I'll bet the dates you "snogged" on were the one's where you REALLY liked the guy you had a date with. As a guy, I think I deserve an interest level from my date about as high as mine in her. If my date has a flagging interest level in me, she will likely date me just long enough to find a guy who interests her more. It's a tricky thing, sniffing out dead ends before investing too much hope in them. Tell me, if a guy refused a smooch from you, what would you think? My current partner had to wait for the third date before we snogged [img]smile.gif[/img] I'm worth waiting for [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] In actual fact, the reason for it was curiousity, self defence, shyness and not reading each other's signals properly. I was very interested but have matured (grand old age of 29 you see) which means that the other person's personality and attitude need sussing out before I give any ambiguous signals, like kissing. He got a kiss on the cheek, twice - he was blooming honoured I agree that if 2 19 year olds go on a date and liked each other, it would be unusual for them not to have kissed by the end. In response to your last question, as a slightly world worn OAP, I wouldn't attempt to "smooch" a man unless I was sure that my advances wouldn't be spurned - the self defence thing again, you see. Rejection hurts so one avoids situations that are more likely to lead to it. Probably sound awfully repressed but it was a very tough first half of year as far as relationships go. __________________ <p>Regret nothing.

11-29-2001, 03:39 PM	#31
Jorath Calar Harper Join Date: October 6, 2001 Location: Iceland Posts: 4,706	I'd never doubt womans word... specially not yours Mel

11-29-2001, 06:30 PM	#36
250 Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: March 4, 2001 Location: either CA or MO Age: 42 Posts: 2,674	GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Dragonmage!!!!! what you talking about? I was just kidding! geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesh, I know you said that because you dont really know whats going on in my life, but me and Gina love each other very much, alright? she is pretty right by my judgement

11-30-2001, 02:40 AM	#38
signe Elite Waterdeep Guard Join Date: November 27, 2001 Location: Pennsylvania, US /Hampshire, Uk, here or there... Posts: 7	quote: Originally posted by 250: dont EVER try to be yourself instead, try to be someone else. that makes you less nerveous. when you get laid, then you can go back to your normal self... ok just kidding about the later part. just be someone else, that is my advice. I am tired and sick of hearing "be yourself" instead, try to focus on something less serious, light hearted stuff. after all, successfully being someone else is part of yourself [img]tongue.gif[/img] Excellent answer! Be someone completely different. When I daydream, I NEVER daydream about being me. If I did, I might as well just go do the laundry. Be a spy... or an archeologist like Indiana Jones... or a Mason. Or you could be me and go vacuum the lounge.

11-30-2001, 08:12 AM	#39
Jorath Calar Harper Join Date: October 6, 2001 Location: Iceland Posts: 4,706	Thanks Kenyth and Tabitha. Both Excelent advices. This girl is everything I hoped for...(well what I know of her so far) My concern is...(or was, I'm kinda past that now) wether I'm anything she hopes for. It's only 8 hours now till I see her, I'll tell you how it went tomorrow [img]smile.gif[/img]

11-30-2001, 08:22 AM	#40
Epona Zartan Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: London, England Age: 53 Posts: 5,164	quote: Originally posted by MagiK: Ohh my Epona too bad you aren't older and available.. Wow, that's a compliment... at least I can count my grey hairs on one hand still (I'm 30). I'm not available though __________________ [img]\"http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/epona.gif\" alt=\" - \" />

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