'Twas the Month After Christmas...Subject: The Month After Christmas!

[Garnet FalconDance]

Not mine, but sent by my sister.....hope you enjoy!


Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I would taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store it was less a walk than a lumber.
I remembered the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rare,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "None for me, please."

As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt---
I said to myself, as only I can
"You can't spend another winter disguised as a man!"

So -- away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie -- not even a lick.
I'll chew only on long celery sticks.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, life's no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

[Pangur Ban]

Brilliant, simply brilliant !!! ROFLOL [img]graemlins/nicekitty.gif[/img]

C'mon IW's, own up ----

1. Who just started a diet?
2. And if you did, do you think it is likely you will stay on it for more than two weeks?

I'm trying to be "good", but that box of fudge looks really nice ...

Pang.