Canada's Been Invaded

[Morgeruat]

http://www.canada.com/national/natio...d-bc2e1a40243f


Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Canada's top remaining diplomat in Denmark was called before the Royal Danish Ministry of Foreign Affairs yesterday to discuss the disputed territory of Hans Island, a barren rock in the high Arctic.

Brian Herman, charge d'affaires of Canada's diplomatic mission in Copenhagen, was asked by officials about his country's intentions in the spat, recently inflamed by Danish sailors occupying the island during regular Arctic patrols.

Mr. Herman's response was that "it is not Canada's intention to stir up a tempest in a teapot," said Reynald Doiron, spokesman for Canada's Department of Foreign Affairs. "We want to keep an open mind on this and yes, we would be ready to resume discussions on the issue but there has been no definite agenda set," he said.

Peter Taksoe-Jensen, head of international public law with the Danish Ministry of Foreign Affairs, said the issue is not in danger of becoming an international incident. "The solution of the dispute over Hans Island is not going to be a military solution in the sense that Denmark is going to post military on the island or anything of that kind," Mr. Taksoe-Jensen said from Copenhagen.

"It is going to be a negotiated solution where Canada and Denmark sit together at the table at some stage when we come to this issue and find a solution."

Although he played down the presence of a Danish warship -- which has made repeated visits to the island with its sailors occupying the island and even unfurling the red and white flag of Denmark over it -- Mr. Taksoe-Jensen could not rule out further visits.

"Since we think of it as part of Danish territory, we feel officials have that right. It is only natural that Danish officials go there from time to time."

He said Copenhagen would take issue if Canada also landed soldiers on the island.

Canada has not had an ambassador in Denmark since Alfonso Gagliano was recalled by Paul Martin in the wake of the advertising scandal involving Mr. Gagliano's former government ministry.

The National Post has highlighted the dispute between Canada and Denmark over the tiny, desolate, ice-bound island as one of four international boundary disputes prompting concerns over the nation's ability to maintain sovereignty of its vast northern region.

The issue was also raised in Parliament, with Stockwell Day, the Conservative party's foreign affairs critic, calling on the government to fill Mr. Gagliano's post and for the restoration of military funding to help retain Arctic sovereignty.

"The nation of Denmark has laid claim to Canadian territory. Its military, from its warship, hoisted its flag on our Arctic territory without permission, without warning, and without any fear of being stopped," Mr. Day said on Friday.

"The government's utter disarray is underlined by the fact that the scandal has led to the recall of our ambassador to Denmark, the very nation that is challenging our sovereignty," Mr. Day said.

Aileen Carroll, Minister for International Co-operation, said Canada will continue to defend its interests.

"Hans Island constitutes part of the national territory of Canada. No assertion by the Danish ambassador or other Danish officials detracts from the absolute sovereignty that Canada enjoys over Hans Island," she said, repeating the official statement of Foreign Affairs.

Mr. Day said the issue highlights the military's weakness.

"This embarrassing situation shows that the Prime Minister was wrong when he was underfunding our national defence while he was finance minister ... and he is wrong today in leaving Canada exposed and embarrassed," he said in Parliament.

David Pratt, the Minister of National Defence, defended the government's record.

"A significant amount of money has been put into the navy over the last number of years. Since this government took over, significant investments have been made in the armed forces overall.... We are continuing to rebuild the Canadian Forces," he said.

[johnny]

Two groups of people making a fuss over a shitty piece of rock in the middle of nowhere.... now where have i heard this before ?

[wellard]

Don't cry for me Argentina Canada!

[pritchke]

Originally posted by johnny: Two groups of people making a fuss over a shitty piece of rock in the middle of nowhere.... now where have i heard this before ?

I actually agree it is a shitty piece of rock!! Sounds to bizarre to be true so I am not sure I believe this news story yet. But if it is I say if they want it so bad give it to them for a small sum of money and with the stipulation they must also establish an embassy on the island. I pity the poor smucks who get posted there. HAR!HAR!HAR!

[ 03-31-2004, 09:58 AM: Message edited by: pritchke ]

[Donut]

But this island is uninhabited - how can you compare that with the Falklands?

[Ilander]

Sorry if I offend, but I think it's kind of funny...reminds me of that Arrogant Worms song Canada is Really Big...take part of the land, and you take part of the Worms' pride in their homeland!

Originally posted by Ilander: Sorry if I offend, but I think it's kind of funny...reminds me of that Arrogant Worms song Canada is Really Big...take part of the land, and you take part of the Worms' pride in their homeland!

