OK, for a funny thread...post your most hilarious (TRUE) stories here

[Kinslayer]

Well, there's the one about when I needed to get a new passport done and my friend Dean had recently had his done as well. I mentioned that I needed to get a photo done to which he replied.

"I've still got two left from my passport it you want them".

The other amusing one involving myself is when I was getting "intimate" with a girl in the back of my car. The said car was parked at the back of a deserted car park next to a very busy main road under a tree. I thought this was a very discreet location and was quite pleased with myself. The only problem is that without realising we dislodged the hand brake and the car rolled across the car park without either of us noticing before stopping next to the main road. Much to my embarassment there was even a short mention of it in out local paper under the headline "Nude Exhibisionist's wanted for questioning" asking someone to turn us in to the law. Needless to say, I now keep a wheel clamp in the boot for future moments of passion.

[IdiotRogue]

I work in banking... a short while ago, a young newlywed couple came to me asking about obtaining a loan. Based on the amount they wanted to borrow, I suggested a loan, using their house as collateral (a gift from his parents - nice). They discussed improvements they wanted to make and i explained the difference between a home improvement loan and a home equity loan (with a home improvement, you need exact quotes and descriptions of the work to be done... home equity, you just get the amount requested and do not have to explain your expenditures - important distinction for this story).

Anyhow, I guess I gave these kids a little too much information. When they returned 2 weeks later, they had a thick folder. The first pages were the loan application. Amount requested: $36,000.00... Purpose: home improvements, breast enhancements and tattoo removal. What followed were doctor's reports, computer generated "before & after" pictures for the enhancements, polaroid pictures of someone's derrierre with a few tattoos and someone's attractive, normal sized breasts as well as bids from housing contractors.

I stood up, walked behind them and closed my office door, removed the application and contractor's bids and handed them back the rest of the folder. I then explained they wanted a home EQUITY loan as there was no way a court would allow a bank to file a "T & A" lien... They both blushed but I told them I would not breath a word (Great Googlie Mooglie!!! What if they're board members???).

In any event, they left my office... on the way out, the young lady began whipping the snot out of her mate, yelling at him, "you &*%@^#$ !!! I told you we should have asked for a home equity loan!!!"

Here endeth the tale



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{Next time I send some damned fool, I'll go myself...}

[Drake]

all so very funny LOL

I got one to tell. now I didn't hear of this until later but I died laughing anyway.
in the front of my old house in Texas there stands my older brother Tomas his friend Matt my other older brother Jeremy and this great looking woman they just met. Jeremy leaves(for some reason, I don't know) while they are intruducing them selves. well knowing who Matt and Tomas are she ask as Jeremy returns "and what do you call this guy?" well Jeremy for some reson thought she was asking who Matt was. so he steps forward and trying to be funny says "Dumb ass!"
I only wish I could have been there.

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Drake A.K.A. bocaj