Kids, don't cross the line...

[Aerich]

Maybe now that he's suffered the consequences of his actions he will think about what he's doing before he does it. At thirteen years old, he needs to know that his parents are still the bosses. If he's unhappy and it causes friction in the parent-child relationship, so be it. He obviously didn't respect his parents' property before, but maybe he will now that they've got his attention.

[Arledrian]

But that's just bad parenting, plain and simple. It increases the gap between adult and child and fuels more of an unhealthy relationship by alienating the two in that way. The kid doesn't suddenly respect his parents, he now fears them. That's wrong, I'm sorry. I would not be able to hold my head high as a parent if I had to lower myself to taking away what little pleasures my child had. The kid is obviously lacking something here and you don't solve that by fighting fire with fire - it just makes the parent look worse by not being able to rise above the incident and get to the root of it.

[Zero Alpha]

Originally posted by Arledrian: But that's just bad parenting, plain and simple. It increases the gap between adult and child and fuels more of an unhealthy relationship by alienating the two in that way. The kid doesn't suddenly respect his parents, he now fears them. That's wrong, I'm sorry. I would not be able to hold my head high as a parent if I had to lower myself to taking away what little pleasures my child had. The kid is obviously lacking something here and you don't solve that by fighting fire with fire - it just makes the parent look worse by not being able to rise above the incident and get to the root of it.

I thogroly agree. what is worse is the pairents left the bottle of champagne in the fridge, where it was easily accessable to their 13 year old son. am i the only one who thinks its hypocritical to keep alcohol lying around the house, but at the same time punish the son for drinking it.

[shadowhound]

Originally posted by Zero Alpha: quote: Originally posted by Arledrian: But that's just bad parenting, plain and simple. It increases the gap between adult and child and fuels more of an unhealthy relationship by alienating the two in that way. The kid doesn't suddenly respect his parents, he now fears them. That's wrong, I'm sorry. I would not be able to hold my head high as a parent if I had to lower myself to taking away what little pleasures my child had. The kid is obviously lacking something here and you don't solve that by fighting fire with fire - it just makes the parent look worse by not being able to rise above the incident and get to the root of it.

I thogroly agree. what is worse is the pairents left the bottle of champagne in the fridge, where it was easily accessable to their 13 year old son. am i the only one who thinks its hypocritical to keep alcohol lying around the house, but at the same time punish the son for drinking it. [/QUOTE]I disagree, I think that the child should know by the age of 13 what is right and what is wrong and therefor should be punished for anything they did. We have had a bottle of wine sitting in our fridge for the last 18 years, both myself and my brother know that its their but neither of us have touched it.
While I think that the parents should have tought the child better I also believe that he deserved what he got.

[Dron_Cah]

Hmmm, not enough trust? Well, they obviously trusted him enough for him to be home alone, invite his friends over, trash the house, steal their beer and wine, and then lie about it. Hmmm, that deserves their trust! [img]tongue.gif[/img] If there's no punishment, and no fear, why wouldn't he do it again? Besides, sitting around gaming all day, probably isn't the healthiest thing for their child, so i think they killed two birds with one stone: Showed that there are consequences to one's actions, and maybe increasing his activity level by not allowing him to get his pleasure from sitting around all day. Heh, but that's just my 2 cents, and I assure you, I'm also not a parent. (Also, I am sitting right next to a cabinet, full of whiskey, wine, champagne, burbon, gin, etc. as well as alcohol in the fridge, but I haven't touched them. I'm 18 as of three days ago, too!)

[Blackknite04]

Far as I'm concerned that kid got off lucky. In my day If I got caught doing that.My a** would of gotten redder than a tomatoe. At that age you should know right from wrong.IMO apparently this kid had no respect for his parents to do this in the first place,and probably has never been punished for anything that he has done before.For the people saying that it was wrong for the parents to do that, give me a break next you'll be saying that being grounded is to servere.

[Dirty Meg]

Originally posted by shadowhound: We have had a bottle of wine sitting in our fridge for the last 18 years

Don't mean to nitpick, but it would age better if you left it at room temp and then chilled it before you drink it. (I am assuming it is white wine. If not you shouldn't chill it at all).

[ 06-28-2004, 08:35 AM: Message edited by: Dirty Meg ]

[Stormymystic]

my parents did that to me, only it was my bike that they sold to a pawn shop, with me in the car

[Sir Kenyth]

Originally posted by Ilander: Parents still lost nearly sixty bucks...I'd say, what they hey, twelve hours at minimum wage of scrubbing the house with a tooth-brush would be pretty good for him... Oh, and I'm eighteen, and haven't pulled that crap, Sir Kenyth...but my older sister did... Definitly a good, modern solution. Can you all imagine if that had happened fifty years ago?

Bud, I'm not saying it's right at ANY age to raid the booze. I'm just saying that you expect certain infractions to occur at certain ages and booze raiding house parties aren't expected by me until about mid-teens. This particular child doesn't have enough self control to be left alone. MAke sure he is watched at all times and he'll get the hint. My son skipped school twice when I allowed him to stay home in the morning for the hour it took after I left for work for the bus to get there. He was 11. I had to put him back in morning day care with the 6-8 year olds. That's the way it works. If the kid can't handle the freedom responsibly, take it away. The PS/2 is a good punishment, but improved supervision by the parents is a must.

[Sir Kenyth]

Originally posted by Arledrian: I agree with Zero Alpha. I think they're lousy parents. It's not going to stop the kid doing it again, it's just going to increase rebellions, misunderstandings, and emnity between child and adult. Kids'll be kids, you know. They need to have fun, make memories, go through things they can tell their kids in years to come. I've never been one for curfews and ridiculous punishments, I think they're for inept parents who don't trust their children enough - and a lack of trust, respect and freedom is what makes kids do bad things in the first place.

Sure kids WILL be kids, and kids will be punished for doing the inevitably stupid things they'll do. It's the circle of life. Sure, we did it as kids, and we were punished for it, or at least should have been. If we quit punishing kids for the things we did as kids too, the world would go to hell in a handbasket quickly. I think my Basic Training Drill Sergeant said it best, "I tried that love and understanding bulls#!7 last cycle! It didn't work worth a d@%n! If you want to keep a private from acting stupid quickly, make it hurt to be stupid!".