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Old 05-08-2002, 11:21 AM   #1
Avatar
Vampire
 

Join Date: April 28, 2001
Location: Cambridge
Age: 40
Posts: 3,877

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed
> a slow down in the performance of the flower and jewellery applications
that
> had operated flawlessly under the Boyfriend 5.0 system.
> > > >> >
> In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
> such as
> Romance 9.9, but installed undesirable programs such as Premier
> league 7.4, Sky Sports 3.2 and UEFA Cup 4.1. Conversation 8.0 also no
longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
>
> I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no
> avail.
>
> What can I do?
>
> Signed, Desperate.
> > > >> >
> > > >> >
> Dear Desperate,
> > > >> >
> First, keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 was an entertainment
> package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the
command:
> C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should
> then automatically run the applications: Guilt 3.3 and Flowers 7.5.
> But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to such
> background applications as Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer
6.1.
> Please remember that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will
> create Snoring Loudly.WAV files.
>
> DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend
> program.
> These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
> It could also potentially cause Husband 1.0 to default to the
> program:
> Girlfriend 9.2, which runs in the background and has been known to
> introduce potentially serious viruses into the Operating System.
> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a
> limited memory and can't learn new applications quickly. You might
consider buying additional software to enhance his system performance. I
personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Single Malt Scotch 4.5 combined with
such applications as Boob Job 3.6D and that old standby...Lingerie 6.9
> (which have both been credited with improved performance of his
hardware).
>
> Good Luck,
> > > >> >
> Tech Support
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Old 05-08-2002, 11:23 AM   #2
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
[img]smile.gif[/img] I've seen that one going around for a few years now, but it is funny. [img]graemlins/laugh2.gif[/img]

Cloudy, looking at the upgrades
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Old 05-08-2002, 02:44 PM   #3
Horatio
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
 

Join Date: September 19, 2001
Location: Behind these metal bars
Age: 41
Posts: 3,117
Yes, I have also seen that before. Still, nice to see again, and I have taken the time to email it to EVERYONE on my adress list.
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Old 05-08-2002, 04:20 PM   #4
Lanthir
Drizzt Do'Urden
 

Join Date: April 3, 2002
Location: West Palm Beach
Age: 43
Posts: 612
First time for me to see it LMFAO
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Old 05-08-2002, 04:21 PM   #5
Beaumanoir
Iron Throne Cult
 

Join Date: June 3, 2001
Location: There is no IRL, Only AFK.
Age: 35
Posts: 4,896
LOL!

Not The First Time, But Still Makes Me Chuckle!!!
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Old 05-08-2002, 05:04 PM   #6
Redblueflare
Galvatron
 

Join Date: May 9, 2001
Location: The backwoods in Georgia *sigh*
Age: 39
Posts: 2,151
LMAO! I'll remember to let Mr. Boswell read this tommorow so he'll allow me more IW time!
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Old 05-08-2002, 06:49 PM   #7
Tiamat
Banned User
 

Join Date: October 6, 2001
Location: In Abyss
Posts: 1,181
I am still using the Single-ICP Loving program. I have been called sexy in da past tho.... *by girls thank goodness* Its a good booster to my Pale and Wears black 3.4!
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