06-20-2002, 06:57 PM | #21 | |
Banned User
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: VT, USA
Age: 63
Posts: 3,097
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Quote:
A dog will always love you, no matter what. They know how to be a good friend. Mark |
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06-20-2002, 07:16 PM | #22 |
Galvatron
Join Date: January 22, 2002
Location: california wine country
Age: 60
Posts: 2,193
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DOGS VS. CATS
EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY Day number 180 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE! 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 1:00 pm OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE! 4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE! Day number 181 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE! 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 1:00 pm OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE! 4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE! Day number 182 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE! 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 1:00 pm OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE! 1:30 pm - ooooooo. bath. bummer. 4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE! EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed. DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan. DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth. DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer.." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time... And just remember, Dogs have owners and Cats have staff
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“This is an impressive crowd, the haves and the have mores. <br />Some people call you the elite. <br />I call you my base.”<br />~ George W. Bush (2000) |
06-20-2002, 07:39 PM | #23 |
Ironworks Atomic Moderator
Join Date: January 7, 2001
Location: Virginia, U.S.A.
Age: 57
Posts: 9,005
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I don't hate any animals. They are all creatures trying to survive in the world of Humans. Cats are much like humans in that they have their own personalities, some don't "kiss butt", just like some of us humans don't either.
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06-20-2002, 07:40 PM | #24 | |
Hathor
Join Date: October 11, 2001
Location: At My Computer
Age: 43
Posts: 2,217
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Quote:
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Now the swinging bridge<br />Is quieted with creepers. . . <br />Like our tendrilled life. -Basho |
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06-20-2002, 07:43 PM | #25 |
Drow Warrior
Join Date: January 7, 2001
Location: Waynesboro, VA, USA
Posts: 255
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Ha ha! Love that diary!
I'm a cat lover, so don't come to my house if you're allergic or don't like them. I tolerate dogs, and have fondness for the individuals, but agree that they're a bit smelly and slobbery. I might feel differently about different breeds, or if it was my own. I'm not much fond of most birds, other than to look at, but I'm sure as heck not going to hunt one down. Now spiders, on the other hand... eeeek! splat!!! |
06-20-2002, 07:44 PM | #26 | |
20th Level Warrior
Join Date: September 6, 2001
Location: The lighter side of life, a.k.a. Newnan, Georgia
Age: 55
Posts: 2,767
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Quote:
Oh yeah: and "hi!" Long time no see! *hugs* And one more thing: to Azrael - as to a cat "not listening to you", I was once told a funny about that. A dog jumps to your command. A cat takes a message and gets back to you later. [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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[img]\"http://home.earthlink.net/~moraine_sedai/_uimages/dragonmage.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> [img]\"ubb/noncgi/smiles/hero2.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> <br />Alureth...Dragon friend of Lady Breanna<br /><br />Co-Owner/Operator of the Evil Petting Zoo and devout member of the HADB clan.<br />Commander of the Dragon Fleet, IW Peacekeeping Force<br />Mother Hen of IW and Mage extraordinaire.<br /><br />Utterly in love with my soul mate, Hiram. |
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06-20-2002, 08:04 PM | #27 |
Hathor
Join Date: October 11, 2001
Location: At My Computer
Age: 43
Posts: 2,217
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See thats another reason I dont like cats when i talk to them i can tell they understand, but they just don't listen, thats not a good pet in my opinion.
__________________
Now the swinging bridge<br />Is quieted with creepers. . . <br />Like our tendrilled life. -Basho |
06-20-2002, 08:06 PM | #28 |
Banned User
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: VT, USA
Age: 63
Posts: 3,097
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WoW DragonMage!
It's been so long since I've seen you here, I thought you we're gone forever. Course, I guess I'm not here as much as I was last Fall. I've missed you lots! Hugs Breanna! [img]smile.gif[/img] Mark |
06-20-2002, 08:08 PM | #29 |
Banned User
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: VT, USA
Age: 63
Posts: 3,097
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Oh DM!
My family had a cat when I was growing up! Her name was Sassy and we loved her too. I did say I like housecats. I just don't like the bird killing ones outside in my yard! Mark |
06-20-2002, 09:02 PM | #30 | |
Ironworks Moderator
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
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"Don't take life for granted." Animal (may he rest in peace) |
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