Why is it so hard to walk away?

AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe · 10-05-2002, 06:15 PM

I mean you know the relationship is over and even if it wasn't its not going anywhere, So you know you have to end it, but that last step is so hard. When you have all the right reasons why is it still so hard to walk away?

[ 10-05-2002, 06:15 PM: Message edited by: AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe ]

Mack_Attack · 10-05-2002, 06:19 PM

Well the longer the time that you spend with some the harder it is. You but so much of your time into your relationship. I think you always think that it will work it self out. Maybe if you can not walk away there could be a chance to make it work. maybe I do not have a clue been with the same person over 10 years now.

10-05-2002, 08:17 PM

I know what you mean, I was going out with a girl for nearly 2 years and it was almost unbearable when we split. Well for me anyway, she found another guy! [img]graemlins/1disgust.gif[/img]

edit: spelling

[ 10-05-2002, 08:19 PM: Message edited by: Deathbringer ]

Attalus · 10-05-2002, 08:29 PM

Of course it's hard. All of life's irrrevocable decisions are hard. I still remember sitting in my batchelor apartment, two months after I walked out on my first wife, and bawling like a baby. Ididn't even like her any more, and wouldn't have gone back under any consideration, but still, I was sad. It's human nature to mourn whatever you had in that relationship, and to avoid the unpleasantness of a breakup. It can't be sugar-coated. I read once when the French actor Alain Delon moved out on Romy Schneider, he just left a single rose, and a note that said, "Romy, I'm sorry." I told my nurse that one time, and she retorted, "If I'd been her, I'd have hunted him down and killed him." So, there are some good points in letting them have their say. Sorrry that you have to go through it, man.

Azred · 10-05-2002, 09:25 PM

Unlike Attalus, when I left my last disaster I had a really good time! The freedom was like a breath of fresh air. [img]graemlins/awesomework.gif[/img]

Anyway...why do many people find it so hard to walk away? Because we cling to the hope that if we stay then everything can be worked out and the future will be so bright.

If your relationship is bad, then you can either change yourself or change your surroundings. If you change yourself and the relationship doesn't improve, then your partner doesn't want a better life--walk away. It's that simple.

Charean · 10-06-2002, 12:02 PM

It is hard to leave because you have a connection with that person.

Severing connections is hard.

I find that there is a way to look at it. Will there be more pain if you stay, or go?

Sometimes you have to. And then it doesn't take as long as you think to rebuild. But you have to find out who you are again, because you have changed in the relationship.

DJG · 10-06-2002, 05:10 PM

A have a girlfriend.......

It has been hard. She seems very rebellious, but however she falls out with me and then she is the first one to make up. It seems she makes the most mistakes and then is always the first to make up.

I don't know whether I love her.

How can I tell????

T/-/alali · 10-06-2002, 06:58 PM

The longer you've spent time with the person the harder it is to let go.

Sir Kenyth · 10-07-2002, 11:49 AM

The same reason folks hold on to bad investments until they're worthless. You irrationally don't want to beleive it was wasted time/money and hang on in the foolish hope that it will recover and be what it once was. In the process of denial, you wind up losing everything. The ability to walk away from something before it makes a mess of you is one of the most valuable skills you'll ever develop.

Horatio · 10-07-2002, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by DJG:
A have a girlfriend.......

It has been hard. She seems very rebellious, but however she falls out with me and then she is the first one to make up. It seems she makes the most mistakes and then is always the first to make up.

I don't know whether I love her.

How can I tell????

You love her when she hugs you without reaching for your wallet

[img]tongue.gif[/img]
Walking away IS hard, but then nearly everything in lief is. Sucks, I know, but I don't make the rules, I only wish I do

10-05-2002, 06:15 PM	#1
AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe Hathor Join Date: October 11, 2001 Location: At My Computer Age: 44 Posts: 2,217	I mean you know the relationship is over and even if it wasn't its not going anywhere, So you know you have to end it, but that last step is so hard. When you have all the right reasons why is it still so hard to walk away? [ 10-05-2002, 06:15 PM: Message edited by: AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe ] __________________ Now the swinging bridge<br />Is quieted with creepers. . . <br />Like our tendrilled life. -Basho

