Kidman is Smokin'

[Stormymystic]

I was about to agree with you guys, until I turned around, you want to know what I saw? my 2 year was pretending she was smoking a cig, and all I can say is that we as parents are to blame for it, I never thought about it before, my kids would never smoke, but they see someone they look up to smoking, they will think it is ok and do it themselves, this shold not be a blame thread, most people know smoking is bad and nasty, I know it, but do not know how to quit, I have tried many times before and it goes beyond a simple put it down thing, I pick it up with out even thinking about it, if everyone is so bent on banning smoking, or getting pissed at movie stars who smoke,why not first look in the mirror and see what you do that is wrong, bad for you, or other people deem nasty and disgusting? will I quit smoking? I want to, and know I need to, but I do not really have the desire to quit, smoking is te one thing that has been Constant in my life, I started smoking when I was 11, and am now 27, If trully want to end smoking, start with being a friend, not an enemy, words are mightier than a sword, support your friends and help them quit if that is what they trully want to do, if not back off, all you will do is piss them off, and push them away, so chances of them quitting are slim to none...with that said...why does everyone have to find something negitive about another person and dwell on it????????

[Barry the Sprout]

I'm in broad agreement with the concensus here - she can live her life how she wants to as far as I'm concerned. However, I do think that as a society we are extremely selective in our application of this principle.

Smoking is quite socially acceptable when all is said and done. There may be people who will disagree with that and claim it is being driven out of popular culture. I think, personally, that thats just hysteria frankly. Smoking remains pretty much the epitome of cool in some circles, film noir directors for a start... But on a more serious note, what about celebrities who get tattoos or extravagant piercings? Are they also treated as if its their body and they can do what they want with it? How about Marilyn Manson? I strongly doubt that he has escaped criticism for the way he looks and acts. He has been most strongly attacked for being a bad influence to children - either we should let people do what they want (fame or not) or we should restrict them. I don't think ambiguity is a good thing here.

And just to clarify - I'm not a fan of his, but the example seemed pertinant so I added it.

[Timber Loftis]

Originally posted by Barry the Sprout: How about Marilyn Manson? I strongly doubt that he has escaped criticism for the way he looks and acts. He has been most strongly attacked for being a bad influence to children - either we should let people do what they want (fame or not) or we should restrict them. I don't think ambiguity is a good thing here.

Well, I am a fan of his. Or, at least I like some of his music. I'm also a fan of this guy, who has a very relevant point here:
_______________________
When A Dude's Gettin Bullied And Shoots Up His School
And They Blame It On Marilyn - And The Heroin
Where Were The Parents At? - And Look Where It's At
Middle America, Now It's A Tragedy
Now It's So Sad To See An Upper Class Ci-Ty
Havin This Happenin
Then Attack Eminem Cause I Rap This Way Rap This Way
But I'm Glad Cause They Feed Me The Fuel That I Need For The Fire
To Burn And It's Burnin And I Have Returned

-- Slim Shady

[Timber Loftis]

Whooops, found another. Song called....

ROLE MODEL (excerpts)
___________________________
Follow Me And Do Exactly What The Song Says
Smoke Weed Take Pills Drop Outta School Kill People And Drink
And Jump Behind The Wheel Like It Was Still Legal
I'm Dumb Enough To Walk In A Store And Steal
So I'm Dumb Enough To Ask For A Date With Lauryn Hill
Some People Only See That I'm White Ignorin Skill
Cause I Stand Out Like A Green Hat With A Orange Bill
But I Don't Get Pissed Y'all Don't Even See Through The Mist
How The F--- Can I Be White I Don't Even Exist
I Get A Clean Shave Bathe Go To A Rave
Die From An Overdose And Dig Myself Up Out Of My Grave
My Middle Finger Won't Go Down How Do I Wave
And This Is How I'm Supposed To Teach Kids How To Behave

Now Follow Me And Do Exactly What You See
Don't You Wanna Grow Up To Be Just Like Me
I Slap Women And Eat Shrooms Then O D
Now Don't You Wanna Grow Up To Be Just Like Me

-- Eminem again
_________________________________________

Apparently some of these famous "role models" think the idear is a dumb as some of us do.

Personally, I would feel the responsibility if I were famous. But, that speculation is easier to do on this side of the silver screen.

Stormy -- that was a craaaazy wake-up call you had. I remember being young a loving to "smoke" candy and gum cigarettes. Now, talk about teaching kids behavior. Wonder what ever happened to candy cigarettes. [img]graemlins/1ponder.gif[/img]

[Cloudbringer]

Sorry, Barry, I don't know what you're smoking but there's no way 'smoking is the epitome of cool' in any circle that I have access to!

