Dog vs Cat

Charean · 04-30-2002, 06:49 PM

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY

Day number 180
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182
8:00 ! am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
1:30 pm - ooooooo. BATH, BUMMER!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling
objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry
cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the
mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet
while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the
stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I
once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this
on their bed.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an
attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike
fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good
little cat I was ...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason
I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a
burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a
liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was
placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise
and smell the foul odor of the glass bottles they call "beer". More
importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe
snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an
informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is
assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.

Beltazar · 04-30-2002, 06:52 PM

LMAO, that kinda seems like my cat and dog..

04-30-2002, 07:27 PM

That's my first real laugh of the day!!!! Thanks Charean.

Cats rule supreme!!!

/)eathKiller · 04-30-2002, 08:16 PM

Cats Rule Dogs Drool [img]tongue.gif[/img]

slayer666 · 05-01-2002, 12:42 AM

...GReat...it seem s as though we have a cat lover

slayer666 · 05-01-2002, 12:42 AM

...GReat...it seem s as though we have a cat lover

Campino · 05-01-2002, 01:11 AM

That was great Charean!Real funny [img]smile.gif[/img]

shadowhound · 05-01-2002, 05:55 AM

Yes, as no one ever expected, the cats are slowly overtaking the world and when the world domination is complete the cats shall rule and thier allies will be in a position of power. FWAHAHAHA

/)eathKiller · 05-01-2002, 06:59 AM

Hmm.... I've got a good way of deciding which is better:

The Question: Which Would you Rather go out on a date with?

I doubt there's much contest...

05-01-2002, 07:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by slayer666:
...GReat...it seem s as though we have a cat lover

your point? [img]tongue.gif[/img]

cats ROCK!

04-30-2002, 06:52 PM	#2
Beltazar Zhentarim Guard Join Date: April 22, 2002 Location: San Anselmo CA Posts: 306	LMAO, that kinda seems like my cat and dog.. __________________ <br /><br />\"Just trust me. After all I\'m the floating, glowing guy.\"

04-30-2002, 08:16 PM	#4
/)eathKiller Dracolisk Join Date: January 5, 2002 Location: Guantanamo Bay, Cuba Age: 38 Posts: 6,043	Cats Rule Dogs Drool [img]tongue.gif[/img] __________________ [img]\"http://membres.lycos.fr/th8or/ZeroSigForIronworks.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> o.o;

05-01-2002, 12:42 AM	#5
slayer666 The Magister Join Date: April 25, 2002 Location: Mukilteo, Washington, US of A Posts: 114	...GReat...it seem s as though we have a cat lover __________________ <img border=\"0\" alt=\"[1drizzt]\" title=\"\" src=\"graemlins/1drizzt.gif\" /> <br />\"Where in the nine hells did you get the notion that I was going to fight fair?\" -Drizzt Do\'Urden<br /><br />All bow down to System of a Down!

05-01-2002, 12:42 AM	#6
slayer666 The Magister Join Date: April 25, 2002 Location: Mukilteo, Washington, US of A Posts: 114	...GReat...it seem s as though we have a cat lover __________________ <img border=\"0\" alt=\"[1drizzt]\" title=\"\" src=\"graemlins/1drizzt.gif\" /> <br />\"Where in the nine hells did you get the notion that I was going to fight fair?\" -Drizzt Do\'Urden<br /><br />All bow down to System of a Down!

04-30-2002, 07:27 PM	#3
lroyo Guest Posts: n/a	That's my first real laugh of the day!!!! Thanks Charean. Cats rule supreme!!!

05-01-2002, 01:11 AM	#7
Campino Avatar Join Date: November 12, 2001 Location: Netherlands Age: 55 Posts: 522	That was great Charean!Real funny [img]smile.gif[/img] __________________

05-01-2002, 05:55 AM	#8
shadowhound Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice Join Date: November 24, 2001 Location: Australia Age: 37 Posts: 3,281	Yes, as no one ever expected, the cats are slowly overtaking the world and when the world domination is complete the cats shall rule and thier allies will be in a position of power. FWAHAHAHA __________________ Carpe Noctem: Ph’nglui mglw’nafh cthulhu r’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.

05-01-2002, 06:59 AM	#9
/)eathKiller Dracolisk Join Date: January 5, 2002 Location: Guantanamo Bay, Cuba Age: 38 Posts: 6,043	Hmm.... I've got a good way of deciding which is better: The Question: Which Would you Rather go out on a date with? I doubt there's much contest... __________________ [img]\"http://membres.lycos.fr/th8or/ZeroSigForIronworks.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> o.o;

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