I am so boiling mad right now I could KILL!!!

[John D Harris]

Saz,
Rant and rave here get it out of your system here with us, don't let your anger control you. If you let your anger get you and smoke this person that desperatly needs it, sooner or later you'll calm down then thunk about it and relize there could of been another way to handle the situation and end up regreting your actions. (BEEN THERE DONE THAT It's not fun).
John D.

[Cerek the Barbaric]

Saz - I am firmly in your corner on this one. I have had colleagues and subordinates alike tell bald-faced lies about me also at work. One incident very nearly cost me my job - until I told my boss that if he didn't like the job I was doing, he could get somebody else. Once I stood up for myself, he gained a measure of respect for me.

Yorick - I love ya brother, but there is NO WAY the director "mis-interpreted" the girl saying that Saz "had 20 other students in front of her". Like the others said, her ego got hurt when he wouldn't stop his lecture to attend to her question. Rather than actually "wait her turn", she decided to cause Saz some seriously unnecessary grief. She deliberately tried to get him in trouble with his boss. Sorry, but I agree with him coming down on her with both feet.

quietman - Saz never said he was going to "smoke her" in public. That would be stupid and could get him into trouble. I'm sure it will be a private teacher-student conference.

One last word of advice Saz. It IS a good idea to wait until you have completely calmed down from the incident before speaking with her. That way, you can plan what you are going to say and you can also make sure you don't "spout off" something you will later regret in the heat of the moment.

Remember the IronWorks Mantra - argue the point, not the person.

It's also a good idea to wait until after the directer has had her talk with the girl. Getting reprimanded by the person she tried to "tattle" to should have a pretty shocking effect on her and may make her realize her antics will not be tolerated in the future. Still, it won't hurt to reinforce what the director says and to let her know her grade will suffer greatly if she pulls such a sophomoric stunt again.

OH - and you have my MSN ID - I'll be happy to listen to your "un-edited" rant if you still need to "vent" a little.

[Attalus]

I know, Saz, being lied about is no fun. I sometimes have patients complain to my staff about things that I have not done. But, I agree, it's best to be cool and professional, so you will have nothing to be ashamed of. Revenge is a dish best eaten cold, as my wife is prone to say.

[Cloudbringer]

Hey Paris! I'll log on tonight if I get a chance- busy day for me, but email and pm work. [img]smile.gif[/img]

You know I work in a school so I see that sort of thing on a daily basis. Student gets ticked off at not getting into a class so he lies about the instructor and says she was skipping him in favor of underclassmen when she gave permissions to others to get into a closed class. The actual truth? Student was last one to ask in a series of 10 and the instructor only had 6 seats left.

I've seen a lot worse and some just like what you've described. Students come to tell our chairman all kinds of sob stories that just don't wash in the light of day. In the end, it's the student who loses when they do that. They have no credibility and it's obvious you care about the situation because you inquired about it.

I'd suggest a quiet dressing down of the girl. Let her know in a few short sentences, that you give ALL your students equal billing and she has no more right to interrupt another than they have to keep you from helping her during HER study time. Let her know that if she is going to expect special treatment, and lie about the situation you certainly wouldn't wish to teach her one on one again. Quietly but very firmly said, this should make an impact on her. It says you caught the lie, didn't approve and won't abide such behavior in the future.

I know you are angry, and I fully understand that! But right now, getting really angry WITH that student when talking to her will only give her more ammo if she wants to escalate the problem. Everyone knows she lied and your boss is going to make sure the student is reprimanded. I think THAT is saying alot to any kid who thinks lying and going over your head is the way to get what they want.

Many hugs, my friend. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Sazerac]

Guys, thanks for all your advice. I am much calmer now. No, I wouldn't have smoked her in public, although it was a temptation I could ill-afford to do. What I have done is this:

* - lodge a formal complaint against her to the administration of the school

* - request that another teacher be assigned to work with her to complete this class since this incident raises "irreconcilable issues" between us.

Just a little more background: this is NOT the first time this student has tried this with a teacher. It's the last time she'll try it with this one. They're actually talking a suspension, if not completely removing her from school. This is a vo-tech school, and the person is around 25 years of age, so she is no teenager, and should certainly have known better. We certainly have bent over backwards with her regarding her drunken binges and parties she throws and can't come to class the day after. This person is BAD NEWS from the word "go." She's upset the apple cart this time for the last time. I'll see to that.

Thanks, and hugs,
-Sazerac

[Kaltia]

That's brilliant, Sazerac! We have kids sort of like that at my school-been kept back a year or two because they're too lazy, and this incldes an eighteen year old in a bunch of 15/16s...so big and admirable-yeah right. She throws parties randomly, can't be bothered to turn up for lessons that involve thinking, and it looks like she'll be a nineteen year old in a class of fourteen-fifteen year olds.
Her parents must be so proud!

Needless to say, the approach you've decided to take you scare the $h*t out of me if I'd done something like that [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img] Keep on rollin', dude [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[Cloudbringer]

Yikes, sounds like she does want something like suspension to make her sit up and take notice. Good for you!

[Ronn_Bman]

Originally posted by The Hunter of Jahanna: good to see you cary around that big ax for more than just looks, Saz. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

I have signature axe envy SAZ!

[Melusine]

Awww Saz, I'm sorry to hear this... it's awful when people make up lies about you.

I'm glad to hear you've cooled down a little though I fully understand why you got angry. Especially after reading your second post.. she sounds like she really needs a good talking to! Good luck with it Paris!! *hugs*

[Epona]

Paris, that's just the kind of stress you don't need at the moment. Glad you're feeling calmer now [img]smile.gif[/img]

IMO there are plenty of people who haven't learned that you catch more flies with honey than vinegar (or whatever the saying is LOL, I'm crap at remembering stuff like that!) What she should have done was waited outside til you were finished, then asked you nicely when it would be a convenient time for you to talk about the issue with her - in which case I suspect you would have fitted her in as soon as possible and you would both have been satisfied with that arrangement. I can't imagine the sheer lack of social graces and manners that it would take for someone to actually interrupt a lecture! Let alone to then go and complain and lie about it. I blame the parents LOL

Sounds like she's getting what she deserves.

EDITING to add that I think sounding off at her about it would be the worst thing you could do - people like this are generally attention seeking, have learned that negative attention is better than no attention (hence their behaviour), and in that sense you'd be rewarding her efforts by giving her a telling off. Let your boss deal with it [img]smile.gif[/img]

[ 02-12-2003, 03:44 PM: Message edited by: Epona ]