08-26-2004, 06:56 AM | #1 |
Unicorn
Join Date: October 4, 2001
Location: Kingdom of the West,..P.o. Cynagus
Posts: 4,212
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To Exercise or Not to Exercise
1. It is well documented that for every mile that you jog, you add one minute to your life. This enables you, at age 85, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5,000 per month. 2. My grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60. She is now 97 and we don't know where the hell she is. 3. The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again. 4. I joined a health club last year, spent about $400. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up. 5. I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I am doing. 6. I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up our body. 7. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. 8. I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them. 9. The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier. 10. If you are going to try cross country skiing, start with a small country. 11. And last, but not least, I don't jog - it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.
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08-26-2004, 07:21 AM | #2 |
Jack Burton
Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Aussie now in the US of A!
Age: 37
Posts: 5,403
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Hahahahaha ROFLMAO!!! each and every one of those were great [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]
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08-26-2004, 09:08 AM | #3 |
40th Level Warrior
Join Date: March 24, 2002
Posts: 10,215
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Somehow I don't like the sound of the no.9 .
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08-26-2004, 09:29 AM | #4 |
Harper
Join Date: October 6, 2001
Location: Iceland
Posts: 4,706
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I'm making #7 my sig... [img]smile.gif[/img]
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08-26-2004, 11:24 AM | #5 |
Iron Throne Cult
Join Date: March 12, 2001
Location: Manila, Philippines
Age: 39
Posts: 4,864
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Hahaha... I love exercise... [img]tongue.gif[/img]
It's great, it's fun it makes me feel good. At least I can touch my toes [img]tongue.gif[/img] hahaha |
08-26-2004, 11:29 AM | #6 | |
Jack Burton
Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Aussie now in the US of A!
Age: 37
Posts: 5,403
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Quote:
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08-26-2004, 12:30 PM | #7 |
The Dreadnoks
Join Date: September 27, 2001
Location: Orlando, FL
Age: 61
Posts: 3,608
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Arvon, Dude, you are on a ROLL!
The first one hits hard. 1. It is well documented that for every mile that you jog, you add one minute to your life. This enables you, at age 85, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5,000 per month. I've been in the over 50 a month club for 20+ years now. Hmm, and I still have to sit down to touch my toes!
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08-26-2004, 12:38 PM | #8 |
Zartan
Join Date: May 20, 2003
Location: Near Aberdeen, Scotland
Age: 35
Posts: 5,225
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Haha Felix
Well, those are very...cheesy.
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08-26-2004, 12:58 PM | #9 |
Horus - Egyptian Sky God
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Yes!! [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img] Anti-exercise!! Btw, I cant touch my toes without bending my knees, either. (Very tight hamstrings).
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