Aggravations from my PnP days

[Micah Foehammer]

ROTFL ...

well the vampire story is going to cost the company a new keyboard ... lol ... just snorted coffee all over it ... TOO funny!!!

And the Nikki story is priceless .....

Forgot another pet peeve .... "The Scientific Rules Lawyer" ... Nikki would qualify .... lol

[Morgan_Corbesant]

i had a character that was ungodly good. i thought the dice were weighted when i made my character. the dm allowed it though, so i kept it. it was going to be a thief, but when i got my stats, i made him a fighter.these were his stats:
Elf
Samurai

Str-18/78
Dex-18
Con-16
Int-14
Wis-15
Chr-16

anyway, we bought all of our gear, i hate splintmail, a two-handed katana, a helmet, a wakazashi, i was a badass, at level 1. well, as soon as we left the tavern to start our quest, i was struck by a bolt of lightning from the storm outside, and died. i had to make a new character. needless to say, it suct. i have looked in the heroes and villains lorebooks, and there are some EXTREMELY powerful people in those things, with HIGH stats. for instance, a human female named ALIAS has 17's in EVERY stat. she is proficient in ALL swords, maces, lances, dagger (thrown and wielded), axes, club, dart, all pole arms, morning star, quarterstaff. what the hell is up with that?! anyway, i thought it was messed up that i could die like that, since i had good potential to go far in the game. i kept the character sheet though, because you never know if someone will allow me to use it sometime.

[Victor von Steiner]

I don't have anything to share right now. But as for Alias she is a constructed being. If you read the Finderstone Trilogy you will find out alot more about her.

[Sir Kenyth]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Morgan_Corbesant:
i had a character that was ungodly good. i thought the dice were weighted when i made my character. the dm allowed it though, so i kept it. it was going to be a thief, but when i got my stats, i made him a fighter.these were his stats:
Elf
Samurai

Str-18/78
Dex-18
Con-16
Int-14
Wis-15
Chr-16

anyway, we bought all of our gear, i hate splintmail, a two-handed katana, a helmet, a wakazashi, i was a badass, at level 1. well, as soon as we left the tavern to start our quest, i was struck by a bolt of lightning from the storm outside, and died. i had to make a new character. needless to say, it suct. i have looked in the heroes and villains lorebooks, and there are some EXTREMELY powerful people in those things, with HIGH stats. for instance, a human female named ALIAS has 17's in EVERY stat. she is proficient in ALL swords, maces, lances, dagger (thrown and wielded), axes, club, dart, all pole arms, morning star, quarterstaff. what the hell is up with that?! anyway, i thought it was messed up that i could die like that, since i had good potential to go far in the game. i kept the character sheet though, because you never know if someone will allow me to use it sometime.

---

Just spontaniously and struck by lightning from a storm with no chance of resurrection? It sounds like a setup to me! Hmmmmmmm!

[Galadria]

My fave was when we were gaming at a local auditorium, and the rules were that if anybody that knew how to play showed up, then we would have to let him/her. A type showed up who might be familiar to some of you. He was a Nazi fanatic, and claimed to have a 10th leevel wizard. We were a bit skeptical (None of us was higher than 9th) and we hadn't seen this guy around-it was a small world, gaming, back then-but we let him play. He whips out this spanking new wizard figure with a black robe with swastikas all over it. All during the game, he kept ranting about how great his mage was and a bunch of Nazistuff. Finally, the DM says"You see a beautiful elven lass run across your path, and called on this guy first. He says"I cast Paralyse on her. The DM rolls, he is successful. Then he says,"I knock her down pull off her clothes, and rape her." The rest of us protest, especially me; he says, "She is of an inferior race. Heil Hitler." The DM allows it. Ominously. The next door we go through, the DM rolls the dice and says,"Himmler the Black is siezed by a giant lizard, who scuttles down a hole with him, No saving throw." Well, this guy goes bananas. We are all laughing fit to die. The SS-sorcerer ends up in a nest with a bunch of eggs and a door to it that takes 16+ strength to open. Of course, he can't.The eggs start opening and little dragons start coming out. He begs us all, even my little Palidette 2nd level, but 18 strength, to crawl down the hole and open the door, but no dice. He is killed by the dragons, and the guy storm=troopers out, never to be seen again. I'm not sure if that's my worst or best experience.

[Micah Foehammer]

Galadria -

I love stories with a sense of poetic justice. [img]smile.gif[/img]

That was truly a bad situation that ended up all right in the end. One can ONLY hope that the nazi-mage's time with that group was VERY brief.

[Micah Foehammer]

Cerek -

here are some more one-liners

"What do you mean 'the pile of bones appears to move'?"

