Is she Lying? Can it be true??? Do I want to believe it?

Larry_OHF · 08-23-2001, 02:26 PM

Catchy little title phrase, isn't it

Ok, Inspired by my previous topic, I would like to ask the question...
Is my wife lying, by saying that she does not find any other male on this planet attractive? Is she really keeping her mariage vows, and not even looking at other men with the least bit of desire? I know that I do find other ladies atractive, and I cannot help that, but when I asked her if she did(to justify my feelings), she said that she never looked at other guys. How can that be possible? Are there any of you women here that can relate or disspute this? Are there any men on here that only has eyes for your own? Please be honest, as I am feeling like dirt, and need some sort of proof that I am not a bad husband. Help!!!!

------------------

Devoted member of the Ironworks
Loyal guardian of the OHF
Member of the Ancients' club
Faith beset in The Rocks
(they show the way, you know...)

domingo · 08-23-2001, 02:28 PM

I think that it is only natural to find other women attractive ... Just as long as you don't act on those feelings.

Link · 08-23-2001, 02:30 PM

Everyone lies now and then, so don't bother. And from my opinion: i think she's definitely lying. There must be other men on this planet which she finds attractive... How could she know: like she ever met the 4 billion men that walk around on this world????

------------------
In the foul darkness one figure will emerge to save the world from evil and despair.... Light flashes as his sword comes down, and thunder rolls through the sky when he points his sword up to heaven to signal his victory....People whisper his name as he walks by, evil tries to hide as they sense his presence nearby.... His name? Link......

MILAMBER · 08-23-2001, 02:32 PM

She's lying. There's no way she doesn't find other men attracive. She might not think they are as attractive as you...but there's no way she doesn't think they're attractive.

If she doesn't find any other of the billions of men in this world attractive, you married a lesbian nun.

------------------
"The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his."
-General George Patton (1885-1945)

Member of CLAN HADB

Larry_OHF · 08-23-2001, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MILAMBER:
...you married a lesbian nun.

How did you know?!

Justa joke...

------------------

Devoted member of the Ironworks
Loyal guardian of the OHF
Member of the Ancients' club
Faith beset in The Rocks
(they show the way, you know...)

Melusine · 08-23-2001, 02:52 PM

Wow....this really reminds me of my best friend's situation.
She has been together with her ex for about four years, and unfortunately, she was extremely, almost pathologically, jealous. She did try hard not to be a nag and her boyfriend told her a million times he did not think any other woman on the world beautiful. He said he never even looked at another woman, let alone find her attractive. Still, my friend couldn't help herself from getting paranoid and she kept asking him about it. In the end I told her he was lying because it would be impossible for a guy never to even like the sight of another woman (even when you're only attracted to your partner, don't you find other women aesthetically pleasing to look at??). We then realised her paranoia sprung for a large deal from her subconscious knowledge that he wasn't speaking the truth. Instinctively she knew he must find other women attractive and the reason for her jealousy spells was the question she subconsciously asked herself: "What does he have to hide that he has to tell me this lie?"

Not sure if that will help...it just struck me as the same thing.
I wouldn't say your wife is LYING, exactly. I can imagine that she just has feelings for you only and, because she can only feel real attraction to the man she loves, does not find other men attractive (my boyfriend is an example of this, and I don't feel like a bad girlfriend for being attracted to other men, as long as it's only that, superficial attraction that I will forget as soon as the guy leaves my sight.) I don't believe, however, that your wife truly does not find any other man good-looking.

------------------
Melusine, High Queen of Fluffies, Archbabe of the OHF, the LH,
the HADB and the SPAE(Society for the
Prevention of Acronym Extinction) &
Official Entertainer Elf of the BG2 Bar

Your voice is ambrosia
Amy Brown Fantasy Art

Moridin · 08-23-2001, 02:58 PM

I know I look at other women and find them attractive, and I most certainly know my wife does/did

.....the point being that if your wife does not find anyone else attractive I would buy her a pair of glasses, she obviously needs them

One way to find out is ask one of her girlfriends, women (& men) talk about this all the time to each other and then go home and say "I only have eyes for you" sheesh what a load!

------------------

Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig
I've got to admit it's getting better, it's getting better all the time

Sazerac · 08-23-2001, 03:02 PM

Just out of curiosity, why ask this question? What would one hope to gain from either answer, if neither one will give satisfaction?

