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Old 08-16-2002, 07:41 PM   #1
Evil Al
Drow Warrior
 

Join Date: October 5, 2001
Location: Aberdeen, United Kingdom
Age: 38
Posts: 292
Before I start this isn't about having a problem with the vertically challeged. That's a completly different matter, that I will not bring up here because I know I would offend Mojo "Too Short" Jojo Jnr.

I my problem is with young girls stalking me. I have no idea how it started but a young lass of the age 14 has taken an unnatural attraction towards me. Her and her little friend are forever calling round my house and phoning me. I have tried everything I can think of to make her go away. I tried explaining that she's too young for me in the nicest possible way, but she thought I was playng hard to get. I sent her a rather blunt email (very unchristian of me I know) but that also made her think i was playing hard to get. I thought it worked for a while but it turned out she was just out the country for 5 weeks and forgot about it by the time she got back. She turned up at my house and talked to her little friend on my door step for about 20 mins while I beat my head off the wall trying to think of ways to get her to go away. Then I went with "Well, I'm going out later with my friends that are all over the age of consent and I won't be put on the same list as Gary Gilitter if I just so happen to get off with one of them. I have to go get ready, BYE!" Then I closed the door, they knocked again but i didn't answer.

Later on that night I got a phone call from a nut case. I person that I know has from ADD. Generally from the amount of rubbish she speaks. I know for a fact she says she's Pagan but I, a Christian, know more about paganism than her. She also clams to be a Christian and a Devil worshiper and all that crap. You get the idea, she not right in the head. Anyways, she calls me to ask if i would go out with her sometime. I said "no" flatly. For some reason I felt bad about it, mainly cause I know that her mates are going to try and bully me into going out with her. Just how immature is that?

Another thing, all these girls seem to fancy me, Mojo and my mate Mark. Seriously, is disturbing, what can we do? Curse my pretty boy face! The joke is no longer "What has 500 legs and no pubic hair? The first 5 rows of a westlife concert." Its "What has 500 legs and no pubic hair? The girls that stalk Al, Joe and Mark!"

Does anyone else have this problem? More so, did anyone have this problem and how did you get rid of it?
Well, I'm going to turn the lights out and pretend I'm not at home and switch my moblie off.
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Old 08-16-2002, 07:46 PM   #2
Lord of Alcohol
Xanathar Thieves Guild
 

Join Date: January 8, 2001
Location: Charlotte,NC
Age: 60
Posts: 4,570
Go ahead and do them all and show what a complete dud you are in bed and all problems are taken care of. It seems to have worked for the other girls at www.evilalsadudinbed.com [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 08-16-2002, 07:52 PM   #3
Evil Al
Drow Warrior
 

Join Date: October 5, 2001
Location: Aberdeen, United Kingdom
Age: 38
Posts: 292
Lol, did i mention I don't want to be put on the same list as Gary Glitter (thats the sex offenders redgister)? Anyways, I'm not a dud in bed, just ask any of Mojo's ex-girlfriends and present girlfriend, hell ask Mojo himself. He knows it ain't true, don't you hunny?
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Old 08-16-2002, 07:54 PM   #4
Mojo
Elminster
 

Join Date: July 17, 2002
Location: Aberdeenshire, Scotland, UK
Age: 37
Posts: 451
I have that problem! Oh wait...u knew that...

I see you have seen fit to use the joke I told you only a night ago. Maybe if u stopped stealing other peoples wittiness they wouldn't like u so much [img]tongue.gif[/img]

And, by the way, I'm not "too short" as u put it. I'm 2 inches shorter than u, without my boots on, so u just zippit.
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Old 08-16-2002, 08:00 PM   #5
Mojo
Elminster
 

Join Date: July 17, 2002
Location: Aberdeenshire, Scotland, UK
Age: 37
Posts: 451
Quote:
Originally posted by Evil Al:
Anyways, I'm not a dud in bed, just ask any of Mojo's ex-girlfriends and present girlfriend, hell ask Mojo himself. He knows it ain't true, don't you hunny?
AAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH Nooo! [img]graemlins/1puke.gif[/img]

The only ex of mine who u could be reffering to was a slut, and she told me ur nothing compared to me, so there. As for my present girlfriend, she hates you, what more can I say?

