Ten reasons God created women

Zidane · 11-07-2002, 03:16 PM

10. God worried that Adam would be lost in the Garden of Eden because he wouldn't ask for directions.

9. God knew that someday Adam would need someone to hand him the TV remote. (Parenthetically, it has been noted that men don't want to see what's ON tv, they want to see WHAT ELSE is on.)

8. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor's appointment.

7. God knew that when Adam's fig leaf wore out, he wouldn't buy a new one.

6. God knew that Adam would not remember to take out the garbage.

5. God wanted man to be fruitful and multiply, but he knew Adam would never be able to handle labour pains and childbirth.

4. As "keeper of the garden," Adam would need help in finding his tools.

3. Adam needed someone to blame for the Apple Incident, and for anything else that was really his fault.

2. As the Bible says: "It is not good for man to be alone."

1. And the No. 1 reason of all [Tada, drum roll, fanfare, etc.] God stepped back, looked at Adam, and declared: "I can do better than that."

Hehehehe LZ

DJG · 11-07-2002, 03:20 PM

LOL!

I thought this would be a thread slagging of women, not men!!!!

Either way, it is hilarious!

T/-/alali · 11-07-2002, 03:28 PM

LOL. See how lazy we can be.

Mack_Attack · 11-07-2002, 03:40 PM

Very cool I liked that one.

It is true I would never buy a new fig leaf. I like the one with holes.

Thoran · 11-07-2002, 03:44 PM

10. God worried that Eve would be lost in the Garden of Eden because she couldn't read the map.

9. God knew that Adam needed someone to lose the remote in a seat cushion every 15 minutes.

8. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor's appointment every time he got a sniffle, felt a twinge in his big toe, thought maybe he was retaining too much water, decided that caffine was giving him heart palpitations and panic attacks, or was sure that he had a brain tumor.

7. God knew that without eve nagging him to put some clothes on... he would realize that he doesn't actually NEED to wear that fig leaf... and the whole fig leaf industry would collapse.

6. God knew that Adam would need someone who was too whimpy to take out the garbage herself.

5. God wanted man to be fruitful and multiply, but he needed Eve around with her constant headaches... in order to avoid overpopulation.

4. As "keeper of the garden," Adam would need someone to blow his gardener salary on shoes and bingo, all the while berating him for not getting that "chief gardener" position yet.

3. Adam needed someone to complain that the apple he got her wasn't as nice as the apple the neighbor got for his wife.

2. As the Bible says: "It is not good for man to be alone, because then he might be happy, and we can't have that."

1. And the No. 1 reason of all [Tada, drum roll, fanfare, etc.] God stepped back, looked at Adam, and declared: "Like the humans I've created, even I can mess up a good thing."

I have issues with stereotypical sexist jokes, and while I don't take issue with peoples right to post them, I feel compelled to show the other side how nasty they sound when their directed at you. (kindof like Cartman and the Sailing Away song) [img]smile.gif[/img]

[ 11-07-2002, 03:48 PM: Message edited by: Thoran ]

Vaskez · 11-07-2002, 03:47 PM

Hehehehe

Ar-Cunin · 11-07-2002, 03:50 PM

Nice one(s) Thoran [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

11-07-2002, 03:16 PM	#1
Zidane Manshoon Join Date: January 27, 2002 Location: Birmingham, England Age: 68 Posts: 241	10. God worried that Adam would be lost in the Garden of Eden because he wouldn't ask for directions. 9. God knew that someday Adam would need someone to hand him the TV remote. (Parenthetically, it has been noted that men don't want to see what's ON tv, they want to see WHAT ELSE is on.) 8. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor's appointment. 7. God knew that when Adam's fig leaf wore out, he wouldn't buy a new one. 6. God knew that Adam would not remember to take out the garbage. 5. God wanted man to be fruitful and multiply, but he knew Adam would never be able to handle labour pains and childbirth. 4. As "keeper of the garden," Adam would need help in finding his tools. 3. Adam needed someone to blame for the Apple Incident, and for anything else that was really his fault. 2. As the Bible says: "It is not good for man to be alone." 1. And the No. 1 reason of all [Tada, drum roll, fanfare, etc.] God stepped back, looked at Adam, and declared: "I can do better than that." Hehehehe LZ __________________ <br /><br />You know what thought did? He only thought he did.

