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View Poll Results: Has anyone ever tried to pick up/chat up your girlfriend/wife in public?
Yes 47 72.31%
No 18 27.69%
Voters: 65. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
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Old 07-14-2003, 06:23 AM   #21
Ar-Cunin
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Join Date: August 14, 2001
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
Age: 52
Posts: 2,326
Just lock her up at home, Memnoch. You can release her when she's old and grey
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Old 07-14-2003, 06:42 AM   #22
Mr. Mopery
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Join Date: December 13, 2001
Location: Warsaw
Age: 48
Posts: 328
Just a thought... You do live in Australia, right? In my limited experience, Aussie guys seemed to possess a certain...um...joie d'vive, while simultaneously lacking any semblence of tact. (Sorry for the stereotype)

Maybe it's partly a cultural thing?

Or maybe it's just that nobody wants to hit on my girlfriend... [img]graemlins/awcrap.gif[/img]
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Old 07-14-2003, 07:01 AM   #23
Memnoch
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Join Date: February 28, 2001
Location: Boston/Sydney
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That's right Mr Mopery - Ozzies have a way of assuming that nobody else in the world could conceivably be as important or desirable as them. Makes it all the more pleasant when they realise that the cab they're trying to hail is already taken. [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

It's quite funny though seeing the guy try to come up with some subtle (or not so subtle) way of trying to work out who you are, eh...
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Old 07-14-2003, 07:17 AM   #24
Harkoliar
Jack Burton
 

Join Date: March 21, 2001
Location: Philippines, but now Harbor City Sydney
Age: 40
Posts: 5,556
hey memnoch!
yeah i got the same reactions before and i try and keep my own feeling out of control. its not good to make a scene only to embarass yourself and hers as well. since you have a beautiful GF (personal opinion) you cant help it that she attracts guys you know. personally i would just watched out for her and all that. thats my 2c [img]smile.gif[/img]
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Old 07-14-2003, 08:34 AM   #25
mysticelt
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Join Date: February 25, 2003
Location: maryland
Age: 65
Posts: 276
Memnoch,

Try catching her eye and holding it with a smile to or from wherever you are going. Anticipating your return, looking for you. (I know MY Guy isn't as funny/sexy/smart as these smarmy jokers; where is he?) Hey! If he is just as excited to see me everytime as I am him, that keeps the party happening!
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Old 07-14-2003, 10:36 AM   #26
Finn
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Join Date: October 14, 2002
Location: Asia
Age: 47
Posts: 139
Memnoch, from you've said so far, it looks like your lady knows how to handle herself but I guess from what you've described, being too sweet and nice, it may be difficult for her to fend off persistent sleazy "hound dogs".

Short of appearing like a jealous boyfriend or starting a bar brawl, you could display subtle signs that say "this lady is with me" like holding her hands for example. Most girls won't think that they're bf/spouse is just being jealous when they interviene in such a situation. On the contrary, they'd appreciate knowing that their
"knight in shining armour" is there to make them feel valued and protected. [img]smile.gif[/img]


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Old 07-14-2003, 10:45 AM   #27
Memnoch
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Join Date: February 28, 2001
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Quote:
Originally posted by Finn:
Memnoch, from you've said so far, it looks like your lady knows how to handle herself but I guess from what you've described, being too sweet and nice, it may be difficult for her to fend off persistent sleazy "hound dogs".

Short of appearing like a jealous boyfriend or starting a bar brawl, you could display subtle signs that say "this lady is with me" like holding her hands for example. Most girls won't think that they're bf/spouse is just being jealous when they interviene in such a situation. On the contrary, they'd appreciate knowing that their
"knight in shining armour" is there to make them feel valued and protected. [img]smile.gif[/img]


Thanks for the advice...she is very sweet, but I she's learned to look after herself. She's just a very genuine, down to earth person and a lot of guys mistake that friendliness as a sign that she might be interested. I'm totally cool with that because that friendliness and warmth towards people is part of what I love about her - she's beautiful on the inside as well as outside. I usually leave her be, it's only if some sleazeball's really not leaving her alone that I then come to give her a hand. [img]smile.gif[/img]

In a way, I can't blame any of these blokes - I met T at a nightclub, after all. [img]smile.gif[/img]

I didn't want this to be a thread solely about *my issue*, btw - I'm also quite curious as to your own personal experiences with this, anecdotes and such. Tell me how you guys dealt with it, how it made YOU feel when someone did this to YOUR girl/guy - don't try and apply it solely to my situation, which I'm confident I have pretty much under control - tell me what YOU guys did. It's quite an intriguing topic, isn't it!

