Complicated.... buying a car

[Intrepid]

I really want to buy a car that is being sold in front of a neighbour's house, but the thing is my friend also wants it.
What should i do?
How do we decide who should buy the car, preferably without a bidding war, or contact with the seller, we are pretty good friends, but i think the friendship would majorly suffer if either of us bought it without organsing something, or coming to some kind of decision about it first.
I really want that car, it would be my first car, and it would be his first also, so i am not sure.
The car is exactly, if not better than what i am looking for, well within my price range, manual 5 speed, registered etc, and i really just like it. But he lives outish of town, and maybe he would need the car more than me.
Anyway my main concern is damaging the friendship, second is pushing the price up.
any advice appreciated

[ 07-28-2004, 11:05 AM: Message edited by: Intrepid ]

[Bokken]

I can't answer the question for you but I can tell you what I would do.

If I was in that situation I would sit down with my friend over a coffee or meal and talk about the vehicle. Firstly let him know that I am also interested in it and try to figure out who needs it more. I'd also keep in mind that although you or he may need it more, it will sadden the other more should one of you purchase it. Sometimes, even though we may need something regardless of how much, it will not affect us as much if we do not get it. However to certain people, even if they do not need something as much, it can have a huge effect on them if they do not get it.
Personally, I have very few friends and make more friends rarely. By this, I make sure that my friends are as real a friend as I can possibly have. I can discuss anything with them and we never argue or feel ill about each other. A disagreement may lead to a happy debate but we will come to a solution even if we must agree to disagree. At the end of the day, there are plenty of cars to be bought, yet good friends rarely come by.

It is somewhat like when two friends are both attracted to the same girl. Who exactly is worth her affection more? Does one love more than the other? Does one hurt more than the other? In this case, good friends will both stay away as it will affect both regardless of the victor. The case with a car is different, but at the end of the day, if no solution can be found, leave it and wait for another to come along. As much of a sacrifice as it may be, you may just thank yourself for it in the future.

Just my opinion anyway. The hard part is up to you!

[Aerich]

Make sure you look around in the papers and also get the word out to family and friends that you are in the market for a car. Tell them what make/model/features you'd prefer to have.

If it was me, I'd let your friend get it. The friend is worth more than the car, and cars abound. Friends don't.

I'd also second Bokken's post. It would probably help if you two sat down and talked it over. Maybe one of you gets it and also promises to help the other to look for a similar car.

[quietman1920]

Intrepid, I won't say I know your pain. I can't know your pain...I can only hope that your friendship will survive it. Bokken has given you Tremendously Sage advice. Please Heed It.

That said, not all cars with 'For Sale' signs in front of houses are for sale by owner. There are certain unscupulous individuals who seek to circumvent the dealership licensing laws and the protections that they provide consumers. This is called "Curbstoning".

Here is a website about 'curbstoning':

http://www.curbstoppers.com/

20/20 some years back had an expose where curbstoners were found to have turned back odometers and to have even bought totalled cars, rebuilding them minimally, repainting them, and selling them as new. The one on ther show had been totlled for being under water for days in a flood...but the person selling the car didn't mention a thing about it.

[Ronn_Bman]

My wife and I faced a similar situation with her sister over a house. My wife found out about the house while helping her sister look for a home, and took her sister to look at it. Her sister loved it and wanted to buy it. Unfortunately, my wife also fell in love with it.

Our situation was simplified by the fact that her sister couldn't come up with the down payment. Our purchase of the home left her sister a bit green for a couple of days, but it was a friendly shade of green with no permanent damage done.

If she had actually come up with the money, we would have let her have it, and the green would have been the other way around.

It would seem to me that if both you and your friend are financially able to buy the vehicle, then I'd say whoever found the car first has dibbs.

[Intrepid]

Yes, i'm going to let it go.
Bokken's advice was great, and thankyou everyone else also, in fact the friend has already pointed out another car, which i am strongly thinking of buying, anyway i'll take it for a test drive tomorrow etc.
Thanks again

[Rikard T'Aranaxz]

I dont really agree with Bokken's comparisment with 2 friends liking the same girl, because what i always do is let the girl decide (i actually had this once with a friend of mine... the girl chose me )

[Lady Sedai]

Also to protect yourself from "unscrupulous deals", you AND your friend should get the VIN numbers off any car you are considering buying and have them checked against any reported wrecks or other major vehicular flaws (such as recalls put out by the manufacturer).

You can usually use the VIN alone online to check out the specific car. If you cannot find anything that way, contact a good insurance company. You both need to check insurance quotes anyway to make sure that, once you have purchased the car, you can afford the insurance on that car and the insurance company can look the vehicle up and give you information on all the features the car should have and, usually, whether or not there has ever been a reported wreck involving the car.

Also...when taking it for a test drive, make sure to drive it a fair distance and then park somewhere where there is nothing on the ground, let it sit for about 30 minutes, then move the car to see if it's leaking any fluids.

While driving, make sure the radio is off and *listen* to the car. Does it make ANY noises in the engine or when shifting gears? Does is "shimmy" or shake when driving (indicating everything from bad tires, an alignment needed to transmission problems).

Turn on the vent (but not the A/C) and *smell* for any "odd" odors coming through the vent which could indicate an oil or radiator leak.

Look at the radiator hoses under the hood to make sure they are not "dry rotting" and needing replacement, check the battery cables for wear or corrosion, look at the engine block and manifold to see if it looks like either has any sort of build up of dirt and fluids (usually indicating an oil leak which could mean any number of things).

When it's at rest and safe to do so, check all the fluids...radiator, oil, brake, transmission.

Make sure all the lights work, A/C (if equipped), windshield wipers, and any other "extras" like radio/CD player, etc.

Crawl underneath the car and check out the muffler also. Is it rusted? Does it have any holes in it? Are all the clamps holding it in place?

Anyway...this is from much experience in buying used cars. Hope this helps. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Intrepid]

wow, that is very helpfull Lady Sedai,
I was planning on taking it to a mechanic, and also my friend will look it over, so it should be pretty good, i might drive it a bit hard to test it, and i'll go for a longish drive to.
thankyou for the advice