11-05-2001, 07:29 AM | #1 |
Unicorn
Join Date: October 4, 2001
Location: Kingdom of the West,..P.o. Cynagus
Posts: 4,212
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The Evolution Of Mom
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here are some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your first: Your Clothes 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy. 2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes. The Baby's Name 1st baby: You pour over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites. 2nd baby: Someone has to name his or her kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you. 3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger points. Preparing for the Birth 1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously. 2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing. 3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month. The Layette 1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau. 2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains. 3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they? Worries 1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby. 2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn. 3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing. Pacifier 1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it. 2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle. 3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in. Diapering 1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not. 2nd baby: You change their diaper every 2 to 3 hours, if needed. 3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees. Activities 1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour. 2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics. 3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner. Going Out 1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times. 2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached. 3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood. At Home 1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby. 2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby. 3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
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11-05-2001, 07:43 AM | #2 |
Gold Dragon
Join Date: August 11, 2001
Location: The land of blonde virgins
Age: 42
Posts: 2,563
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Bumbaclot!
Thank god I'm not gonna be a mom...at least i don't hope so...
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11-05-2001, 10:03 AM | #3 |
Anubis
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Up in the Freedomland Alps
Age: 60
Posts: 2,474
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I wouldn't know, I only have one of those.
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[img]\"http://grumble.free.fr/img/romuald.gif\" alt=\" - \" /><br /><br />The missing link between ape and man is us. |
11-05-2001, 10:10 AM | #4 |
Iron Throne Cult
Join Date: March 12, 2001
Location: Manila, Philippines
Age: 39
Posts: 4,864
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Aww... poor third baby as his/her mom tries to hide away already!!! heehee
supermarket and dry cleaners... hey! I am first born and the last, but why have I the third child description? Injustice! [img]smile.gif[/img] |
11-05-2001, 10:58 AM | #5 |
Emerald Dragon
Join Date: October 1, 2001
Location: Somewhere
Age: 37
Posts: 934
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I'm the first born out of 4 total. Man I feel lucky now
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11-05-2001, 11:13 AM | #6 |
Anubis
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Up in the Freedomland Alps
Age: 60
Posts: 2,474
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quote: Because, honey sweetie, your Mum read the text above just before you were born !
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[img]\"http://grumble.free.fr/img/romuald.gif\" alt=\" - \" /><br /><br />The missing link between ape and man is us. |
11-05-2001, 12:24 PM | #7 |
Ironworks Moderator
Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Midlands, South Carolina
Age: 48
Posts: 14,759
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I can attest to the truth of these...at least #1 & #2 of each scenerio.
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