02-19-2002, 07:59 PM | #1 |
Drizzt Do'Urden
Join Date: June 11, 2001
Location: Wherever the road takes me.....
Age: 53
Posts: 609
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I hope this helps evryone appeoaching middle age....
1. If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. 3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. 4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. 5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before. 6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. 7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious. 8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission. 9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. 10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip. 11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. 12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good. 13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway. 14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it. 15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes. 16. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. 17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places. 18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming. 19. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it. 20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on. 21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. 22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends. 23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator. 24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world. 25. It ain't the jeans that make your butt look fat.
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I am the Angel of Death You Can Not Hide |
02-19-2002, 08:39 PM | #2 |
20th Level Warrior
Join Date: November 3, 2001
Location: Texas
Age: 54
Posts: 2,830
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LOL. How about, "Never attribute something to malice that can satisfactorily be explained by stupidity." or "A horrible ending is better than horrors without end."
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Lady Galadria,Goddess\' Equal of the O.R.T.; [img]\"http://havak.db-forge.com/portraits/bitmaps/wlf180L.bmp\" alt=\" - \" /><br />\"Romance at short notice was her specialty.\" - Saki <br />Founder of the IW Branch of the Anti-Anomen Society |
02-19-2002, 09:31 PM | #3 |
Manshoon
Join Date: January 28, 2002
Location: USA
Posts: 152
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These are just great! And most so true. I loved them.
[img]graemlins/laugh3.gif[/img]
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02-20-2002, 01:48 AM | #4 |
Galvatron
Join Date: March 29, 2001
Location: Everywhere I wanna go its already where I am,cause I am already there
Posts: 2,130
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LOL, I liked 1 and 13.
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<br /><br />So if in the shaddows look behind you, because thats where the ranger will be. |
02-20-2002, 02:14 AM | #5 |
Avatar
Join Date: June 16, 2001
Location: Far from where I was, nearer where I wish.
Age: 41
Posts: 563
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how about "Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean their not out to get you."
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02-20-2002, 04:40 AM | #6 |
Ninja Storm Shadow
Join Date: March 27, 2001
Location: Northport,Alabama, USA
Age: 62
Posts: 3,577
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LOL! I am where and doing that.
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Crustiest of the OLD COOTS "Donating mirrors for years to help the Liberal/Socialist find their collective rear-ends, because both hands doesn't seem to be working. Veitnam 61-65:KIA 1864 66:KIA 5008 67:KIA 9378 68:KIA 14594 69:KIA 9414 70:KIA 4221 71:KIA 1380 72:KIA 300 Afghanistan2001-2008 KIA 585 2009-2012 KIA 1465 and counting Davros 1 Much abliged Massachusetts |
02-20-2002, 06:12 AM | #7 |
Mephistopheles
Join Date: December 12, 2001
Location: Fryslân, The Netherlands
Age: 44
Posts: 1,493
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quote: Hah! That's gonna be my new motto in life. EDIT: Wait a sec, if I look at my life so far, it seems that this has been my motto all along. [ 02-20-2002: Message edited by: J'aran ] |
02-20-2002, 08:54 AM | #8 |
Mephistopheles
Join Date: October 2, 2001
Location: Greece
Age: 35
Posts: 1,463
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LOL. I really liked 9 [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
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<br />I\'ve searched the whole world and ended up back in Ironworks. Home sweet home! |
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