07-06-2001, 05:09 PM | #21 | |
Knight of the Rose
Join Date: January 8, 2001
Location: Scotland
Age: 38
Posts: 4,418
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Quote:
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07-06-2001, 05:44 PM | #22 |
Red Dragon
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Cologne, North Rhine-Westphalia, Germany
Age: 52
Posts: 1,517
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1/What famous world renouned scottish poet was born in 1759? - this must be a trick question as it is a wellknown fact that all Scots are illiterate. 2/Whats the name of the well known structure erected in Glasgow that looks like the an armadillo? -Macarmadillo 3/What has been placed on top of a statue in Glasgow which is now a tourist attraction? - a giant umbrella, to prevent the rain from slowly washing the statue away, so that the Scots won't have to spend the money for a replica - in 10.000 years or so. Very provident people, these Scots ! 4/What is traditionally eaten in Scotland on the 25th January? - McNuggets 5/Who played William Wallace in the film Braveheart? - well, I can only recall the initials right now, M.G., ... wait ... Mel... I got it: Melanie Griffith ! 6/Which famous Scottish king led Scotland to freedom? - none, after all Scotland is still under English tyranny. 7/If you lived in Glasgow what is a 44D? - A, uh, well-endowed woman 8/Which Scottish hooker recently was dropped from the British Lions squad despite playing 6 mins against the Wallabies in the first test? - A hooker ? Played for 6 minutes ? With Wallabies ? Yuck ! It seems the Scots have invented the sodomitic quickie ... 9/Where in Scotland did Golf originate from? - Greenwell 10/Where in Scotland do the smallest variety of pony come from? - The stables of the Royal Scottish Cavalry in Edinborough - they were sold to them by the Japanese as especially "fuel-efficient". 11/Which famous english king said "the problem with Scotland is that it is full of Scots!"? - A very wise one 12/Which Scottish Clan were the only army in Europe to defeat the Romans? - Well, see, this a perfect example for how popular legends tend to present a rather distorted picture of the actual historic events. Here is how things REALLY happened: The O'Donnell clan was hiding out in the Scottish highlands from the approaching 31st Roman Legion - scared to death and paralyzed with fear. From their hideout they watched the Romans setting up their camp. Once again they were deeply impressed with how well organised and technologically advanced the Roman army was. The legionaries had almost completed their work, the whole camp except for the luxurious tent of their commander had been set up, when it started to rain again - for the 34th time that week and the 119th time that month ! And not lightly, no it was raining cats and dogs. Upon seeing that the Roman commander, Brutus Gaius Septimus; cursed and ordered the work to stop. He had all his men assemble in front of his only half-set-up tent and spoke to them: "Well guys, that is it, I have finally had it ! What am I, what are you doing here ? Chasing and slaughtering one bunch of stinking Celts after the other - and getting soaking wet in the process. Instead we should be in Rome, enjoying the sun, the vine and chasing around the lovely Roman girls. From now on we are on strike. Tomorrow we shall start marshing back to Londinum and once there we shall demand to be transferred back to Italy immediately." The enormous roar of the cheers of the 5000 legionaries could be heard for miles on that highland plateau - and sent shivers down the spines of the poor Scots - who, as they did not know any Latin, had not understood a word of what the Roman commander had said. Thus, when the Scots rose the next day at noon - they had that really nasty habit of oversleeping as a result of their other nasty habit of drinking way too much - they first could not believe what they were seeing, or rather not seeing: the whole Roman camp was gone. Angus O'Donnell was the first to overcome the surprise, he turned to his brother Sean and said: "We, ..., we have scared them off, we have driven them away !" Then the entire clan ran for the next pub to bring their alcohol level back to normal and to relate the story of their "victory" over the Romans ... 13/Which Scottish mountain is the highest in Britain? - You call those mountains ? I'd rather say hills. 14/What do you call a mountain in Scotland that is over 300 feet high? - a bump 15/Name the town in Scotland that is associated with breathing? - AerO'puerto ------------------ So long ! R³ - proud to be the official spokesman for the most noble Lady Bilqis, Desert Rose of Ironworks Btw, the cow is queuing in the slaughterhouse right now ! |
07-06-2001, 06:12 PM | #23 |
Knight of the Rose
Join Date: January 8, 2001
Location: Scotland
Age: 38
Posts: 4,418
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Strangley not far off on some of em'.....
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07-06-2001, 06:21 PM | #24 |
Zartan
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: London, England
Age: 53
Posts: 5,164
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No. 10: is a trick question. The smallest pony native to the British Isles is the Shetland Pony, from the Shetland Islands. The smallest breed of pony in the world is the Argentinian Falabella which beats the Shetland by several hands, being about the size of a medium to large dog.
No. 4: I am glad that someone got the full dish - Haggis Neeps and Tatties (Translation: Stomach stuffed with meat/offal and oatmeal served with swede and potato). I don't eat it, but only because I'm vegetarian, I remember enjoying it when I was younger though. ------------------ Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. Epona of The Laughing Hyenas |
07-06-2001, 06:49 PM | #25 |
Zhentarim Guard
Join Date: May 22, 2001
Location: Scotland
Posts: 360
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What the hell happened to my post on International Anti-Spam Association!!!!!
What the blank space for!!! ------------------ Head of the International Anti-Spam Association |
07-06-2001, 06:55 PM | #26 |
Knight of the Rose
Join Date: January 8, 2001
Location: Scotland
Age: 38
Posts: 4,418
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i'm not sure....i thought my machine was f**ked for a minute there
Re-post it if it's not showing up. ------------------ |
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