my crummy car

[Megabot]

my crummy car

I drive a crummy car.
my right headlight's
hanging on by a wire,
and there's a huge dent in my door.

the other day I was driving on the freeway,
and, you know how you slow down
to check out a really bad accident?
I did that, and the people in the accident
were looking at my car.

bald tires and no spare,
motor chugs like it's gasping for air,
speedometer's broken, won't go in reverse,
hang on a minute, it's gonna get worse,
tags are expired, windshield's cracked,
broken tail lights, broken eight track,
the brakes are bad, clutch is worn,
and I'm getting laryngitis 'cause
I haven't got a horn.
I drive a crummy car.

every time I park, people come up to me
and say, "hey, are you okay?"

I get out and they go, "look, he's walking away!"

when I pick up a date, and we walk out
to my car, I say, "my God, I've been hit!"

I was so embarrassed
by the way my car looked
I bought a car cover
to put over it.
I cut a hole where the windshield is
so I could drive with it on.

bald tires and no spare,
motor chugs like it's gasping for air,
trunk won't shut, engine overheats,
heater doesn't work, radiator leaks,
mirror's busted, clock hangs from the dash,
holes in the floorboard- there goes my trash.
the brakes are bad, clutch is worn,
and I'm getting laryngitis 'cause
I haven't got a horn.
I drive a crummy car.

my car has an alarm that says, "step back,
you're too close, and stop laughing."

I'm always being towed.
my car's been towed backwards
so much on a tow truck
the mileage has gone
back to zero.

someone broke into my car
and stole my club.

I drive a dented up, crummy car,
but it's not all bad.
I drove through the car wash,
and when I came out,
the owner apologized
and wrote me a check.

And this car IS LIKE mine haha the car i use every day lol i HATE it LOL LOL!!

[ 07-06-2002, 12:03 PM: Message edited by: Megabot ]

[Madman-Rogovich]

gotta love those bangers

Actually, that sounds a lot like my car!

[Megabot]

Or this one!!

my brother, Nathan
I miss being a kid,
doing things just
for the fun of
it.
I miss going
into the kitchen
and spraying Pledge
on the linoleum floor,
then calling my dog,
and watching him go
sliding
into the
wall.

how come we don't do
things like that
when we get older?

my brother, Nathan, does.

he's twenty-five now.

when he was seven
he was
in a car accident
and lost his arm.
he has an artificial arm.

but he doesn't
let it get him
down.

he'll go up to people
and ask them if they
want to Indian wrestle,
then he'll let his arm
go flying off and say,
"hey man, take it easy!"

one time he went
into a tattoo parlor,
put his arm on the
counter, and said,
"I'll be back in an hour."

he'll take his girlfriend to
the movies.
when he goes
to get popcorn,
he'll leave
his arm around her.

if it's a horror movie,
he'll take his arm off
and toss it back
about 3 rows.

when he goes to a
football game,
he gets his hand stamped,
then he throws his arm
over the fence
so his friends can
get in for free.

I'm going to be…more like
Nathan.
I'm putting Pledge
on the kitchen floor
right now.
"Grandma, come here!"

LOL!

[/)eathKiller]

hmm modern poetry...
quite exquisitley elegant in its straight-to-it-edness...



I'll try one:

eye half a nü spell chekur
eye yuse it ivory dai
it heaps me speel lawts of thyngs
in the peroper weigh

eye luv mai nü spell checkur
eye real e real e du
with awt mai nü spell chekur
eye would tipe lyke eye wuz too

[Animal]

Adam Sandler did a song a while back, called "My piece of s**t car." Very funny.

[/)eathKiller]

In Cuba the newest model car is a 57 Chevy

[Loumistro]

I feel sorry for your car. And you for having to drive it. I am 15 and I already have nice car sitting in my driveway waiting for me to get my licsenses man do I love having A car waiting on me.