How about it??

[Memnoch]

Jerome, good on you for sharing. We all want the board to be a happy and comfortable place for everybody. I had a long discussion with Yorick about this - this is why boards like these are the 'cafes of the future', because people accept you for who you are.

Hey Jerome, I know how you felt there too. About the suicide thing. Remember, I did say I was really fat and awkward and just totally felt out of place. At least you had some friends that you could talk to. I was so shy and reserved that I really didn't have friends until after I lost the weight. I came really close to ending my life. I still have some of the scars to remind me how stupid I was. Luckily, I didn't cut anything vital. I thought long and hard about what I was trying to do and thought to myself that if I did it, I would have just proven that I didn't have what it takes. I realized just exactly what it was that I was giving up. I would never experience a lot of what I had read about. Never see places that I had never been before. Never really find out what love was. Well, I bandaged myself up and decided to take charge of my life. I lost the weight and then started talking to Debbie. I think you've already read the other post about our First Time, but that was right after all of this happened. I've had a lot of experiences since then. I've been in the Navy and travelled, got married right after that to a lesbian (both of us didn't know that at the time though), moved around a lot more because of that, then got divorced and hooked up with my ex and her lover (gf) again (long story there), now I'm in Florida. Actually, after all I've been through, this is the closest I've ever been to having MY OWN life. If I had ended it back then, I never would have survived a flood and a hurricane, nor would I have helped my niece to start talking and trying to read. I never would have helped my neighbor when she ran away (she was 15 at the time), and offer her a place to stay rather than force her to live on the streets (I helped her out until she was able to patch things up with her mom and be able to go home - about 3 months). There are just so many people that I have touched in my life that if I had ended things right there and then, it would have echoed out far and wide. Don't ever think that you aren't important. Because you are more important over a lifetime than you could ever think of in a minute. I'm not as shy as I used to be, but I still am a little shy. I guess that's why I identify with my Ranger so much. They are kinda like that too. My best advice is just try and learn from what you go through. You'll be surprised at what you can survive. Once you do, there's so much that you can do or say to help someone else that may have to go through it. Yes, we count you as a friend. And I hope to say that it will be a friendship that will last a lifetime.