As for me...you just stay the hell away from me, pal
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Old 08-16-2002, 08:00 PM   #6
AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe
Hathor
 

Join Date: October 11, 2001
Location: At My Computer
Age: 43
Posts: 2,217
Just lay it out to them straight mate. Don;t try and be polite about it anymore. The time for that has passed. Just in no uncertain words tell her to bug off. Tell that even if satutory rape laws didn't exist, which they do, tell he you have no physical attraction at all for her, and you are never going to, ever not matter if she got plastic surgery and everything. Tell people need to have a spark between them, and for you two its just not there, so she needs to get over it and move on. Tell her you met somone last night, and you and her are going to start dating. She'll probably be really upset for a while, but in the long run it is better for her. If that doesnt work, you can always have her deported, there's this guy I know in parliment and . . . .

[ 08-16-2002, 08:02 PM: Message edited by: AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe ]
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Old 08-16-2002, 08:09 PM   #7
Evil Al
Drow Warrior
 

Join Date: October 5, 2001
Location: Aberdeen, United Kingdom
Age: 38
Posts: 292
[quote]Originally posted by Mojo:
Quote:
AAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH Nooo! [img]graemlins/1puke.gif[/img]

The only ex of mine who u could be reffering to was a slut, and she told me ur nothing compared to me, so there. As for my present girlfriend, she hates you, what more can I say?

As for me...you just stay the hell away from me, pal
No Mojo, don't deny our love! And I do believe you started stealing my jokes first to immpress that Kristi chick! Remember hearing all my jokes third had in a way that was just not funny!

AzRaeL, deporting them sounds like a good idea. Pity Austrlia isn't a prison cloney anymore... Now its full of nice respectable people...
But I'll try your idea of being blunt. After all the truth hurts.
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I\'m not bigheaded but go here and tell me just how sexy i am [url]\"http://www.faceparty.com/al_the_drunkard\" target=\"_blank\">www.faceparty.com/al_the_drunkard</a><br /><br />War in iraq? Not in my name!<br /><br />Disarm America.
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Old 08-16-2002, 09:13 PM   #8
Sir Mandorallen
Baaz Draconian
 

Join Date: November 7, 2001
Location: Fal Dara of Shienar
Age: 36
Posts: 790
I kinda have the same problem, but on a MUCH smaller scale. Girls that are two to three years my juinor keep on giving me that same stare and bothering me, sometimes at the most in-opratune(sp?) times. Such as during a soccer game. (don't ask)

But they don't go as far as to call me or come to my house and bug me. (most likely because I try and make sure they don't know where I live, or my number for that matter. [img]tongue.gif[/img] )

But its not that many either.... maybe only 3 or 4. But I seem to run into them alot. :\

Ah, well. As I said, they don't bother me that much, so I leave them alone.
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Old 08-16-2002, 09:28 PM   #9
Andrew Mcveigh
Drow Warrior
 

Join Date: August 1, 2002
Location: Burnaby, BC
Age: 36
Posts: 250
i have a sister who acts like that to other guys. and i'm happy to say i have the solution. tell her in a mean voice, "i don't like u! u drive me nuts! you're ugly! you're immature! so **** off and leave me alone!" believe me, they'll hate u, but at least they won't be trying to get in your pants anymore.

(but then again, maybe they'll start to stalk u and tell u how much they hate u... u know what? just get a damn restraining order!)
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Old 08-16-2002, 11:59 PM   #10
johnny
40th Level Warrior
 
Ms Pacman Champion
Join Date: April 15, 2002
Location: Utrecht The Netherlands
Age: 58
Posts: 16,981
Just tell her you love her, you know you do.
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