02-02-2004, 02:55 PM | #1 |
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
Join Date: November 15, 2001
Location: Asheville, NC
Posts: 3,253
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What follows is a story that was sent to my by a friend .... [img]smile.gif[/img] ================================================== ============
Next time you have a bad day at work...think of this guy. Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to The X, 103.2 on your FM dial in Ft Wayne IN, who was sponsoring a "worst job experience" contest. Needless to say, she won. Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: we have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do when I get to the bottom and start working is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling 35 minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for 2 days because my butthole was swollen shut. So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt! Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job..."
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“Every tavern’s an opportunity, I say.” |
02-02-2004, 03:27 PM | #2 |
Zartan
Join Date: July 18, 2001
Location: America, On The Beautiful Earth
Age: 50
Posts: 5,373
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LOL Instant Classic!!! [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]
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Support Local Music and Record Stores! Got Liberty? |
02-02-2004, 03:34 PM | #3 |
Vampire
Join Date: January 29, 2003
Location: Sweden
Age: 43
Posts: 3,888
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ROFL! Ouch!
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Nothing is impossible, it's just a matter of probability. |
02-02-2004, 03:35 PM | #4 |
Symbol of Cyric
Join Date: November 12, 2002
Location: Banstead, Southeast England
Age: 37
Posts: 1,162
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ROFLMAO!!! That's bad! Poor guy, all his collegues laughing too...
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02-02-2004, 03:53 PM | #5 |
Baaz Draconian
Join Date: November 5, 2002
Location: Denmark
Age: 57
Posts: 724
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I am glad I am sitting on a chair when I am working
[img]graemlins/greenbounce.gif[/img] Insane
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Ko-founder of the SCFC(TM) Korporation. |
02-02-2004, 05:34 PM | #6 |
Baaz Draconian
Join Date: September 8, 2002
Location: Cornelius,NC
Age: 36
Posts: 700
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ouch! *never complains about school again*
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I am the Ferret king, master of the hordes, allied to Someguy\'s mighty pinguins, we will soon rule the world! |
02-02-2004, 07:00 PM | #7 |
Apophis
Join Date: July 29, 2003
Location: The Underdark cavern of Zagreb
Age: 37
Posts: 4,679
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I love school. School is good. There are no jellyfish in th school. It is safe. [img]smile.gif[/img]
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MAKE LOVE, NOT SPAM! |
02-02-2004, 11:37 PM | #8 |
Lord Ao
Join Date: May 17, 2001
Location: San Antonio, Texas, USA
Age: 53
Posts: 2,069
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Lol...That's a good one!
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[img]\"ubb/noncgi/smiles/new/ghoul.gif\" alt=\" - \" /><br /><br />\"The middle class pays all of the taxes, does all of the work.<br />The lower class exists just to scare the middle class.\"<br />-George Carlin |
02-03-2004, 12:11 AM | #9 |
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
Join Date: September 15, 2002
Location: Kennewick, WA
Age: 52
Posts: 3,166
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Ya sure, but do you know how much those guys get paid?
Anyway, that would suck... [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]
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02-03-2004, 03:08 AM | #10 |
Harper
Join Date: October 6, 2001
Location: Iceland
Posts: 4,706
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Kathen... nothing... is worth it for having a Jellyfish up your butt
At least they could not pay me enough for that... ever [img]smile.gif[/img] |
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