How to properly and respectfully address a lady in (American) English ?

[Lord of Alcohol]

I use ma'am on anyone I percieve to be around my age or older, miss for the other hlaf. Havent been scolded by the ma'am police yet As for sir I hate being called that but...find myself using it too. Oh well

[Diogenes Of Pumpkintown]

Originally posted by Ramon de Ramon y Ramon: Of course, this has been the most useful and most appealing suggestion up to now - by far !

A pleasure to be of service

[MILAMBER]

Originally posted by Ramon de Ramon y Ramon: Thank you very much, guys ! But if I had to draw a conclusion from what you have said already now it would be that I should just keep using "ma'am". Well, why not, I kind of like it anyway. I don't agree that "Miss" is a "one-fits-all" solution: after all if you decide to be formal you should do it right, so that it applies only to unmarried women. And besides, calling a 40 or 50- year-old unmarried lady "Miss" just would appear mightily awkward and as very outdated to me - even if she should be vain enough to feel flattered by it.

You're probably right. I think a lot of it is delivery too, but from a technical standpoint, you're probably right.


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"The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his."
-General George Patton (1885-1945)

Member of CLAN HADB

[The_ Fur_Cough]

More beer wench.........please.

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Aaahh.... Fur Cough.

[Ladyzekke]

Howbout "Honey" Ramon... Just kidding!

Actually "ma'am" to me I feel like something a person uses to address an older lady, "miss" for a younger lady. But then again "miss" may seem lacking respect to some mid-age women. "Mz" is kinda like "ma'am" but not quite as old. Confused yet? So am I. Sorry, ignore me, I'm bored this evening.

Most of the time, when I address a person that I do not know the name of, I don't call them anything at all, I just say whatever it is I wanted to say or ask whatever it is I wanted to ask. Like "Excuse me, can you direct me to the..." etc.. etc.. That way you can't go wrong!

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[Ramon de Ramon y Ramon]

I have just realized that none of the ladies themselves has replied here so far - and naturally started to wonder why that is ... Don't they have any preferences as to how they like to be addressed ?

Well, if they keep shunning me like that, I still might be tempted to go with Dio's suggestion ...

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So long !

R³ - proud to be the official spokesman for the most noble Lady Bilqis, Desert Rose of Ironworks

Btw, the cow is queuing in the slaughterhouse right now !

[Ladyzekke]

LOLLOLLOL!!!!!! FC!!! That is funny as shite, especially with that avatar next to your words!

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[The_ Fur_Cough]

Is Ladyzekke a man? Jeez, I nearly messed up there.

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Aaahh.... Fur Cough.

[Lord of Alcohol]

LadyZekke is a man.... named Wendy Sorry Wendy and once again

[Ramon de Ramon y Ramon]

Originally posted by ladyzekke: Howbout "Honey" Ramon... Just kidding! Actually "ma'am" to me I feel like something a person uses to address an older lady, "miss" for a younger lady. But then again "miss" may seem lacking respect to some mid-age women. "Mz" is kinda like "ma'am" but not quite as old. Confused yet? So am I. Sorry, ignore me, I'm bored this evening. Most of the time, when I address a person that I do not know the name of, I don't call them anything at all, I just say whatever it is I wanted to say or ask whatever it is I wanted to ask. Like "Excuse me, can you direct me to the..." etc.. etc.. That way you can't go wrong!

Sorry, Hon , I had not seen your post before posting my last bit.

Hm, your advice to just skip the formal address altogether might be good practical advice for everyday life, but unfortunately won't serve to solve my "problem" here on IW - that would be simply NO fun at all !

I am shocked to hear that you are bored tonight: what could we do to change that completely unacceptable situation ? Dive to the deepest depths of the ocean to bring you one of those awkward-looking deep-water fishes that nobody has ever seen before ? Start to strangle polar bears with our bare hands ?

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So long !

R³ - proud to be the official spokesman for the most noble Lady Bilqis, Desert Rose of Ironworks

Btw, the cow is queuing in the slaughterhouse right now !

[This message has been edited by Ramon de Ramon y Ramon (edited 09-13-2001).]