In fact the few family and friends I have who still smoke are trying to quit the 'habit' as they put it. Dunno why an expensive, smelly habit that turns one's teeth and ceilings yellow and threatens one's health would be the epitome of cool!

Waaaaaaaaah....I guess by not hanging out in smoke-filled bars and wheezing up a lung over the last 20 years I've missed being cool? Say it ain't so!

HAHAHA! I'll be uncool then, it's cheaper, my clothes don't smell like smoke and I kinda like breathing!

[Stormymystic]

we still have the candy cigs here if you know where to look for them, I remember my father always bought those for us...hmmm no wonder my family life has been messed up, parents drunk all the time, smoked 3 packs a day a peice, time to re-evaluate my idea of being a good mother...........anyone have a clue on free stop smoking programs?

[robertthebard]

Hey Stormy, they have a 12 step program for that, base on the AA program. Don't know anything about how to find it, but maybe there's a self help website in your area?

[ElricMorlockin]

Originally posted by Cloudbringer: Sorry, Barry, I don't know what you're smoking but there's no way 'smoking is the epitome of cool' in any circle that I have access to!

Welp I happen to be with TL on this one, other than calling Yorick names (but hey give me some time! [img]graemlins/laugh2.gif[/img] ) Just kidding No! Dont go blowing a spark plug or anything unhealthful.
When I started to smoke, I suppose that was one of the reasons? Hell the memory "aint" as good as it used to be ya know! [img]graemlins/blueblink.gif[/img] Now I do it, 'cause I enjoy it (between chokes, gasps and hacks that is! [img]tongue.gif[/img]

In fact the few family and friends I have who still smoke are trying to quit the 'habit' as they put it.

Yeah I hear that one! If I quit smoking that means I gotta quit drinking too! What the hell fun would life be then?

Dunno why an expensive, smelly habit that turns one's teeth and ceilings yellow and threatens one's health would be the epitome of cool!

Are we talking about smoking, or about painting? I happen to think painting is pretty cool (provided that I "aint" the one that has to do the painting!

Waaaaaaaaah....I guess by not hanging out in smoke-filled bars and wheezing up a lung over the last 20 years I've missed being cool? Say it ain't so!

Not too worry you *still* have time yet! Its a very posh thing now-a-days for the lil chicketies to hang out at cigar bars while sipping down a Cognac! [img]graemlins/showoff.gif[/img] So you see? There *is* still time left to be cool! (Note that is not the same as being cold, as in the cold-a$$ed climate ya'll have in upper NY state! [img]graemlins/wow.gif[/img] )

HAHAHA! I'll be uncool then, it's cheaper, my clothes don't smell like smoke and I kinda like breathing!

Breathing is highly overrated dontcha know?

PS- Did I mention that I agree with Timber Loftis on the subject?

[Yorick]

Timber/Magik,

It seems you are confusing "legal obligation" with "moral obligation" and also seeing influence as preclusive from individual choice. Of course a young woman that takes up smoking chooses of her own volition to do so. I never suggested otherwise. However it is also true that she can and is influenced by others. Smoking is not innate in human nature. It is seen, considered, learned, and applied behaviour. Monkey see monkey do.

A person who has influence over others has a responsibility. That's an inescapable fact. The person can ignore, rebel against or abuse that influence, and behave as though there is no consequence to others, or they can accept what comes with fame, and accept the reality that part of their person becomes public property. You disagree with that reality, seemingly in denial.

Have you ever bared your soul in public? Ever had your image or personality or creations criticised, critiqued and "owned" by people you have no contact with? It's a wierd feeling. There's no right or wrong with it, it's just a consequence of putting yourself in the public eye. A consequence of "selling yourself" or "giving of yourself".

Nicole is hardly a young girl thrust into the spotlight unwillingly. This is her life. She has all the perks and seemingly accepts the drawbacks. There is a scaled loss in civil liberties the higher the profile.

I don't see how you can argue that point, when an incredibly famous person cannot have a meal in a resteraunt in certain cities without being stared at, asked for autographs or photographed without permission.

Whether Nicole smokes or not is her choice. If she smokes in public she is influencing the choices of others. If she can live with contributing to female cancer and health problems then fine. It is a consequence.

The same is true of parenting. A man without a child can do whatever he wants. If he has a son, his behaviour no longer affects just him, but also the child who is taking in his bahaviour, modelling himself on him, becoming like him.

Role modelling exists. Mentoring exists. Influence exists. Learned behaviour exists. To deny such things is to deny the very nature of an ever learning, imitative species.

[Yorick]

Originally posted by Timber Loftis: Personally, I would feel the responsibility if I were famous. But, that speculation is easier to do on this side of the silver screen.

Precisely my point Timber. So I spent my 15 minutes analysing the phenomena.