It's like a girlfriend asking her boyfriend, "Do you think she's prettier than I am?" when watching Pamela Anderson on TV. The poor boyfriend is dead in the water; no matter which way he answers, yes or no, he's done for. If he answers "yes", he's DEAD (LOL) and if he answers "no", he's branded a liar. Of course, better to be a liar than dead, so most will answer "no"; in which case it starts a 4 hour + discussion on WHY the girlfriend isn't prettier than Ms. Anderson, including an cross-examination of everything the bf is saying in support of his claim.

In short, Larry, give your poor wife a break. Of course she's lying. ANYONE would lie in those circumstances. She married you, therefore she chose you and wants to be with you. That's the most important thing of all, after all. Knowing that you do find other ladies attractive, and aren't going to act on it, just assume that your wife does find other males attractive, and won't act on it as well. She loves you, and that's what's important. Take comfort and security in the life the two of you have.

Cheers,

------------------

Melusine · 08-23-2001, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sazerac:
Just out of curiosity, why ask this question? What would one hope to gain from either answer, if neither one will give satisfaction?

It's like a girlfriend asking her boyfriend, "Do you think she's prettier than I am?" when watching Pamela Anderson on TV. The poor boyfriend is dead in the water; no matter which way he answers, yes or no, he's done for. If he answers "yes", he's DEAD (LOL) and if he answers "no", he's branded a liar. Of course, better to be a liar than dead, so most will answer "no"; in which case it starts a 4 hour + discussion on WHY the girlfriend isn't prettier than Ms. Anderson, including an cross-examination of everything the bf is saying in support of his claim.

In short, Larry, give your poor wife a break. Of course she's lying. ANYONE would lie in those circumstances. She married you, therefore she chose you and wants to be with you. That's the most important thing of all, after all. Knowing that you do find other ladies attractive, and aren't going to act on it, just assume that your wife does find other males attractive, and won't act on it as well. She loves you, and that's what's important. Take comfort and security in the life the two of you have.

Cheers,

Exactly, THANK YOU Saz!! That was actually the point I was trying to illustrate with my story. My friend was no better off with a boyfriend who told her this lie, and her continuous questions about it made it even worse. If you just accept that every man sometimes turns his head after a beautiful woman and vice versa for women, you'll have a lot less to worry about. To me it's not even a problem anyway, just human nature, and it has nothing to do with actually cheating or even planning to.

------------------
Melusine, High Queen of Fluffies, Archbabe of the OHF, the LH,
the HADB and the SPAE(Society for the
Prevention of Acronym Extinction) &
Official Entertainer Elf of the BG2 Bar

Your voice is ambrosia
Amy Brown Fantasy Art

08-23-2001, 03:11 PM

I think she can be saying that and telling the truth.
She may see other men, but none register to her as an attraction of any kind because she has you.

I've been put in her situation myself more than once...take her word for it, if you did not attract her, she would not be with you.

------------------

You know childhood is over when a puddle seems like an obstacle instead of an opportunity.

Is Too! Is Not! Is Too! Is Not!

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08-23-2001, 02:26 PM	#1
Larry_OHF Ironworks Moderator Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Midlands, South Carolina Age: 48 Posts: 14,759	Catchy little title phrase, isn't it Ok, Inspired by my previous topic, I would like to ask the question... Is my wife lying, by saying that she does not find any other male on this planet attractive? Is she really keeping her mariage vows, and not even looking at other men with the least bit of desire? I know that I do find other ladies atractive, and I cannot help that, but when I asked her if she did(to justify my feelings), she said that she never looked at other guys. How can that be possible? Are there any of you women here that can relate or disspute this? Are there any men on here that only has eyes for your own? Please be honest, as I am feeling like dirt, and need some sort of proof that I am not a bad husband. Help!!!! ------------------ Devoted member of the Ironworks Loyal guardian of the OHF Member of the *Ancients'* club Faith beset in *The Rocks* (they show the way, you know...)

08-23-2001, 02:28 PM	#2
domingo Zhentarim Guard Join Date: August 11, 2001 Location: St. George Utah USA Posts: 331	I think that it is only natural to find other women attractive ... Just as long as you don't act on those feelings.

08-23-2001, 02:30 PM	#3
Link Jack Burton Join Date: May 15, 2001 Location: The Netherlands Age: 39 Posts: 5,888	Everyone lies now and then, so don't bother. And from my opinion: i think she's definitely lying. There must be other men on this planet which she finds attractive... How could she know: like she ever met the 4 billion men that walk around on this world???? ------------------ In the foul darkness one figure will emerge to save the world from evil and despair.... Light flashes as his sword comes down, and thunder rolls through the sky when he points his sword up to heaven to signal his victory....People whisper his name as he walks by, evil tries to hide as they sense his presence nearby.... His name? Link......

