02-22-2004, 07:42 PM | #1 |
Elite Waterdeep Guard
Join Date: February 8, 2004
Location: Home
Age: 34
Posts: 9
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Bifore you read this I whant to apolijies to any discomfert to any blond hared girls out ther and I warn every one that they should not be drinking any drinks wile reading under the danger of dameging the computor or making a mess.
A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife, Susie, something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decided to buy her a cell phone. He showed her the phone and explained to her all of its features. Susie was excited to receive the gift and simply adored her new phone. The next day Susie went shopping. Her phone rang and, to her astonishment, it was her husband on the other end. "Hi, Susie," he said, "how do you like your new phone?" Susie replied, "I just love it! It's so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there's one thing I don't understand though..."! "What's that, sweetie?" asked her husband. "How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"
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Ray-ryu |
02-22-2004, 07:45 PM | #2 |
Jack Burton
Join Date: March 21, 2001
Location: Philippines, but now Harbor City Sydney
Age: 41
Posts: 5,556
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sigh.. it did made me smile though
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Catch me if you can.. |
02-22-2004, 07:55 PM | #3 |
Ra
Join Date: May 19, 2002
Location: The US of A
Age: 36
Posts: 2,365
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Yeah it made me smile aswell.
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Slythe is back! Back again! Haha! <br /><br />[url]\"http://imageshack.us\" target=\"_blank\"> [img]\"http://img472.imageshack.us/img472/9928/130blood4ts.jpg\" alt=\" - \" /></a> |
02-22-2004, 08:04 PM | #4 |
Avatar
Join Date: December 26, 2002
Location: Connecticut
Age: 35
Posts: 528
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[img]smile.gif[/img] sounds like my sister
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\"\'Fleshy, honey\' the paladin said, \'Yes, baby\' said the golem\"<br /><br />I have seen the others and I have discovered that this fight is not worth fighting<br /><br /> <img border=\"0\" alt=\"[pimpser]\" title=\"\" src=\"graemlins/pimpser.gif\" /> |
02-22-2004, 08:36 PM | #5 |
Harper
Join Date: October 6, 2001
Location: Iceland
Posts: 4,706
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heh... [img]smile.gif[/img]
My sister once called me at my homenumber, and the first thing she asked was "Were are you!?" And she is not blonde... [img]smile.gif[/img] |
02-22-2004, 09:24 PM | #6 |
Lord Ao
Join Date: May 17, 2001
Location: San Antonio, Texas, USA
Age: 54
Posts: 2,069
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Ok...no insults intended, just telling a blonde joke I know:
Three blondes walk into a bar, ask the bartender for a bottle of wine and 10 glasses. They then sit at a larger table, and the bartender overhears the talking about "59 days". After a few minutes, another group of three blondes comes in, and joins the other group. A few minutes later, another group of three enters. In each case, they keep carrying on louder and louder about "59 days". Finally, one blonde comes in by herself, carrying a picture frame. She joins the group, and they really begin to carry on now. The bartender, of course, is curious what the fuss is about. After a while, the blonde who came in by herself walks up to the bar, and asks for another bottle of wine. "I just have to ask you", the bartender inquired, "what are you carrying on about?" The blonde immediately smiles, and states "let me show you!" She runs back to the table, picking up the picture frame. She brings it back to the bar, and it is a completed jigsaw puzzle. It is one of the childrens' puzzles with the large pieces, and it is of the Cookie Monster from Sesame Street. "So what's the big deal", asks the bartender. The blonde replies, "See the corner? It says 2 - 4 years. It only took us 59 days to complete."
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[img]\"ubb/noncgi/smiles/new/ghoul.gif\" alt=\" - \" /><br /><br />\"The middle class pays all of the taxes, does all of the work.<br />The lower class exists just to scare the middle class.\"<br />-George Carlin |
02-22-2004, 09:50 PM | #7 |
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
Join Date: June 3, 2003
Location: New York
Age: 39
Posts: 3,302
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okay, I nkow a lot of blond jokes
A blond woman is tired of everybody making fun of her at work for being dumb, so she goes home and studies all the capitals of every state in the U.S. At work the next day, when people start making fun of her, she replies, "Oh yeah? Would I dumb person know the capital of every state in America?" So a guy nearby says, "Then what's the capital of Texas?" The blond thinks to herself that this one is easy. So she smiles and says, "T." [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]
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"You're a thief and a liar." "No, I only lied about being a thief." |
02-22-2004, 09:53 PM | #8 |
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
Join Date: June 3, 2003
Location: New York
Age: 39
Posts: 3,302
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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are on top of a burning building. The firefighters hold out their rescue blanket and tell the brunette to jump. So she jumps, and right when she's about to land safely on the blanket, they pull the blanket away and she hits the ground and dies. They tell the redhead to jump now. The redhead sayd, "How do I know you're not going to pull away the blanket?"
They reply, "We like redheads, just not brunettes. Don't worry. So she jumps, they pull away the blanket, and she's flat as a pancake. Then they tell the blond to jump. She says, nothing you say will make me trust you, so just put the blanket down and back away. [img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img]
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"You're a thief and a liar." "No, I only lied about being a thief." |
02-22-2004, 09:54 PM | #9 |
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
Join Date: June 3, 2003
Location: New York
Age: 39
Posts: 3,302
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A man comes home and sees his blond wife standing over the sink and crying. He asks her what’s the matter, and she tells him in a sad voice that she dropped the ice on the floor, so she tried to wash it under warm water, only now she can’t find it.
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"You're a thief and a liar." "No, I only lied about being a thief." |
02-22-2004, 09:56 PM | #10 |
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
Join Date: June 3, 2003
Location: New York
Age: 39
Posts: 3,302
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A brunette goes to the doctor and says, “Doctor, every single bone in my body is broken, look!” She takes her index finger and touches her arm. “Ow!” Then she touches her leg. “Ow!” Then she touches her chest, and again yells, “Ow!”
Then the doctor looks are her and says, “You must be a natural blonde.” The woman says, “How’d you know?” The doctor replies, “Because your index finger is broken.”
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"You're a thief and a liar." "No, I only lied about being a thief." |
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