Hangover rating system. Where will you sit?

[Mack_Attack]

With the weekend upon us I thought it would be nice to have a rating system for some of the hangovers that will be out there. I feel some people may have to make a 6 star rating system. No names going to be mentioned. Rember play safe and have fun. [img]graemlins/cheers.gif[/img]

The One Star Hangover (*)
No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function relatively
well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 5 sodas and still feel
this way. For some reason, your are craving a philly sub and steak fries.

The Two Star Hangover (**)
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay but you have
the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging [img]graemlins/goodmorning.gif[/img] is only
increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the fruity
pancake from the 3:00 AM Waffle House excursion. There is some definite
havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.

The Three Star Hangover (***)
Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not productive.
Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the
flavored schnapp's shot s your alcoholic friends dared you to drink. Life
would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching Lucy reruns.
You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a diet Coke yet you haven't peed once.

The Four Star Hangover (****)
Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. You can't speak too quickly or else you
might puke. [img]graemlins/1puke.gif[/img] Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. [img]graemlins/5bloodymurder.gif[/img] You wore nice clothes, but that can't
hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face. (for the ladies,
it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars.) Your
eyes look like one big red vein and even your hair hurts. Your sphincter is
in perpetual spasm, and the first of about five craps you take during the
day makes the eyes water of everyone who enters the bathroom. [img]graemlins/fart.gif[/img]

The Five Star Hangover, (*****)
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the
employee who sits in the next cube. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every pore
and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your
mouth from brushing your teeth in an attempt to get the remnants of the poop
fairy out. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva so your tongue
is suffocating you. You don't have the foggiest idea who the hell the
stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to defecate
results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare
'floater' thrown in. The sole purpose of this 'floater' seems to be to
splash the toilet water all over your a$$. Death sounds pretty good about
right now.....

[realbinky]

you said 6 star, does 6 = coma? or 0 = not drinking yet?

I'm usually 2-3.

[Mack_Attack]

Originally posted by realbinky: you said 6 star, does 6 = coma? or 0 = not drinking yet? I'm usually 2-3.

2 or 3 is a good spot to be.

[purre]

Hmmm...always 2-3,no matter what

[Sio]

3-4
Not had a 5...yet!

[Dreamer128]

Originally posted by purre: Hmmm...always 2-3,no matter what

Same here...

[Attalus]

I don't have hangovers any more. My body now considers alcohol a food group.

[Thoran]

This is opening weekend of deer camp (or as I tend to call it... BEER Camp)... I will try to be strong, but it's possible that it will not be pretty. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[johnny]

Hangovers are easy to deal with. Whenever i feel something that i shouldn't feel after a night of drinking, i drink a few beers and all is well again. Simple, but oh so effective. So no bad headaches here.

[antryg]

Since I only drink alcohol once every year or so these days, I guess that I'm a judge and not a player.
However whenever my underage employees come in hung over I always manage to find bags or plants that need to be picked up and moved. I use my own rating system based on the color of green they turn or distance in projectile vomiting. [img]graemlins/1puke.gif[/img]