I am an idiot. - Page 2

Bungleau · 07-23-2006, 10:07 PM

Reminds me a bit of the story of the hunter who accidentally hit a deer with his car. As he stood looking at the deer's body on someone's front lawn, the someone came up and thanked the hunter for giving him a deer.

"It's mine," said the hunter. "It hit my car."

"It's mine," said the landowner. "It's on my property."

With neither side budging (and neither side wanting to call the cops), the landowner finally suggested they solve it with back-home justice.

"What's that?" asked the hunter.

"That's where each of us kicks the other in the nads three times. Whoever's standing at the end can take the deer."

"Sounds good to me," said the hunter. "You first."

So the landowner gives him one hellacious kick in the groin. The hunter falls to his knees, then stands up, breathing very carefully.

Another kick, this one that lifted him two inches off the ground. He collapsed into a ball and got up a couple of minutes later, gasping for air with tears streaming down his face.

Third kick... I think something got launched into orbit. Five minutes until the hunter can take a breath, five more until he can get to his knees, and five more until he can stand.

"Okay," he wheezed, "My turn."

"Nah, you can have the deer," said the landowner, who turned around and walked into the house.

Yep... about as pointless and illogical... other than defending your valor. Hurts, don't it?

At least you won....

Illumina Drathiran'ar · 07-24-2006, 02:15 AM

Paging Dr. Darwin... Dr. Darwin, please pick up on line 3... [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Luther · 07-24-2006, 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by SomeGuy:
I have a story to tell, I grand story of cool things and whatnot.

When I was at church camp...

Sorry, your post stopped being 'cool' at this exact point...

[img]tongue.gif[/img]

Cloudbringer · 07-24-2006, 10:49 AM

SG...OUCH! You sure know how to take the painful dares, dont you?! I'm also wondering about the girls...cuz at your age if I'd seen a guy do what you did...I'm thinking I'd have walked away, wondering what he was drinking besides chlorinated pool water!

Bithron · 07-24-2006, 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Cloudbringer:
SG...OUCH! You sure know how to take the painful dares, dont you?! I'm also wondering about the girls...cuz at your age if I'd seen a guy do what you did...I'm thinking I'd have walked away, wondering what he was drinking besides chlorinated pool water!

Okay, that seriously made me laugh...

Cloudbringer · 07-24-2006, 01:18 PM

hehe [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

SomeGuy · 07-24-2006, 01:44 PM

It wasn't about impressing girls, that's the only reason I was at the pool in the first place. I was there to gawk at them. The belly flop thing was totally unexpected. Wasn't trying to impress any girls, I'm just stupid enough to let my pride get in the way of my personal well-being. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[ 07-24-2006, 01:46 PM: Message edited by: SomeGuy ]

07-23-2006, 10:07 PM	#11
Bungleau 40th Level Warrior Join Date: October 29, 2001 Location: Western Wilds of Michigan Posts: 11,752	Reminds me a bit of the story of the hunter who accidentally hit a deer with his car. As he stood looking at the deer's body on someone's front lawn, the someone came up and thanked the hunter for giving him a deer. "It's mine," said the hunter. "It hit my car." "It's mine," said the landowner. "It's on my property." With neither side budging (and neither side wanting to call the cops), the landowner finally suggested they solve it with back-home justice. "What's that?" asked the hunter. "That's where each of us kicks the other in the nads three times. Whoever's standing at the end can take the deer." "Sounds good to me," said the hunter. "You first." So the landowner gives him one hellacious kick in the groin. The hunter falls to his knees, then stands up, breathing very carefully. Another kick, this one that lifted him two inches off the ground. He collapsed into a ball and got up a couple of minutes later, gasping for air with tears streaming down his face. Third kick... I think something got launched into orbit. Five minutes until the hunter can take a breath, five more until he can get to his knees, and five more until he can stand. "Okay," he wheezed, "My turn." "Nah, you can have the deer," said the landowner, who turned around and walked into the house. Yep... about as pointless and illogical... other than defending your valor. Hurts, don't it? At least you won.... __________________ B Save Early, Save Often Save Before, Save After Two-Star General, Spelling Soldiers -+-+-+ Give 'em a hug one more time. It might be the last.

07-24-2006, 02:15 AM	#12
Illumina Drathiran'ar Apophis Join Date: July 10, 2002 Location: I can see the Manhattan skyline from my window. Age: 39 Posts: 4,673	Paging Dr. Darwin... Dr. Darwin, please pick up on line 3... [img]tongue.gif[/img] __________________ http://cavestory.org PLAY THIS GAME. Seriously. http://xkcd.com/386/ http://www.xkcd.com/406/ My heart is like my coffee. Black, bitter, icy, and with a straw.

07-24-2006, 10:49 AM	#14
Cloudbringer Ironworks Moderator Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Upstate NY USA Posts: 19,737	SG...OUCH! You sure know how to take the painful dares, dont you?! I'm also wondering about the girls...cuz at your age if I'd seen a guy do what you did...I'm thinking I'd have walked away, wondering what he was drinking besides chlorinated pool water! __________________ "Don't take life for granted." Animal (may he rest in peace)

07-24-2006, 01:18 PM	#16
Cloudbringer Ironworks Moderator Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Upstate NY USA Posts: 19,737	hehe [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] __________________ "Don't take life for granted." Animal (may he rest in peace)

07-24-2006, 01:44 PM	#17
SomeGuy Unicorn Join Date: May 14, 2002 Location: Oklahoma, USA Age: 34 Posts: 4,238	It wasn't about impressing girls, that's the only reason I was at the pool in the first place. I was there to gawk at them. The belly flop thing was totally unexpected. Wasn't trying to impress any girls, I'm just stupid enough to let my pride get in the way of my personal well-being. [img]tongue.gif[/img] [ 07-24-2006, 01:46 PM: Message edited by: SomeGuy ] __________________ \"I firmly believe that any man\'s finest hour, the greatest fulfillment of all that he holds dear, is the moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle - victorious.\"<br />-Vince Lombardi

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