Ethics and Parents...Please Respond

[Cloudbringer]

Garnet, you are what I like to think of as a 'responsible parent'! Yes, call me old fashioned, but I think a parent SHOULD be involved in their children's lives. [img]smile.gif[/img]

As to the matter at hand. Tricky one but I'd say you can teach your son by your example and by telling him straight out what you like or don't like about the friends he keeps and why. Let him know how you feel and hopefully he has learned by now that you care, have good sense and never do things just to 'lord it over' him, but rather because you do have more experience and it makes a difference.

He can find many ways to flaunt your rules and each time it will break more and more fibers in that bond of trust you share. If you put him in the position of constantly fighting against your decisions, you severely strain that bond. But and it's a big BUT!, you need to use your best judgement as to when/whether a situation merits digging in your heels and making your choice stick.

Children do listen to their parents before puberty and I believe they pick up the code of behavior their parents LIVE by. Agility no doubt knows you really do object to his being with this girl and is rebelling.. egad.. I do remember being a teen! [img]tongue.gif[/img]

AGILITY! I just want to say that sometimes a little defiance is good and helps define your personal space and development. But sometimes it can be silly, childish and danergous if not just plain foolish. I suspect that in this case it may be a bad idea to go against your parent's wishes, but you need to honestly talk with them and let them know what you are doing and why. I bet they are pretty reasonable if you let them be. [img]smile.gif[/img] As for sleeping around at your age.. or the girl's age.. you know, I could wail on you with horror stories, but I won't. I will just tell you that bad things do happen even to people who don't think they can ever be effected. Think twice and then think again. A little 'fun' now can mean a lot of pain later.


Cloudy

[ 03-02-2002: Message edited by: Cloudbringer ]

[Cloudbringer]

quote:

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Originally posted by Wedin:


"Of course, I know people who lost their virginity at the age of 14 (or earlier than that). It did cause them no harm. They are all a buch of assholes, but that they were before too."

IT DID CAUSE THEM NO HARM! Read it more closeley! I never said they SHOULD do it! It just isn't dangerous! Argh!

Then they have to learn to face the consequenses. They are racing towards a world of grown ups, and they must have become grown ups when they reach it. That is what the teens are all about, right?

I am 16 too, since you are so curious

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No offense but you seem kind of young to be an amateur psychologist there, Wedin. [img]smile.gif[/img] Do you know for a fact that your friends (who I suspect are around 16 now?) suffered NO consequences at all? Do you think they'd tell you if the did? If one got a disease and was ashamed would he/she tell YOU? If one had an abortion would she TELL you? If one has bad feelings about sex now, would they say so to their peers or just pretend to be cool?

Well, I could go on but I don't want to pick on you. [img]smile.gif[/img] I just want to make the point that one's friends may do a lot of not so smart things but they may not tell US they have regrets!

Cloudy