[ 07-14-2003, 10:46 AM: Message edited by: Memnoch ]
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Old 07-14-2003, 10:52 AM   #28
Rokenn
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Join Date: January 22, 2002
Location: california wine country
Age: 60
Posts: 2,193
I trust my lady completely. So I mostly find it amusing
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Old 07-14-2003, 12:02 PM   #29
Cloudbringer
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Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
Quote:
Originally posted by Memnoch:
I just realised I forgot to give my own opinion. Maybe I didn't want to skew the poll.

First of all, this has happened to me with every girl I've been out with...but with Taryn it happens a hell of a lot more - practically every time we go out. Once we went out to a basketball game, went outside to have a cigarette, and a couple of blokes tried picking her up while we were having a cigarette.

It used to piss me off before, you get amused and pissed off at the same time - I mean once in a while it's fine, but all the time it gets really irritating. I didn't mind people talking to her or flirting with her, it's only those I-love-myself-types that sleaze on her that pissed me off. Plus she's such a nice sweet girl, she'll give anyone the time of day, so I was a bit worried about her maybe leading people on. Then I just got over it - don't really care now, it's quite funny watching them actually. I trust her to handle herself or find some way to extricate herself from the situation. But you always keep an eye, and be ready to provide support if required.
LOL, I answered about the same way- pissed off but amused and let him handle it but keep an eye out.

My fiance is a sweet, personable guy and several times since we've been together he's had women assume his friendly chats and listening when they had troubles to unload, meant he was willing to have a more intimate relationship with them. One he told flat out he wasn't interested and had a gf (her advances were pretty aggressive and hard to ignore! the kicker here is after he told her 'not interested at all, got a lady of my own', she then made similar advances toward ME! [img]graemlins/wow.gif[/img] ) and another knew he and I were an item but pursued him anyway, till he actually stopped being nice and avoided all contact with her. A third (MARRIED woman) flirted heavily, acted like a concerned 'advisor' in their conversations, then actually had the audacity to try and tell him he wasn't ready for a relationship and should dump me. Now THAT didn't sit well with me when I found out. Not that my honey ever took her advice.

So basically, I trust Jim and let him deal with things. I know he'll do what Wellard does- that is, say something about his committments before the lady gets the wrong idea, but I do keep an eye out in case he needs a fiancee to come in and make the situation very clear. And after next spring, he'll be sporting a wedding band, for extra emphasis!
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Old 07-14-2003, 12:23 PM   #30
Timber Loftis
40th Level Warrior
 

Join Date: July 11, 2002
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 11,916
Memsie, this happens a lot with my wife. And, being a latin woman, she prides herself on the number of men who show interest. Culture thing.

It doesn't bother me UNLESS THEY KNOW WE'RE AN ITEM. Any idiot can see those big honkin' diamonds I paid through the nose for -- well, maybe they're not THAT big, but still. That's when the male behavior treads into disrespectful territory. Hitting on my wife when you don't know the situation is one thing, but with me right there you are either being stupid or rude. Neither is acceptable by my standards.

I let her handle it most always. If it's an encounter when I'm across the room, at the loo, etc, I introduce myself to the guy (or she introduces me), who usually doesn't hang around too long afterwards.

The guys who do it with me there, I usually just say, "And you are?" or "Who are you?" as an "icebreaker." In other words, if they're going to challenge me in that way, I stand up to and intervene -- on my behalf more than hers (again -- she can take care of herself). Then we usually square off, each piss on a tree to mark our territory, and then lock horns. I'm only half-joking -- because at those times it really is akin to ritualistic mating challenges on Wild Kingdom.

[ 07-14-2003, 12:25 PM: Message edited by: Timber Loftis ]
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