08-23-2001, 02:32 PM	#4
MILAMBER Lord Soth Join Date: March 5, 2001 Location: Southern California Posts: 1,948	She's lying. There's no way she doesn't find other men attracive. She might not think they are as attractive as you...but there's no way she doesn't think they're attractive. If she doesn't find any other of the billions of men in this world attractive, you married a lesbian nun. ------------------ "The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his." -General George Patton (1885-1945) Member of CLAN HADB

08-23-2001, 02:52 PM	#6
Melusine Dracolisk Join Date: January 8, 2001 Location: Amsterdam, The Netherlands Age: 43 Posts: 6,541	Wow....this really reminds me of my best friend's situation. She has been together with her ex for about four years, and unfortunately, she was extremely, almost pathologically, jealous. She did try hard not to be a nag and her boyfriend told her a million times he did not think any other woman on the world beautiful. He said he never even looked at another woman, let alone find her attractive. Still, my friend couldn't help herself from getting paranoid and she kept asking him about it. In the end I told her he was lying because it would be impossible for a guy never to even like the sight of another woman (even when you're only attracted to your partner, don't you find other women aesthetically pleasing to look at??). We then realised her paranoia sprung for a large deal from her subconscious knowledge that he wasn't speaking the truth. Instinctively she knew he must find other women attractive and the reason for her jealousy spells was the question she subconsciously asked herself: "What does he have to hide that he has to tell me this lie?" Not sure if that will help...it just struck me as the same thing. I wouldn't say your wife is LYING, exactly. I can imagine that she just has feelings for you only and, because she can only feel real attraction to the man she loves, does not find other men attractive (my boyfriend is an example of this, and I don't feel like a bad girlfriend for being attracted to other men, as long as it's only that, superficial attraction that I will forget as soon as the guy leaves my sight.) I don't believe, however, that your wife truly does not find any other man good-looking. ------------------ Melusine, High Queen of Fluffies, Archbabe of the OHF, the LH, the HADB and the SPAE(Society for the Prevention of Acronym Extinction) & Official Entertainer Elf of the BG2 Bar Your voice is ambrosia Amy Brown Fantasy Art

08-23-2001, 02:58 PM	#7
Moridin Fzoul Chembryl Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Minneapolis, MN Posts: 1,735	I know I look at other women and find them attractive, and I most certainly know my wife does/did .....the point being that if your wife does not find anyone else attractive I would buy her a pair of glasses, she obviously needs them One way to find out is ask one of her girlfriends, women (& men) talk about this all the time to each other and then go home and say "I only have eyes for you" sheesh what a load! ------------------ Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig I've got to admit it's getting better, it's getting better all the time

08-23-2001, 03:02 PM	#8
Sazerac Ironworks Moderator Join Date: January 7, 2001 Location: Monroe, LA Age: 60 Posts: 7,387	Just out of curiosity, why ask this question? What would one hope to gain from either answer, if neither one will give satisfaction? It's like a girlfriend asking her boyfriend, "Do you think she's prettier than I am?" when watching Pamela Anderson on TV. The poor boyfriend is dead in the water; no matter which way he answers, yes or no, he's done for. If he answers "yes", he's DEAD (LOL) and if he answers "no", he's branded a liar. Of course, better to be a liar than dead, so most will answer "no"; in which case it starts a 4 hour + discussion on WHY the girlfriend isn't prettier than Ms. Anderson, including an cross-examination of everything the bf is saying in support of his claim. In short, Larry, give your poor wife a break. Of course she's lying. ANYONE would lie in those circumstances. She married you, therefore she chose you and wants to be with you. That's the most important thing of all, after all. Knowing that you do find other ladies attractive, and aren't going to act on it, just assume that your wife does find other males attractive, and won't act on it as well. She loves you, and that's what's important. Take comfort and security in the life the two of you have. Cheers, ------------------

08-23-2001, 03:11 PM	#10
Moni Guest Posts: n/a	I think she can be saying that and telling the truth. She may see other men, but none register to her as an attraction of any kind because she has you. I've been put in her situation myself more than once...take her word for it, if you did not attract her, she would not be with you. ------------------ You know childhood is over when a puddle seems like an obstacle instead of an opportunity. Is Too! Is Not! Is Too! Is Not!

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