"(player rolls a one and fails his save) Okay, I guess i've fallen for her .. I'll kiss her ... what do you mean she's NOT a winged elf?"

"Can dragons swim?"

"I swear .... if you guys don't shape up I am going to bust this staff in two!"

"I told you not to drink BOTH of those potions!"

"Anybody got a remove curse scroll?"

"I hate it when that happens ...."

"That is REALLY going to leave a mark ..."

"CLICK????? (pregnant pause as the DM passes the player a note ..) Oh damn ...."

"Fighters to the front ... Fighters to the front ... If I hear that one more time, I'm going to shove that wand up your butt!!!!"

"Does anyone else smell sulphur burning?"

"I TOLD you we couldn't trust that guy!"

and my all time favorite (from my 12th lvl paladin to his half-orc barbarian comrade ...

"Yeah, I know it's been a while since we've eaten. No, I haven't seen anything even remotely resembling food! Will you STOP IT!!!??? I don't care HOW hungry you are!! I don't care if you know a great recipe! I don't care if your stomach rumblings attract every monster within one hundred miles! Lay ONE hand on my horse and I swear you'll lose it at the shoulder! STOP DROOLING LIKE THAT!!!!"

[Lord of Alcohol]

Oh the tales I could tell, but heres one. I used to dm a lot a long time ago and one player wnated to play a Duergar. I said ok go ahead, warning him there would be implications when dealing with certain races. He said ok. Rolls him up using Unearthed Arcana dice rolls. He does VERY well. I mean VERY well. Every stat MAXED except for one (dex) and he thought his character sucked. Because he only had a 16 (?) dex. I told him and the whole rest of the group, ok how about this, make your own stats( I was pissed) dont even bother rolling the dice, just give yourself whatever the hell you want. That gaming session really pissed me off.

[Cerek the Barbaric]

My best character (stat wise) was actually a ranger. Being a huge Tolkien fan, I played rangers a lot.

I use to literally roll up dozens of sets of stats to get some good ones. We used 5D6, keep the best three and re-roll the lowest stat (if necessary). Well, I finally hit Near Perfection one night. I rolled 2 18's, 3 17's, and 1 16. Just to be greedy, I re-rolled the 16 and got ANOTHER 17!!!.

My ranger had the following stats:
Str - 18** (don't remember the percentage, but it was above 80)
Dex - 17
Con - 18
Int - 17
Wis - 17
Cha - 17

Sounds pretty good. But arrogance and stupidity lead to him being the ONLY character I ever had permanently killed. BTW, he and Cerek started their adventuring careers together and never traveled without the other, until my ranger's untimely demise.

Micah mentioned Killer DM's earlier. Here's another example of what Kaylor would do (OK, I HATE that name. From now on, he will just be KDM).
In one of his games, KDM was hitting us with a bunch of critters (goblins, gnolls, something like that). One of the PC's had a Figurine that he wanted to activate.
KDM said "OK, but it takes 3 full rounds to activate"
PC "WHAT?! What do you mean it takes 3 rounds"
KDM "It takes 1 initiative to remove the figurine from your pocket, 1 initiative to set it on the ground, and 1 more initiative to say the command word"

In case you haven't guessed, KDM's career was short-lived with us. At first, it was fun to see if we could actually accomplish anything before he killed us, but we finally just got fed up with it and quit running in any of his games.

[Cerek the Barbaric]

Galadria,

I have to say that I admire your tolerance level. Our group would have sent that joker packing after the first 5 minutes.

Then again...maybe not.

There was on guy who started gaming with us that was THE most offensive and abrasive person I had ever met. He had an innate ability to cast Repulsion on Sight (ie, he was the kinda guy you just hated as soon as you saw him. I'm not exaggerating...he was that bad).

I have to admit that his first night in our group WAS kinda funny in a way. Once again, we were playing the "closed campaign" I've mentioned (for future reference, the campaign was in Hyboria (Conan's homeland) and the DM was called JL). Anyway, instead of the normal 4-5 players, we had 13...plus this new guy.
He said that he really wanted to join our campaign, so JL allowed him in. The ENTIRE night, all he did was browse through the various porno mags of the guy whose room we were using. Anytime the party had an encounter, we had to pry him loose from the mags and say "What is your character doing?" Needless to say, he didn't contribute anything worthwhile.
What was funny about the situation was when we were all eating at the cafeteria the next day. Everybody kept asking everybody else "WHO invited that creep last night?" Turns out, NOBODY knew how he even got to the room. NOBODY had invited him and everybody just assumed he must be friends with one of the others. That was several years ago, and to this day, we have NEVER figured out how he knew we were going to be gaming that night.