Corporations Suck :P

I work for a HUGE international company now - doesn't that sound good? Pfeh!

not only am I a number (and not a name anymore) but:

we are no longer allowed to use Internet during our lunch breaks. It's deemed "unprofessional". Well, my answer to taht is "fine! then I'm not contactable for WORK issues on my lunch breaks"

We shall also have UNIFORM PC backgrounds as we are now officially all drones

and the backstabbing is as bad as it was working for my previous employer

WWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Not all corporations are like that [img]smile.gif[/img]
Some corporations even pay some of their people to be on the net [img]smile.gif[/img] It helps if you work in the IT department though. Sorry about your situation, but the good thing about corps, that treat their people badly is, some other corp. will hire their best talent away [img]smile.gif[/img] The system works Oh and did no one inform your superiors that there are actually useful business related sites on the internet? I think your company may be due for extinction if they haven't figured that out.

[ 06-10-2002, 12:57 PM: Message edited by: MagiK ]

[Rikard_OHF]

In that case you'll HAVE to be on internet for personal stuff during work houres [img]tongue.gif[/img]

actually i DO work in the IT department and we have to use the net for work. But they are monitoring what sites we do now

OMG!!!! Those message boards - they're so HORRIFIC

[img]tongue.gif[/img]

[Elif Godson]

I am waiting on my corp to do the same, but until that day come's I will net away Sometimes it's nice just to be a number in a sea of them, it's when people learn your name when thing's get dangerous

Originally posted by Elif Godson: I am waiting on my corp to do the same, but until that day come's I will net away Sometimes it's nice just to be a number in a sea of them, it's when people learn your name when thing's get dangerous

heh! it's when they want to stitch/blame you that they DO remember your name

[Charean]

For another evil look at corporations:

www.snarkinc.com

that is a truly evil company!!

Sorry to hear what you are going through, LS...changes never feel good when they take away choices.

[Sir Goulum]

Thats gotta be horrible. Well, I've got many years before I have to work

[Ar-Cunin]

Originally posted by Charean: For another evil look at corporations: www.snarkinc.com that is a truly evil company!!

Very funny - they offered me a position as VP (VicePresident) [img]graemlins/evillaughter2.gif[/img]

[The Hunter of Jahanna]

I got this little idea list from www.packingheat.com , one of the funniest places on the web.I hope it brightens yr work day.

Working World: The workplace is one of the most difficult environments to maintain your Anti-Social status. There is a constant pressure to contribute in meetings, to respond to your boss when he/she says good morning and to basically react to the inane comments of your co-workers. The workplace is also the place where a great majority of us spend most of our lives (a thought which should have a true Anti-Social quivering with rage). So it is especially important that the ambitious Anti-Social-in-training get a handle on how to truly be Anti-Social at work (without getting fired...that’s a key issue). Step One: The most important step in becoming truly anti-social at work is by customizing your workspace in a bizarre manner. This serves to deter the skin-suits that wander slack-jawed by your cubicle or office from striking up a meaningless banter with you. Key points to consider when choosing the décor of your office: does it hurt to look at, does it make me seem insane, am I horrifying without breaking the law. Examples are as follows: Build a collection of Chia Heads and plant one seed only on each so they all look like Alfalfa from the Little Rascals. Glare angrily at anyone who suggests that you many be planting them wrong. If you are at an ergonomically designed desk that takes up a full section of your cubicle, hang a sheet along the front edge and spend your lunches underneath your desk with a portable light. Let no one else in your "fort". Cover your bulletin board with copies of the same picture of your wife/child/pet/girlfriend/boyfriend. Quantity of pictures (excessive) and symmetry of layout on your bulletin board (obsessive) are key. Build stacks of phone books on your bookshelves, your desk and the floor. Make sure that every phone book is for a distant state and town. Explain to those who ask that you never want to be at a loss for a phone number. Cover your desk, tables, bookshelves and any free space with Jack Chick religious tracts. Do not offer them to others to read, but leave a stack of the "You’re Going to Burn in Hell" tracts within easy eyeshot of any passersby. Deck out every available surface of your office/cubicle with the team-oriented, motivational posters, coffee mugs, carved rocks and calendars available at stores like Successories. Insist on reading them to everyone who comes in your office. Step Two: Dress appropriately for the office place, but make sure everything you wear is black. Particularly effective if you are forced to wear a suit to work. Black jacket, black slacks, black shirt, black tie, black underwear, black shoes and black socks. You will inevitably be asked if you are going to a funeral. Respond that you expect to very soon while glaring at the questioner. Do not stop staring until they leave. Occasionally wear one white shoe. When it is pointed out to you, yell "Dammit, they got it again!". Proceed to tear the shoe from your foot. Offer it to the person who pointed out the color disparity. If they don't take it, throw it into your office space and walk around with one unshod foot for the rest of the day. Step Three: The proper attitude is a must. You need to find ways to address the oxygen-wasters who surround you in a friendly tone but with words that hurt...vaguely. This will make them feel like pond scum yet will not provide them with ammunition they could use to get you fired. The best way to do this is to develop pat answers to common questions. By using these over and over, they will soon cease to ask you anymore questions. Here are some examples: Them: Good morning. You: Good morning, ever think we might die in a car crash tonight? Them: What’s up? You: A relative directional concept with no bearing on anything work-related (walk away). Them: Did you have a good weekend? You: Yeah until that body cavity search. But it happens every weekend...I gotta stop running from the cops. Them: What did you do this weekend? You: Continued my training and scouted clock towers. You? Them: Would you like to get some lunch? You: No thanks, I brought some Blood & Tongue loaf for sandwiches. Want one? Them: Have a good night. You: Yeah, don’t die in a car crash, OK? Step Four: Take advantage of your position for full, negative impact. If you are a lowly mail room clerk, then make sure you bend all materials marked "Do Not Bend" and hold onto anything that looks like a bill for an extra week before delivering. If you're in middle management, make sure that your team is forever fearful of employee evaluations. Give them demerits for as many minor infractions as possible: showing up five minutes late to work, using the fax machine for personal faxes, using company time to surf personal web pages like this one. If you are advanced management, make sure that your bonus is never, ever distributed amongst the carrion below you. And don't forget to randomly fire as many people as you feel is necessary to keep yourself feared amongst the peasants. Congratulations, you’ve completed the Workplace section of the Anti-Social primer. The steps that you have taken in this tutorial will develop your subtlety skills for later, more dangerous anti-social behavior