Did I do right or am I a Jackass?

Opinions wanted please. I would appreciate it if personal insults and criticisms were not applied to this topic/thread just honest opinions about what I did.

OK the stage is set, MagiK through a couple of friends ended up being set up with two blind dates this weekend. I had been given these ladies email address' a couple of weeks ago, and we have been exchanging email. Both wanted to meet this weekend, so I set up a date for Saturday and a date for Sunday.

I met C on Saturday and it was like lightning had hit...we met at a Dunkin Donuts for coffee and she was already there when I walked in. Her head down hair framing her face as she read the news paper. I was totaly blown away by her. I actually just stood off to one side and watched her for a minute before walking over and introducing myself. (She was the only lone female inthe place so I made the assumption it was her). What was supposed to be an hour or so talking in a coffee shop, ended up being a 14 hour marathon of sitting and talking back at her place.

Sunday I met err C #2 (never noticed they both had names that start with C) Anyway, I didn't want to go out with her, because I really wanted to concetrate on C, I think we have a real bond possible. But I did not want to just blow off C2, and since she lives about 45 minutes from me, I asked her to pick a place close to her home for us too meet. I wanted to explain to her, that I had met someone and that I couldn't date her again, but didn't want to do it on the phone, or via email, and I didn't want her to have to go way out of her way. So I drove up to her area, and met at the restauraunt. After we ordered, I explained the situation. She was very gracious and didn't try to make me feel worse than I already did about dumping her. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was really sad though.

My question is, did I do the right thing for C2? or would it have been better to have just told her over the phone? or is there some third option that I missed?

OH By the Way, Sunday night C and I got together again and spent the next 24 hours together talking and relaxing in each others presence and it looks like this is really something specail! I think MagiK has found some magic.

[NiceWorg]

Ya I think you did, buddy. You could have as well cancelled the second dates, or that´s what I would have done. But hey... it happens.

[Sazerac]

You're ALWAYS a jackass, MagiK! [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] (j/k)

Seriously, you did the right thing, man, by coming forward and letting the lady know in person what was up. It leaves no doubt in her mind as to the reason. If there was sadness, it was probably because she felt she was "too late", not because she was undesirable. But hey, man, congrats on the great "click" between you and the lady from the first night! Best wishes to both of you on that.

Oh, and kudos for following through in person, rather than calling and canceling. It shows a tremendous amount of respect for the person.

-Sazerac

[Angelousss]

girls appreciate honesty and the fact that you drove 45 min to go tell her. She proably wasn't happy w/ you but you did the best possible course of action for your situation. plus it was a blind date and a first date, she proably wasn't expecting much. I wouldn't have told i had setup 2 dates that weekend but meeting someone who you fell head over heals for she can understand

[Cloudbringer]

Hey, I think you did the right thing. I suppose it might have been less 'traumatic' if you'd called and explained it to her, but telling her in person was a very nice gesture!

I think Saz is right, the second lady was probably thinking she was sorry she missed her chance. [img]smile.gif[/img]

Thanks people, I really have an issue about hurting women, I hate to do it, and I always feel guilty if I have to see that look in her eyes, but I felt that the most honest thing I could do was at least face her and let her know. It isn't like we were talking about being lovers in the email, it was pretty casual, but I also did get the idea that she was really looking forward to meeting.

Edit: On a happy note [img]smile.gif[/img] I took a personal day, on Monday just so C and I could spend the whole day out enjoying the first sunny day in a while.

[ 11-19-2002, 11:22 AM: Message edited by: MagiK ]

[NiceWorg]

I wouldn´t want to nagger more about this, but maybe this lady saw some trouble for the evening/day, and it all came down so quickly.. so my opinion is that calling beforehand would've been a better thing to do, and explain everything in e-mail afterwards if necessary. In the end, it didn't do much profit to either.

There is the honesty factor, but it´s not that cold hearted to cancel things by phone if it saves so much trouble.

And just IMHO, of course.

??

[ 11-19-2002, 11:28 AM: Message edited by: NiceWorg ]

Originally posted by NiceWorg: I wouldn´t want to nagger more about this, but maybe this lady saw some trouble for the evening/day, and it all came down so quickly.. so my opinion is that calling beforehand would've been a better thing to do, and explain everything in e-mail afterwards if necessary. In the end, it didn't do much profit to either. There is the honesty factor, but it´s not that cold hearted to cancel things by phone if it saves so much trouble. And just IMHO, of course. ??

Not exactly sure what you mean here.
[img]smile.gif[/img] But I appreciate the response [img]smile.gif[/img]

[NiceWorg]

I mean like you said yourself she was really looking forward to that meeting.. and I´ve always thought that finding the truth out in the last minute is always worse than a little bit beforehand.. you know.

No don´t respect my replies, I seem to be the evil one in this case [img]smile.gif[/img]

Originally posted by NiceWorg: I mean like you said yourself she was really looking forward to that meeting.. and I´ve always thought that finding the truth out in the last minute is always worse than a little bit beforehand.. you know. No don´t respect my replies, I seem to be the evil one in this case [img]smile.gif[/img]

yeah, Im a baaad boy! thanks.

Edit: No wait! I ment YOU were a baaad boy

[ 11-19-2002, 11:39 AM: Message edited by: MagiK ]