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Old 10-02-2002, 10:31 AM   #1
Arvon
Unicorn
 

Join Date: October 4, 2001
Location: Kingdom of the West,..P.o. Cynagus
Posts: 4,212
Top 10 Signs You're at a Redneck Wedding

10. Rehearsal dinner held at Hooters

9. Instead of "friends of the bride or friends of the groom," ushers ask "Ford or Chevy?"

8. Bridesmaids -- pink tube tops; bridegrooms -- Travis Tritt T-shirts

7. Phrase "I do" replaced by "I heard that"

6. Tender rendition of "The Wedding Song" performed by Pinkard & Bowden

5. When minister asks "who giveth this woman to be married," some guy in the back stands up and hollers, "Earnhardt!"

4. Reception conversation includes the phrase, "So what have you been doing since 'Hee Haw,' Mr. Lindsay?"

3. Snack trays at reception: Vienna sausages and nacho cheese Doritos

2. Plans for the honeymoon evening include tickets to the "Monster Truck Show"

1. Sign in front of the church: No shirt... No shoes... No problem
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Old 10-02-2002, 10:33 AM   #2
Calaethis Dragonsbane
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Join Date: May 29, 2002
Location: Somewhere in between
Age: 39
Posts: 7,029
For Kat, Att and Lady G: NO I REFUSE TO PARTISIPATE IN A WEDDING IF ITS ONE LIKE THIS [img]tongue.gif[/img] [img]tongue.gif[/img] [img]tongue.gif[/img] funny tho
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Old 10-02-2002, 01:08 PM   #3
Timber Loftis
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Join Date: July 11, 2002
Location: Chicago, IL
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I just wanted to let y'all know that I thought this was funny but my uncle dad was very offended.
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Old 10-02-2002, 01:21 PM   #4
RevRuby
Fzoul Chembryl
 

Join Date: July 11, 2002
Location: Limbo
Age: 44
Posts: 1,720
this is the wedding where they have beer debates right? and peeing contests? are the cows invited?
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Old 10-02-2002, 05:03 PM   #5
The Ornery One
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Join Date: May 17, 2002
Location: S. IL
Age: 48
Posts: 269
Quote:
Originally posted by RevRuby:
this is the wedding where they have beer debates right? and peeing contests? are the cows invited?
Actually they had cigarette debates, wrote their names in the snow, and the cows weren't invited but my sisters-in-law showed up anyway.
But I'm feeling mu-u-uch better now; sticking to smart city fellers.
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Old 10-02-2002, 05:09 PM   #6
Timber Loftis
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Join Date: July 11, 2002
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If your mother does not remove the Marlboro cigarette from between her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass. . .

you might be a redneck.
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Old 10-02-2002, 05:09 PM   #7
Ar-Cunin
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Join Date: August 14, 2001
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
Age: 52
Posts: 2,326
How come that I just knew that that you were behind this thread when I saw it on the front page, Arvon
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Old 10-02-2002, 08:25 PM   #8
AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe
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Join Date: October 11, 2001
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Age: 43
Posts: 2,217
Hey I was at a wedding just last month that had vienna sausages and doritos [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 10-07-2002, 05:05 PM   #9
Big Bad Bear
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Join Date: October 1, 2002
Location: Netherlands
Age: 45
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Quote:
Originally posted by Timber Loftis:
If your mother does not remove the Marlboro cigarette from between her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass. . .

you might be a redneck.
My mom is on Lucky Strikes... Should I be scared?
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Old 10-07-2002, 05:16 PM   #10
Timber Loftis
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Join Date: July 11, 2002
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Quote:
Originally posted by Big Bad Bear:
quote:
Originally posted by Timber Loftis:
If your mother does not remove the Marlboro cigarette from between her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass. . .

you might be a redneck.
My mom is on Lucky Strikes... Should I be scared? [/QUOTE]It depends. Does she light them with a match, a lighter, or by leaning over the bar and saying "which 'un of you fellers is gonna gimme a light"? As well, does she often tell people to kiss her ass? Until I have more info, I have to advise you not to get in the car with her after she's been drinkin' - unless of course you're going 4-wheelin in your car then it's okay (gotta be drinkin if you're 4-wheelin).
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