Ye Olde Standup Night (Begins Now!)

[/)eathKiller]

Good Stuff, I give Callum a 8.27

After The judges have made their decisions it will be
The Comedic Stylings of Eugine The Intelectual Goblin!

SCORES SO FAR:

Callum -

Lord High Eater of Legs ___: 5.6
AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe ______: 3
/)eathkiller _____________: 6.27
SomeGuy ______________: 5

Avian Quellina (Killing Spree) -

Lord High Eater of Legs : 1.5
AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe ___:
/)eathkiller __________: 8.27
SomeGuy ___________: 6.0

[ 01-19-2003, 03:36 PM: Message edited by: /)eathKiller ]

[SomeGuy]

Sir Laughtalot laughes for awhile and holds up his sign saying.. 6.0

[DarkAngel]

form the back of the stage you can hear a rather large *bang* and walking out from the back of the stage emergise a huge orc. attempting not to be noticed by the audience who, lets face it are either drunk, bored or dead,(well maybe not, but im sure that jesus loving grannies time is up soon) he briskly walks towards the steps for the stage.

"My most humbly thankses....for youse...don there...who coms...to see..." the orcs brow contracts slightly, as he scratches the top of his head, trying to work out if his brain is there or not.

looking up he actually only just realises he is not behind the curtain anymore, and pulls an odd face, the kind you would see on a constipated donkey after being stung by three thousand killer bees.

"MR.......the funny mans"he sayd desperately. he looks at the audience as they clap, and opens his mouth slightly They likes me he thinks, well no , actually he conlcudes considering his brain mass is the size of a grain of rice.

he walks slowly towards the edge of the stage, and waves shyly, keeping his elbows stuck to the side of his waist. something rather sharp pokes him in the back, and he falls over. standing directly behind him is eugine with his cane, probing his back.

"ehem......good evening my dear....err...people" he looks towards the side of the stage where his act has been pencilled onto a piece of card. kicking the orc in the side, who rolls off the stage, he continues to address the crowd, squinting at his script.

"i am hon-ered to be joking here in my place today", by now the orc had returned to the side of the stage where he was holding up the script, and every now and again threw his head violently round the side of the stage, laughing and muttering. Eugine looked angrily towards the orc "you...didn't write my script did you?"

"yes...i makes you the funny man"

eugine looked down at his feet, holding his stomach. "OH....god im ruined" he looked at the restless crowd, whom all seemed to be rather...well restless ,and a sick feeling came over him.

the orc, who was rather insulted suddenly run onto the stage right behind eugine and kicked him. eugine went flying stragth into the side of the stage, and slowly slid down the wall.

the orc addressed the crowd [b]"i have some jokes"[b] he looked at the judges and smilled a huge grin or razor sharp teeth.

"whys did the monkey fall out of the tree?" the orc looked at the crowd, everyone was quiet.

"hey.. i resent that" out of front row of the crowd stepped a small drunk monkey, squieking at the orc.

"ok.s.....err.....whats did the cannibal dos after dumping his girlfriend""he err wiped his...oh i gives up" he slowly walked down the stage, straight into the pillar holding up the ceiling, some body laughed.

holding his head he ran straight into the other pillar, collapsing on the floor. a few more people (mainly) children laughed. he slowly rose to his feet, disorentated slightly by the fall, and stupidly stated "i'm oka..y"rather goofily before losng his footing, and fall down the stairs screaming. by this time security had been called, were attempting to drag him away from the stage.

[ 01-18-2003, 11:59 AM: Message edited by: DarkAngel ]

[/)eathKiller]

a judge snaps their fingers and cure critical wounds is cast on the goblin...

"on with the Skit!"

[Lord Starshadow]

Curuthir smiled as he heard Marl's joke and sketch. It was a curious joke, but did not impress the Half-Elf. Then again, Curuthir did not understand what the big fuss was about most comedy. He did shift into the form of a drum and played a quick rimshot for Marl's joke (surprising the two women near him), just to have something to do. No one else seemed to be paying much attention however, and he shifted back to himself.

Curuthir had no idea what to think of the goblin/orc duo that came next. While they were terribly unfunny at first, the Half-Elf did enjoy the orc's stumbling into the pillars and the goblin's flying into a wall. "Why did they attempt any spoken jokes? They should've skipped right to the funny stuff," he thought as he laughed.

[Lord High Eater of Legs]

ooc: /)eathkiller, the 1.5 was for Avian, I havn't posted the score for Callum yet
ic:The lord held up his sign, on it was written:

Callum:5.6

A throwing knife whizzed across the room, and struck the judge in the neck, he slumped down, straight away-dead.
A grubby looking boy walked through the door.
'That man is an imposter, and not a very good one, he doesn't look a thing like me.'
The boy looked around at the audience, judges, and bards, who were all staring at him.
'What?'
He walked up to the judges seats, stopping halfway as he saw someone he knew.
'Hi Skye' The young thief grinned, 'I see you're a bard'
He carried on to his seat, and sat down, after shoving the body off of the stage.

ooc:btw, this doesn't affect the scores I've given, as the real Khalraan wasn't there to see all the show [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[ 01-19-2003, 03:39 PM: Message edited by: Lord High Eater of Legs ]

[SomeGuy]

Sir Laughalot,slightly confsued by the latest skit and what happened to the first Khalran. He holds up a sign saying. " I give him whatever the dwarf gives him." Seeing as he does'nt know how to grade such a skit.

[ 01-19-2003, 03:49 PM: Message edited by: SomeGuy ]

[Skydracgrrl]

Skye grinned and waved at the boy, then rolled her eyes at Spree. "What'd he get pierced this time?" she asked, and leaned over. Spree whispered into her ear, a mischievious smile plastered on her face, and Skye started to giggle. Spotting Curuthir, she said to Spree "Maybe he should try Kuroshi's form, that'd be interesting," she laughed, and winked at the male half-elf, who was staring at them in obvious confusion.

[Tancred]

Far away in a small seat in the audience, a cheerful paladin in somewhat rusty armour munches his way through the last of a bag of popped corn grains. He turns to the glowing golden sword on the next seat, grinning.
"What do you think so far?"
"If I had my full powers and a body," states the sword, "I'd have burned this place to the ground and, having teleported that damn Bard to my secret sanctum, would even now be devising exquisite methods of torture involving the search for any kind of 'funny bone' in her body."
The paladin munches some more, still smiling and unfazed. "You know, Karnas, I think you have a talent for deadpan."
"You disgust me."
"The feeling's mutual, mage."

OOC: Posted this to the wrong thread! You can tell it's late, can't you...?

[Skydracgrrl]

ooc- lol, well i feel a little better now, knowing that Karnas doesnt want to tear Skye limb from limb very slowly [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]