Combat for Dummies

[ZFR]

Advice and instructions taken from actual military sources. Some of these guys must have had a sense of humor

"Aim towards the enemy."
--Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
--U.S. Marine Corps

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
--USAF Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
--Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
--Army's magazine of prevention maintenance

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
--U.S. Air Force manual

"Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo."
--Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways."
--U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
--Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
--David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
--Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
--Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper....once."
--Anon

"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."
--Unknown Marine Recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
--Infantry Journal

"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
--USAF Ammo Troop

[mad=dog]

Well some of this seems more redundant and idiotic than it really is. Some dispensible rocket-launchers are near symmetric. Nevertheless an untrained person attempting to fire it in the heat of combat won't have time for cozy reading. I believe there is a warning for backblast too, which can be equally deadly and unexpected unless you know it.
As for the advice regarding range and drawing fire. Stand and shoot combat is dreadful to an infantry unit precisely because you cannot give fire without having fire returned. This develops into set-piece actions where detachments advance under covering fire from concealed elements. Personel in advancing groups/platoons should avoid fire at all costs until they reach a point of cover (where they can cover the elements who were left behind for their own cover). When this advice is taken out of context it looks silly, but it really is what keeps a footsoldier alive and fighting.
For reference I have never been in combat myself - I have merely recieved basic infantry training.

Loved this one:
"A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
Perfect gloomy black humour.

[dizzy]

hehe well i have been in combat and a lot of the training we recieves sounds like this lol. i loved these. we are americas best lol.

[ 06-20-2005, 01:52 PM: Message edited by: dizzy ]

[Aragorn1]

"If it moves, shoot it, if it doesn't move, shoot it just in case"

Originally posted by ZFR: "If the enemy is in range, so are you." --Infantry Journal

Surely, this would depend on the weapons they are using?

[ 06-20-2005, 02:09 PM: Message edited by: Aragorn1 ]

[Bungleau]

Originally posted by Aragorn1: "If it moves, shoot it, if it doesn't move, shoot it just in case" quote: Originally posted by ZFR: "If the enemy is in range, so are you." --Infantry Journal

Surely, this would depend on the weapons they are using? [/QUOTE]Do you want to assume they're using more or less weapon than you are? In any case, you go first.

[Ladyzekke]

This one was my favorite:

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
--U.S. Marine Corps

[Cloudbringer]

I can see this one.. LOL

"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
--USAF Ammo Troop

[Sir Goulum]

Originally posted by ZFR: "Aim towards the enemy." --Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher

Makes sense. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[Bungleau]

Originally posted by Cloudbringer: I can see this one.. LOL "If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him." --USAF Ammo Troop

There's an old joke built on this one...

Two gas company meter readers are our doing their job, reading meters and recording usage at each house they go to. Lunch is approaching, and one suggests to the other that they race back to the truck, and the loser buys lunch.

They start running and get to the truck when they hear more footsteps and panting. Turning around, they see one of the people from the house they just left running after them.

They asked what she was doing, and she said that when she saw two gas company guys running away from the house at full speed, she figured they knew something she didn't, and that she'd better catch up.

[mad=dog]

In the old days there were artillery pieces where you inserted the shell and charge seperately. I recall a cartoon reprint where an angry arty sergeant is pointing at a stack of shells shouting at the helpless gunners "Where the h*ll is my thermo?"