Calling us worms!? That's it! you wanna bash Canadians, I'll kick the crap out of Americans! Don't try and stop me, if this rage doesn't come out now, it's gonna come out later and it's gonna be nasty!

It takes Fifteen American Soldiers to take down ONE canadian soldier, what does THAT tell you? HUH!?!?

And what about our Health care system? Whether your rich or poor, you'll still live. Down in America, only Rich People live.

How about the Government? The American Government is OBSESSED with cencorship! The Canadian Government doesn't give a damn about it!

And when it comes to tolerence, we're standing on your head! Just watch! I garuntee every homosexual in the United states will come up north because you people think that gays are nothing but punching bags and moving targets!

I'm not done yet, Ilander!

How about relationships with Native People? You Americans *stole* their land! We just came along and comprimised with the Natives! You guys were shooting them, WE were getting drunk with them!

And what about International Relations? Is North Korea threatening Canada? Are muslims in the Middle-east shouting "Canada is Satan?" When's the last time you saw a terrorist attack on Canadian Soil? Why does Taiwan insist on making our souvaniers?

How about Gun Control? In Canada, a kid is lucky if he can even get his hands on a paintball gun! In America, the number two cause of death is guns! The number one cause of death? Not having a gun!

How about American Manners? Yeah, let's talk about that! Go down to Alabama or Georgia! People marry their cousins, sisters, daughters, brothers, fathers, mothers, aunts, and uncles! And what about the American way? If I'm not mistaken, that's where you tell someone how to live their lives! Here in Canada, we let people live *their own* lives and we marry *outside* the family!

And how about the darker sides of the governments? As we speak, your governments are building secret weapons, underground cities, and doing all kinds of shady crap! Up here, our Government isn't so mysterious.

There's also the matter of how "Jumpy" Americans are. Something goes wrong in society, they immediatley blame the Entertainment industry. Down here, we look to see what's wrong with the guy *before* we blame anything! When Americans see Unidentified Flying Objects, they're tripping over themselves: They're busting people who see it, filling out all kinds of paper work and desperatley trying to cover it up. In Canada, we don't care if a UFO flies over head! So what? They want to shove a giant metal machine up someone's ass! As long as they're not shoving anything up *your* ass, why a UFO is hovering over your neighbour's house is none of your buisiness!

And how about American Negotiation Skills? Had *we* been talking to Saddam, he would have disarmed his weapons. Hell, we probably could have convinced him to stop torturing people. But ooooohhhh noooo. You Americans tried to threaten him! LOOK WHAT HAPPENED!!! Iraq has turned into a large Detroit!

And what about American History vs. Canadian History. *cracks knuckles* Let's talk about that. If I'm not mistaken, Americans dragged people from Africa kicking and screaming into slavery. However, we were leading them to freedom with the Underground Railroad.

What about the Soviets in the Fifties? Who would they have to carve through to get to the Americans? That's right! Canada! So you Americans are being ungrateful! We were your helmet, and you thank us by doing everything from bashing us on your late nite TV shoes to killing two of our troops in Afghanistan?

Still not done yet! Ilander sent me on a rampage!

Let's talk about Privacy -- In America, it's considered nothing more than a Luxury now, not a right! Up here in Canada, we respect the privacy of our citizens, but our police respond to every crime with unbridled force!

Let's also talk about how your ancestors would view you: The Constitution has been eradicated, morons are now in high places, and ex-criminals who have changed their ways are still unforgiven. What would your founding fathers think?

Both Countries even have different views on racism: Apparently, Americans aren't as touchy about Racism as we are (if they were, why is the KKK still around and not all in coffins?) Where as up here, if you make a racial slur against ANYONE, ANYWHERE, expect a sound beating!

And what about environmental saftey? If you people would take care of your environment on a regular basis, there'd be no need for groups like the fanatical, but effective, Greenpeace. Up here, we've got National Parks and Animal Sanctuaries coming out the wazoo! We rely on the clean sources of Energy, like Hydro. You suicidal Americans rely on Nuclear Power! That's not clean: Something goes wrong, everything's gone and it delivers one hell of a punch to the environment!

That's much better....

[Luvian]

There's also the matter of how "Jumpy" Americans are.

Look like Canadians are jumpy too...

[Night Stalker]

And apparantly very polite and mannerly too ...

[pritchke]

I hope he wasn't being serious.

[ 03-31-2004, 12:50 PM: Message edited by: pritchke ]