10-05-2002, 06:19 PM	#2
Mack_Attack Osiris - Egyptian God of the Underworld Join Date: May 22, 2001 Location: Sherwoodpark,Alberta,Canada Age: 52 Posts: 2,929	Well the longer the time that you spend with some the harder it is. You but so much of your time into your relationship. I think you always think that it will work it self out. Maybe if you can not walk away there could be a chance to make it work. maybe I do not have a clue been with the same person over 10 years now. __________________

10-05-2002, 09:25 PM	#5
Azred Drow Priestess Join Date: March 13, 2001 Location: a hidden sanctorum high above the metroplex Age: 55 Posts: 4,037	Unlike Attalus, when I left my last disaster I had a really good time! The freedom was like a breath of fresh air. [img]graemlins/awesomework.gif[/img] Anyway...why do many people find it so hard to walk away? Because we cling to the hope that if we stay then everything can be worked out and the future will be so bright. If your relationship is bad, then you can either change yourself or change your surroundings. If you change yourself and the relationship doesn't improve, then your partner doesn't want a better life--walk away. It's that simple. __________________ Everything may be explained by a conspiracy theory. All conspiracy theories are true. No matter how thinly you slice it, it's still bologna.

10-06-2002, 12:02 PM	#6
Charean Hathor Join Date: March 6, 2001 Location: Waxahachie, TX Age: 61 Posts: 2,201	It is hard to leave because you have a connection with that person. Severing connections is hard. I find that there is a way to look at it. Will there be more pain if you stay, or go? Sometimes you have to. And then it doesn't take as long as you think to rebuild. But you have to find out who you are again, because you have changed in the relationship. __________________ And then there were 6.

10-06-2002, 06:58 PM	#8
T/-/alali Baaz Draconian Join Date: September 8, 2002 Location: Cornelius,NC Age: 37 Posts: 700	The longer you've spent time with the person the harder it is to let go. __________________ I am the Ferret king, master of the hordes, allied to Someguy\'s mighty pinguins, we will soon rule the world!

10-05-2002, 08:17 PM	#3
Deathbringer Guest Posts: n/a	I know what you mean, I was going out with a girl for nearly 2 years and it was almost unbearable when we split. Well for me anyway, she found another guy! [img]graemlins/1disgust.gif[/img] edit: spelling [ 10-05-2002, 08:19 PM: Message edited by: Deathbringer ]

10-05-2002, 08:29 PM	#4
Attalus Symbol of Bane Join Date: November 26, 2001 Location: Texas Age: 76 Posts: 8,167	Of course it's hard. All of life's irrrevocable decisions are hard. I still remember sitting in my batchelor apartment, two months after I walked out on my first wife, and bawling like a baby. Ididn't even like her any more, and wouldn't have gone back under any consideration, but still, I was sad. It's human nature to mourn whatever you had in that relationship, and to avoid the unpleasantness of a breakup. It can't be sugar-coated. I read once when the French actor Alain Delon moved out on Romy Schneider, he just left a single rose, and a note that said, "Romy, I'm sorry." I told my nurse that one time, and she retorted, "If I'd been her, I'd have hunted him down and killed him." So, there are some good points in letting them have their say. Sorrry that you have to go through it, man.

10-06-2002, 05:10 PM	#7
DJG Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 16, 2001 Location: Manchester, England Age: 36 Posts: 1,109	A have a girlfriend....... It has been hard. She seems very rebellious, but however she falls out with me and then she is the first one to make up. It seems she makes the most mistakes and then is always the first to make up. I don't know whether I love her. How can I tell????

10-07-2002, 11:49 AM	#9
Sir Kenyth Fzoul Chembryl Join Date: August 30, 2001 Location: somewhere Age: 55 Posts: 1,785	The same reason folks hold on to bad investments until they're worthless. You irrationally don't want to beleive it was wasted time/money and hang on in the foolish hope that it will recover and be what it once was. In the process of denial, you wind up losing everything. The ability to walk away from something before it makes a mess of you is one of the most valuable skills you'll ever develop. __________________ Master Barbsman and wielder of the razor wit!<br /><br />There are dark angels among us. They present themselves in shining raiment but there is, in their hearts, the blackness of the abyss.

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