11-07-2002, 03:28 PM	#3
T/-/alali Baaz Draconian Join Date: September 8, 2002 Location: Cornelius,NC Age: 37 Posts: 700	LOL. See how lazy we can be. __________________ I am the Ferret king, master of the hordes, allied to Someguy\'s mighty pinguins, we will soon rule the world!

11-07-2002, 03:40 PM	#4
Mack_Attack Osiris - Egyptian God of the Underworld Join Date: May 22, 2001 Location: Sherwoodpark,Alberta,Canada Age: 52 Posts: 2,929	Very cool I liked that one. It is true I would never buy a new fig leaf. I like the one with holes. __________________

11-07-2002, 03:47 PM	#6
Vaskez Takhisis Follower Join Date: April 30, 2001 Location: szép Magyarország (well not right now) Posts: 5,089	Hehehehe __________________ Too set in his ways to ever relate If he could set that aside, there'd be heaven to pay But weathered and aged, time swept him to grave Love conquers all? Damn, I'd say that area's gray

11-07-2002, 03:50 PM	#7
Ar-Cunin Ra Join Date: August 14, 2001 Location: Copenhagen, Denmark Age: 53 Posts: 2,326	Nice one(s) Thoran [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] __________________ Life is a laugh <img border=\"0\" alt=\"[biglaugh]\" title=\"\" src=\"graemlins/biglaugh.gif\" /> - and DEATH is the final joke <img border=\"0\" alt=\"[hehe]\" title=\"\" src=\"graemlins/hehe.gif\" />

11-07-2002, 03:20 PM	#2
DJG Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 16, 2001 Location: Manchester, England Age: 36 Posts: 1,109	LOL! I thought this would be a thread slagging of women, not men!!!! Either way, it is hilarious!

11-07-2002, 03:44 PM	#5
Thoran Galvatron Join Date: January 10, 2002 Location: Upstate NY Age: 57 Posts: 2,109	10. God worried that Eve would be lost in the Garden of Eden because she couldn't read the map. 9. God knew that Adam needed someone to lose the remote in a seat cushion every 15 minutes. 8. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor's appointment every time he got a sniffle, felt a twinge in his big toe, thought maybe he was retaining too much water, decided that caffine was giving him heart palpitations and panic attacks, or was sure that he had a brain tumor. 7. God knew that without eve nagging him to put some clothes on... he would realize that he doesn't actually NEED to wear that fig leaf... and the whole fig leaf industry would collapse. 6. God knew that Adam would need someone who was too whimpy to take out the garbage herself. 5. God wanted man to be fruitful and multiply, but he needed Eve around with her constant headaches... in order to avoid overpopulation. 4. As "keeper of the garden," Adam would need someone to blow his gardener salary on shoes and bingo, all the while berating him for not getting that "chief gardener" position yet. 3. Adam needed someone to complain that the apple he got her wasn't as nice as the apple the neighbor got for his wife. 2. As the Bible says: "It is not good for man to be alone, because then he might be happy, and we can't have that." 1. And the No. 1 reason of all [Tada, drum roll, fanfare, etc.] God stepped back, looked at Adam, and declared: "Like the humans I've created, even I can mess up a good thing." I have issues with stereotypical sexist jokes, and while I don't take issue with peoples right to post them, I feel compelled to show the other side how nasty they sound when their directed at you. (kindof like Cartman and the Sailing Away song) [img]smile.gif[/img] [ 11-07-2002, 03:48 PM: Message edited by: Thoran ]

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