Horoscopes!

[Rokenn]

Something to lighten things up a bit:
Aries: (March 21—April 19)
Love is strange. Repeating this fact no matter how you achieve orgasm will vastly aid your mental well-being this week.

Taurus: (April. 20—May 20)
Your life will be improved enormously by the sudden appearance of a wisecracking toady who leers over your shoulder and repeats the last word of every sentence you utter.

Gemini: (May 21—June 21)
You've always thought of Death as a journey into the infinite, but it turns out to be a lot more like Harry Dean Stanton.

Cancer: (June 22—July 22)
You just don't have what it takes to be a contemporary man; in spite of your intelligence, compassion, and instinct for fun, there's still the gigantic tits.

Leo: (July 23—Aug. 22)
And to think you laughed when your high-school yearbook named you Most Likely To Be Responsible For The Extinction Of The Frigate Bird.

Virgo: (Aug. 23—Sept. 22)
In spite of your photos, the Church will profess ignorance of the origin of the phrase "Lord love a duck."

Libra: (Sept. 23—Oct. 23)
Yet another great moment in American oration will be ruined by your constant, vicious heckling of Mr. Sandler.

Scorpio: (Oct. 24—Nov. 21)
Your desiccated remains will be found on a desert island along with an empty water bottle, three emergency ration packages, and the exact right CD for the occasion.

Sagittarius: (Nov. 22—Dec. 21)
You're excited to get what you've always deserved until you realize it amounts to $4.27 in pizza coupons.

Capricorn: (Dec. 22—Jan. 19)
You've never considered yourself a genius, which helps you avoid damaging blows to your self-image this Sunday.

Aquarius: (Jan. 20—Feb. 18)
You have always rejected the doctrine of reincarnation as superstitious nonsense, which comes as a great relief to Hindu couples expecting children early next month.

Pisces: (Feb. 19—March 20)
There's no life for you without love, except in the strictest biological and durational sense.

[ 10-24-2002, 04:40 PM: Message edited by: Rokenn ]

[Calaethis Dragonsbane]

lol, since my B'days in march, the 11th actually, I guess this would apply to me [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Pisces: (Feb. 19—March 20) There's no life for you without love, except in the strictest biological and durational sense.

thats utter rot [img]tongue.gif[/img] *grin* altho, no one tell Kat, she might be crushed *grin* I hope Att doesnt see this either [img]tongue.gif[/img] hehe. *grin* funny tho

[Ronn_Bman]

Originally posted by Rokenn: Libra: (Sept. 23—Oct. 23) Yet another great moment in American oration will be ruined by your constant, vicious heckling of Mr. Sandler.

Is that me?

[NiceWorg]

Mr Sandler.. a-ha, yeah sure, that´s the first one that actually makes sense..

World would be a better place without horoscopes. Yes yes! I insist to know whom invented them first.. babylonians?

[ 10-24-2002, 07:51 PM: Message edited by: NiceWorg ]